i simultaneously long for life and death
i want to **** myself, but don't want to die
i want to disappear into a nothingness
i want to float up into the sky
     (but maybe that's just a teenager thing)

in crowds, i get panicked and weepy
alone, i suffocate on the floor
i belong to no person or thing or place
and i fall to pieces behind that bedroom door
     (but maybe that's just a teenager thing)

sometimes, i'm just teeming with emotion
the pain and the love and the best and the worst
all of the feelings get twisted together
until i'm sure that i'm going to burst
     (but maybe that's just a teenager thing)

on the contrary, sometimes i feel numb
i'm immune to the pain of this place
i can't feel the good or the bad or ugly
it's amazing what you can hide behind a happy face
     (but maybe that's just a teenager thing)

i constantly feel like i'm empty
and that i've got nothing left to give
i feel like i'm broken and done for
and that there's no reason for me to live
     (but maybe that's just a teenager thing)

i write suicide notes in my free time
and count the number of ways i could do it
and hide pills away in the drawers of my dresser
like my own little "how-to" death kit
     (but maybe that's just a teenager thing)

i keep razors and knives in my bookcase
i have methodically placed lines on my wrist
i long for the pain and the blood that it brings
i flirt with the demon of death, and then give it a kiss
     (but maybe that's just a teenager thing)

i live in a world of pain and anxiety
in constant fear of the people that i'm supposed to love
i think that i want to die, but what is want is to be free
depression's the cage, and i am the dove

but i guess that must be a teenager thing.

she had emerald eyes and messy hair
we ran around town dishing out dares
we broke the law twice that night
as we danced in the streets looking for a fight
i had dorky glasses, and her hair matched her name
we treated our lives like one big game
we glided through the air on playground swings
for a second i believed that we both had wings
we drew funny faces on a concrete wall
and traded our shirts outside the church hall
we had a thousand adventures that started at dusk
and ended when we woke up in her room smelling like musk
being in her presence gave me an electric shock
with her there was no time, no hours on the clock
she lit up my life with on single night
and then the very next day she had to take flight
i'll always remember the weekend we shared
i just wish that my broken heart could have been spared
she gave me adventure in a town such as this
my only regret is denying her that goodbye kiss

images flicker on a silver screen
frozen in time for all the world to see
captured moments stored away
taping every step you take or word you say
movies are much more than they seem
they're not just a monotonous series of scenes
they're beautiful memories and works of art
that have captured our history, and stolen our hearts.

keeping secrets, telling lies
hiding behind this disguise.
nobody knows, i steal and sneak
wouldn't you love to take a peek,
at the private life that i lead?
i want a lot, but it's you i need.

i wish i could tell you, what is and isn't true;
i know that i have to, but i hate to lie to you.
you are the one with whom i share all of my deepest fears,
and you are the one who i want to wipe away my falling tears.
of all the friends i've had, you're the one i want to keep,
and it's only you that can put my anxious mind to sleep.
so i'll man up, and take any punch they throw
just for the chance to tell you what i want you to know.

it's midnight, and i'm all alone
usually i'm fine being on my own
but thoughts of you seem to plague my mind
memories from before you are hard to find
because you have completely enraptured my brain
how is it that you are cause of my joy and the cause of my pain?

it's 1 am, and i'm by myself
i think that i was injured when i fell
i fell for you, and all your glory
won't you please tell me one last story?
just one more word before i drive myself mad
how is it that you can make me both happy and sad?

it's two am, and i'm terrified
your image has unleashed the demon inside
i know you don't love me, but neither do i
all of my unrequited feelings make me want to die
and my love for you has gone way too far
how is it that something so beautiful could leave such a scar?

it's three am, and i'm almost gone
all that's left of me is the sound of your favorite song
i've become such a beast for your love
preying on you like a hawk preys on a dove
but it's my body, not yours,  that i attack
how is it that no matter how much i love you, you won't love me back?

it's four am, and i'm merely a ghost
i'm at your mercy, tied to your whipping post
not the drink nor the blade nor the lighter can heal
nothing can change the fact that love for you is all that i can feel
i think of nothing but you as i lay still in my bed
how is it that something as brilliant as love could make someone dead?

it's six am, and it's time for me to wake
but my mother finds i won't move no matter how much she shakes
i've been found surrounded by blood in my eternal sleep
the love that i felt for you ran way too deep
so i tried to cut it out by shredding my veins
how is it that love could cause so much pain?

art is my own safe place
each night i shed my skin on stage
then put it back on with every page

art is my own safe place
each word i write helps me escape
everything i draw takes a new shape

art is my own safe place
acting helps me break out of my cage
i let the lines dissolve my rage

art is my own safe place
i know that words can make a change
because writing keeps the demons away

art is my own safe place
i put meaning into every play
artists know how to weaken chains

art is my own safe place
my imagination gets me through the day
creation is the only way