I took a deep breath once
Let it fill in all the cavities of my lungs
Prayed to God that it would be enough
To float me into space
But yet I stay

Kept it all in my lungs
Until the pressure on my chest
Became the only thing I felt

Let it constrict and collapse

If I were to die
I wanna die with this single breath
Lodged in my throat
I wanna see white with my eyes close
Let life slip with every exhale

Hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it.
Until it holds you

If I hold my breath long enough
Wait until my lungs constrict
Grab onto the nearest thing,

Will I become a tree?

If I stop trying to move with the wind
Give up on letting burnt skin
Touch lips with the sun,

Will I stop being me?

Breathe in. Breathe out.

I’ve seen clouds forming
Over wet concrete
And blue skies on a cloudy day

Yet, I still don’t know
What you’re smile looks like
Since I disappeared

I have held my heart in my arms
Stopped breathing.
Stopped moving.
And let the earth spin with me.

Was I suppose to pretend
That I was doing okay
I didn't know the rules

I was never going to leave this place
Should have never smiled like I did
If I had known sooner

I wouldn't have tried so hard to fit in

This is the place we grew
Stuck our hand in wet pavement
making our imprint on the world

This is the place we left behind
A fine memory of dust
and kicking rocks

This is the place we no longer love
filled with the old and the replaceable
counted our stacks and moved on.