Think of me
Not the days in between
When the music
doesn't feel
right
Think of me
Think of that night
When everything seems dark
Let me be the light

Across interstates
New license plates
In a new states of mind

We will take one another
Until the day turns to night
And we'll say

Baby, Baby
Hold me tight
Baby, Baby
Just for tonight

And I will find you
In a sea of faces
That I don't recognize

And You will find me
In the lights of the city
You left behind

And i'll sing
Baby, baby
come back to me
baby, baby
won't you please

Baby, Baby
In a sea of faces
you're all I see

There is a ringing in my ears and the rain sings to me through broken shades.
I lie awake.
Hoping to catch a glimpse of you in the red light that comes from my record player.
But you aren't there.
You aren't anywhere.
I feel you in the shadows.
All around me.
I taste you on my lips.
When the light flickers.
So does this.

Wrapped around the room is felted flowers that turn to white stars.
When the sun is in hiding, little mushrooms bring light.
It smells of fake flowers and another mother.
A small broom for a small room.
I'm sorry I missed you.
I was spending.
Sobbing softly into my high collared coat.
Watching the body
In its stillness.

It's been so long since I've heard the rain.
Since I've smelt it's scent on cement. Since its touched my face.
It was early in the morning.
And you wouldn't come up again. Sitting in a rental car,
I ran out into the street.
Danced like I was in a movie.
Thinking you were going to follow me. When you didn't, I returned to foggy windows
& handed you keys, playfully.
My heart sunk a little when you kissed me.
Everything is different now.

Today fall came and reminded me what it's like to be lonely.
Red leaves reminded me of his sharp cheeks and cigarettes.
Black coffee.
Blue grief.
The rain so heavy, and the wind howling.
His name taste likes sugar and rots my teeth.
The first letter resting on a plain gold ring.
I'll be waiting.
Grasping onto silence.
Under the same moon.
He is chasing midnight lights and drinking whiskey.
My soul calls for him every waking moment,
wandering the streets,
but no one responds.

Thought I missed my city.
Changed my mind instantly.
As he sat, staring at me.
The rain was calming at first.
Now it's only making my brows furrow and my feet hurt.
This crowded space has me rubbing my tired eyes and licking my lips.
Tapping my foot to keep busy.
All I see through the fog of the windows is red and blue.
Thanking the Angels for keeping me safe like my godmother would do.
He won't stop staring.
Through lenses that look like something from a black and white comedy.
I can't laugh.
My gut hurts too much.
Leaning forward, almost touching me. Leaning back.
Looking at feet.
At the lack of trees.
Everything is too familiar.
I feel like I can't breathe.
Now he's standing and I feel guilty for feeling relief.
These buildings look just as lonely as I feel.
Graffitied.
Human work.
On them it's vandalism,
on me its self expression.
No one told me.
I suppose they don't have to now.
I'm finding out pretty quickly.
This is not what I expected.
Not at all what I wanted.
Tonight is the first night I've really felt it.
The distance.
Where does it live?  
In my knees?
In my veins?
In this city.
I want to leave too.
Like you.
If only it were that easy.

A cluttered space and a quickly approaching departure brings silence.
Chords wrap around my gut.
Anger swelling in the belly of my being.
My bones squeak as I tighten my muscles and bite my lip to keep this quiet.
A train passes.
My heart beats in my neck.
My chest is tight.
I squirm a bit and try to shake this feeling out of me.
It lingers in the tips of my fingers and toes.
God knows I'm going to fall apart.
Like ruble.
I will crumble.
But that can wait until tomorrow.
Tonight, we drink and dance.
On top of hotel beds, we bounce and say we're sorry.
Goodbye is too close to fight.
I'm rusting.
Turning a ***** orange and breathing iron.
There's a light that comes in through a boarded up window.
It reminds me that there is beauty in this chaos.
It reminds me that you are beautiful even when you drive me ******* crazy.