My little home with its little desk
juxtaposed with my big desire to live deeply in my skin
and just cherish this
this
these tiny hands
this, this real and very precious life
this that is me
is cherished
I start with this
this me
this growing, stumbling
precious being
this me
that extends to this precious cherished you

Who knows if it would be advantageous
if I could shake it off like a dog this cold wet sorrow
that shows up
who knows
if I ask a child
they might indeed
will give me wise and honest counsel
(maybe they know)
the simplest answer
could be buried under a mountain
of fears, of conditioning, and adult foolishness

the solution might be simple

Tender I sit at the side of the road
this lane that house
the many people that live in tents or sleeping bags in subway stations
the youthfulness
the way I cannot close this hatch
the way I cry when I see someone else cry

the way I say no and hold my ground even when they tell me
I must not be honest “speak like a politician” the ways in which they find me wild are the ways in which I refuse to refuse my own heart and soul

I sit tender at the side of the road

My heart rests languid and full of sorrow
I could never read his mind

and he never shared his thoughts
and I circled like a bird over and over
over and over

dizzy and dizzy
and dizzy with my unrequited love

never did he allow me to land

Someday you gotta take a wild chance on you
Stop  looking at only the negative
make neurological pathways to condition in you the positive
everyone deserve a life that can be loving, light and beautiful
despite the loss, the uncertainty and the impermanence

Today, or tomorrow,
or whenever you are ready take a wild chance on you

If you tender world can soften
I can soften
into this fragile living and dying existence

I can soften when I reach the edges of myself and meet my limit and my doubts
I can soften when my hands want to grasp tomorrow or reach back towards the past

I can soften and sit with everything within me

We can soften to our humanity
we can soften into our beauty
we can soften into our imperfection
and become more loving
simply by meeting the edges and softening
softening
softening and taking one step over the water

If you can soften
I can soften
into this

I can soften when I reach the curb
and meet my floating sorrow at the surface of the lake
I can soften when my hands want clench and have them remain open
I can soften and sit with everything inside  me

We can soften to our warm trust
we can soften into the best version of ourselves
we can soften into our the knowing nothing is certain  
and become more loving
simply by meeting the edges and softening
softening
softening and taking another step over the water and softening