Friends, and
Family
Everywhere......

I feel their every stare.....
The worst of which
I can barely bear.    
My reflection
Won't make eye connection with me anymore...
Blood .
..shot eyes.  
Snot ,tears ......
Blubbering.
Convulsive inhaling.....
Worst case scenarios
On repeat .
I'm up braiding the pain caused by me tuning it inwards to pay Penance
This is all the things I've done wrong marathon
Staring me as the morrow
I'm the only one invited .....
No one sees the pain
I hide it everyday thinking this surely means I'm a good man......
Ironically since Noone sees
Me Bleed internally
They assume I haven't changed a thing.......this why evey mistake made is to the world not a big deal
To me it's everthing...
It's devastating

I can still feel you.....
I still hear your laugh
You are still the one
Everyone wishes
They could have.....
You are still .....
The one
Apothecary salve
You soothe my soul
The emollient
smoothes and removes

All my muck and uglies.
Somehow You give me empathy...
For those who bruised me...
For  with you they can see
How beautiful I am ....
And now they envy
The one Everyone
Wishes They had......
You ......
The one who's in love with the thought of being in love..
Me who is perpetually
In love with you only...
your love makes me whole......
Ampersand.......
You elevate me to King ...
All masculine
Top of the world .....
No hands .
..
You make me .....
Wanna be a better  Man.
........
Don't read.....
"Don't read this forgemeknot" on collection  page...color.......

You will find your heart .....
And behave differently
.......
Then everything be still.  
And quiet.    
Urgencies and emergencies
Fade to oblivion.....
All Lilliputs strings....
Slip away tickling
Leaving you tingling
You feel connected
But not bound .
Not afraid to commit a faux pas or mak a loud sound...
Liberated your free .....
Alone you no longer feel lonely
My love will hold and protect you .......
Although you have me
You're security burgeoning
No more need to submit .
This I will not allow you to do.
...
Yet listen to"sunshine superman "
By
Donavan .
Then commit
Or
Not...
It's up to you boo
Either way you are unique
All clichés aside.  .....
You are one In a billion
Completely changed my point of view .......
Yes I really would stop the world an melt with you.....
I'd walk the streets of pain Grrrl ....
8 million times for you....
I never dreamed I'd meet somebody like you.......
At night I wake up with my sheets soaking wet .....
With a freight train running through my head....
I know random quotes from songs ist like anything
But original.......
But read beginning to end
Again ......you just did your already beginning to forget
What hinders you now read again ........
You already did.....now you under my love spell
Don't read again or you'll never wanna leave me......
Sup2uboo!
012357911. 13.  17192329

Powers out better part of the day ...
Currently staring at the ceiling
Racked by  the cracking ...
The creaking .......
Heart stabbing  slapping
of my stupid screen door.......
Relentless driving wind.  ....
Hell bent on getting in........
Wearied .....
A little worried......
And then ..............
My phone just died
It's 1........13...AM.....
I'm alone..
I'm hearing things .......
Scratching.......whisky throated whisperings.... scuffling........
Morbid moans.....
Bone chilling symphony from
The wailing cathedrals of woe......
Finally there's no more...
  of  the tap tap tapping on the widow.......
Which took all my will to ignore .....
Footsteps on the roof ........
Crash and thud........
Outside my front door.......then like a slow metronome
The pounding ....
Slurring painful groans
At first incoherent...
I SCREAM "
LEAVE ME ALONE ....
THIS IS MY HOME ....."
I begin to understand ...
And I creep across the living room floor .....
It's saying" open the door ,
It's love and the reapers right behind me let me in.........
Finally I can take it no more ....
Butcher knife in hand ....
I rip open the door....
..
And there is nothing more.......
Nothing more than a mirror with me in it........alone and lonely
Except for ........behind me
I can see
A reflection of the SABOTEUR....
The REAPER.......
Shoving a butcher knife in my back .
In retrospect
I  flash back on my relationships of the past
...and it's me .......
Self sabotaging

And the lights come on .....
Metaphorically......
Like an EPIPHONE.

Too fast .....



.........
????????????




Now I'm thinking.....
.......
....
.  
Is it ......
Or is it  knot .....
A good thing

Let me let you....
Fall in
And then......... .
Thank you I got this ....
Ill take it from here......

Without histoy...
Who should believe...
Surely not us....
Within what we say
We feel is veracious....
Unfortunately  what people
See.....
Won't allow them to feel that way
Your character is always there before you...  .
It wears what it has to
Not what you tell it too.....
Its usually what someone said about you......