Free yourself
If they free you
They're your freedom
You're stuck
until you no longer want freedom

اظهر لك ما أخفيه عن نفسي
تعال لأعزف على اوتارك ألحان التمني
فمعازفي تشتكي شوقا
وسفينتي تريد ان ترسي
عشت ببحرٍ، بعاصفةٍ، بقصرٍ
لكن افكاري تتوقك حينما تمسي  
إليك الرجوع و الانتماء
و أقصى رغبات البقاء
فكل ما دونك هراء
والحنين.. فيني لعينيك ليس له فناء
تشتهي نفسي الصحيح منك و الخطأ
تشتهي نفسي و يكاد ينهيها الظمأ
تشتهي نفسي لكن ما رغبت به بعيد
وليس كل مرغوب يدرك
وليس كل مبتسم سعيد..

I stand alone where we first stood
and the place offers me three pills

the first pill will give me the rush, the shivers and the loss of breath, one more warm cup of coffee with a last cigarette, burnt fingers with a puff of cold breeze and three cracked stars that no longer shine

The second pill will make me live through everything again and gives me a chance to ask the unasked questions for the sake of sanity

The third pill offers nothing but making all this go away
there was no good and bad
it was all just a sneak peek of perfection

I cling to my bed, sink your scent in
whisper to myself: "It's just you"

dragging myself into earth
I open the doors of reality to pick between
the burning fire
the darkest cave
and the edge of falling an endless fall

But knowing that by picking any of these doors
I'm accepting to be alone

I take all three pills and pick to stay where I am and go to deep sleep and let my dreams and nightmares choose for me

I take words for granted
So, I believed your stares when you thought I wasn't looking

The way your words playfully dance their way out of your breathtaking smirk

The way your hands hold my waist..
sometimes scared and very careful of not getting burned
and at times I can feel the tips of your fingers bruise "don't go away" on my back when you hold me right before I leave

I believed your heartbeats against mine

                               I take words for granted
                    Now I take actions for granted as well

Frowns caused by:
Not being able to reach the rocks in the bottom of the prettiest ocean to draw you the path that suits your existence

Not being able to show you the orchids you grew beneath my skin, the dead stars that's tucked underneath my eyelids or the half dead butterflies that keep feeding on the shivers down my spine

Stepping on the tips of my toes to grab a handhold of the cloud you named after us, I have a taste of the disappointment

We get high on thoughts we seek

Frowns caused by everything but you

I am the smoke you breath in then out and disappear for you to take another puff

I am the dried tears on your cheeks that's caused by sanity and nonsense

I am the night clouds that cover the moon and stars and everything that's beautiful

I am the seaweed in that ocean of yours

I am
Perhaps
Not what belongs to you
Perhaps
Not yet

I hide behind the trees from people, my own thoughts, reality, and you

the waves sing your name
the stars draw a picture of your cheeks
the trees hand me a crown of magical leaves that forbids such things as you

I'm far away from everything else
my plan almost worked
but I found you sitting and staring at the door that I escape to whenever I turn everything off, you're there and I can't do nor want to do anything about it

I guess what the waves, the stars, the unmagical crown of leaves are trying to make me realize is: perhaps I miss you