And you...
You never could quite lift me up, without keeping me down

My emotions were so deeply meshed
I never thought to
pull back,
disconnect,
observe

I couldn't have if I wanted to - then

The years rolled on though

Fortitude found me

Wrapped its arms around me
Opened my eyes, to what my heart had been  concealing

I pulled back, disconnected...
observed

And I found myself in a dark and unforgiving place
And i stayed for a while. 
....a long while, really

This catharsis was painful,
Slow, and methodical

But....

I dug myself out, with nothing but fortitude to guide me

And..... I..... rose.

Fading to Grey
I wonder how long we'll ride this out
When the nostalgia runs stale
And the memory of what used to be abandons us for good
Our vanilla love, all those memories ago

The slow rolling storm,
Soon showed us its fury
Our will became
weathered
Never learning to love outside of expectaion

......but we pressed on down the line

Our weathervane of passionate desire,
Is it ever, everlasting?
and...
I remember when I used to tell you apathy
~ it was my biggest fear
And now it's become our home

I reach for my latest vice
And drown my heart
For a little while
At least until,
I am greeted again,

By those lackluster eyes
Their sad emptiness,
Dressed up, in an otherwise after-thought of a disguise

....better yet, this far down the line

So where do we go now Love
When only the chill of cold comforts are keeping us warm
In this kailidescope of complacency
Where the colours are slowly fading to grey

J.  Hitchcock 2019

The room is getting smaller now
...Or is the elephant getting bigger
Whichever...
The air is getting quite stale
And I am quietly suffocating
I force myself to put one foot in front of the other
...But I find it debilitating

Time seems to have picked up momentum and stopped,
In this relentless moment,
We keep reliving
Where the tides have run dry
And the winds have become still

I don't much like this emotional purgatory
Your comfort zone,
We call home
I used to wonder when, and how we got here
Or why we decided to unpack and stay

I never thought we'd get comfortable

And I never thought  I'd be leaving this place,
Alone

But i keep looking out the window
Void of connection,
Lack of direction
And I'm reminded of a world, that's passing me by

While the air is slowly thinning

And I often look at you and wonder,
How you can still breathe

Not moving forward, not moving at all

But you keep feeding that elephant
And I'm still starving

We were both waiting for eachother....
But neither one of us,
Really arrived
And I can't stay here anymore
Just to remain....
Idle

J. Hitchcock

Elliot Lake, sunset
Spread my blanket, press play
James Taylor, Fire and Rain
I always loved that song Now, a cruel irony
Cause, really, "I always thought that I'd see you again"

And so this is it....
Our last goodbye
Autumn is heavy in the air
Like a lost and sad  banshee
Her solemn hues, dusted everywhere

Seems like the sun is dropping faster now
Confronted with the unfair finality
Helplessly, I watch as it descends
A beautiful reminder, of our impending goodbye
"But if you want to leave, take good care"

Mr. Lightfoot serenades us
"Sundown, ya' better take care"

And the wind whispers through the  vibrant leaves,
of the forgotten birch trees
And I can't hear the songbirds anymore,
surrounded by a comforting stillness, but I have yet to accept,
....."I'm with your ghost again".....

-Judy Hitchcock Oct. 19

I rememeber driving on the highway that day
Cars passing - people with their busy lives
Windows down, music turned up
A million songs were playing, I heard them all
But for me, The Sound of Silence resonated 

I tried to remember the time
I felt like them...
Thinking of my tomorrows and my responsibilities
In an instant, I learned to "just-be" in the moment
I heard each lyric and the memories permeated, relentlessly 

I saw a little girl
Hanging out of a green pick up truck window
I envied the innocence and free-spirit, 
she instinctively conveyed
Unburdened by realitys' quiet presence

For a moment I felt the nostalgia of childhood 
The sweet smell of summer and the promise of "forever"
And when they took the next exit, our eyes met 
And we waved goodbye to eachother 
She'll never know the bittersweet taste she left in my mouth that day

J. Hitchcock

Where are you God
When they **** eachother in "Someone's" name
Their ticket to Heaven; a sick kind of fame
Do you not see our anguish and our impoverished souls
Christian, Atheist,  Muslim; we all have our roles

Where are you God
How can You "bless" some -with privileged lives
Or better yet, spare the mad -while the beautiful ones die
They say You saved them; You cut into "their dance"
How do people justify this;  with such arrogance

Where are you God 
In this horrific irony
Of a world replacing empathy with technology
The rich get richer thanks to the oppressed
Thats 1%  God.... why won't You "bless" the rest

Where are you God 
When a child gets washed upon the shore
I wonder how You can watch; and allow anymore
When a starving child is slowly waiting to die
And a vulture's waiting behind him; I need to know why
When thousands upon thousands are forced to flee
Have Your heart and eyes grown tired; is redemption not free

~J. Hitchcock

Familiar fingerprints grace its' sparkly glass mould
Through the ripples of alcohol; our story unfolds

All my tribulations; I'm too weak to face  by myself
Not without that bottle of scotch, on the same top shelf

And lately reflection seems to be a friend of mine
In these hollow corridors I've so often pined
This magical cocktail pairs well with regret
And bittersweetly I swallow; hoping to forget

Some day I will digest these deliciously painful memories
I'll rise to the occasion and shed these liquid accessories

All my tribulations; I hope to one day face by myself
And the dust will collect on that bottle; of a  (lonely) bottom shelf

~J. Hitchcock