I miss you
Not just because of our fight
or that we haven't talked since that night
I miss you
You smiling, you laugh
Worlds collapse, sometimes crash
My first memory of you, you stole my bike
From then on, brother for life
Through the ups and downs, we both made mistakes
But for me, you cant be replaced

I cant have our last fight be our last words
I cant have our last fight be our last

I wont except a world without you in it
My brother, my ride or die. please sit
I have things I need to apologize for
I broke promises I never thought I would before
I promised to always be there for you, I was not
At the end my rage is all you got
No explanation, no talking, I just threw you out the door

I promised I would always show you support, that night I fell further than short
I should have never just thrown you away like I did that night
What I did was not right
The way I treated you, as just barely a person
You messed up, but in that instant, I acted like stone

I cant say all that I feel
I do not blame you if you do not care

I would like one day to talk again
But it is up to you if and when

Ever feel like you're falling apart
Everything is broken and you don't know where to start
Voices in all directions
Full of predictions
No time to stop and rest
No time to take a breath
Picking up the pieces at the same time of breaking
Dropping each one because your hand cant stop shaking
Tears fill, its gone, the power of will
Crawling into your dark space
Because the reality you do not want to face
Where failure peaks
You have a voice, yet cannot speak
You are exhausted, yet cannot sleep
All thoughts trying to break free at once
Been building up for months
Your legs give out, hands fall to the ground
Does anyone care, did you even make a sound
Ever feel like you're falling apart
Everything is cracked and shattered
As if it never mattered

As she lays her head on the wall of strength
With her belly swollen with love
she thinks to herself "The place I am meant to be"
Cradling the baby of a dying love
Thoughts dissipate, the love has just started
With the feeling of this incredible human growing inside
Dads up high but not gone, smile don't cry
For he gave you a treasure nothing else compares
Even if your heart hurts beyond what you can bare
This child will come into a world with mountains of love
With wonderful stories of her father above
His memory to deep to take
His love will never break
your guardian Angel, your love from before
Hes watching you, even if you don't believe anymore

feelings are strong
like the switch has been turned on
demons are here, weapons are gone
drops come from the sky of pain
words are unspoken, the days are the same
walls are breaking, demons pushing threw
my guard is down, not sure what to do
waves of uncertainties find there way around
come to take my feet clear off the ground
as i float there in the midst of it all
in my ear, the wind starts to call
flowing my guilt from side to side
a rush of emotions, whimpering cries
my thoughts, my past, my mind in fact
these things have been scattered, my sense i lack

Drowning in the oceans of time
Like i'm in place while everyone is flying
Like i'm bleeding the sorrows of tomorrow
No one to help, no one to follow
The depths of time is everlasting
Harder than i thought, barely grasping
Like a broken clock has been replaced
Bitter life is what i taste
The oceans surround me in a whirl of deception
No life jacket, no protection
Water sprays in the crystal eyes of my past,
Holding onto every breath like it's my last
Water fills my lungs, everything starts to blur
****** into the current
Feeling every bump, every curve
From the bottom to the top
Everything's racing
All i want is for it to stop

It started off as butterflies
no reason. no answers to why
something meant to be very small
who would of guessed i would go and fall
a simple friend meant to be
now a wife is all i see
with eyes of passion flaring green
unlike anything i have ever seen
with a heart of gold i can understand
always there for a lending hand
no matter the problem no matter the time
you're right there to tell me it's going to be fine
with your heart beating loud against my ear
in your arms there is nothing to fear
with your smile your laugh and everything else
my feelings for you i have never truly felt
with every beat my heart speaks loud
i want to yell in the middle of the crowd
my heart was sore at first its true
there was another before i met you
she split my heart she tore it in two
but you have fixed it, its like its brand new
i have happiness in my mind happiness in my heart
who would have known this particular part
it started off as butterflies
no reason no answers to why

They say you have to love yourself before you can love someone else
Well i got a story to tell
Love for myself i don't think i have ever had
But being in love, i got that bad
Thinking of myself and what i need is not my first thought
When it comes to what gets done, for everyone else i have brought
At the end my hands are empty but everyone else is fine
Blistered and bruised, but yet still no cry
They say you need to love yourself to be free
But that coincides with the first, see when i am with her i am free
Free of having to love myself because she loves me enough
Free of having to go on without her, because god knows that would be rough
Free of all the world has to offer
Nothing can compare, don't even bother
They say you need to love yourself to keep on keepin' on
But as long as i see her there is no fog
As long as she is by my side i don't need me
As long as she is by my side, life is let be
This story may not make sense to most but its whats on my mind
Trying to get my feelings out, writing is how i search and find