go the distance, take a cab,
pay the tolls and mark my words,
i'm not asking for a lot, just go,
and make sense of what you have.
take for granted, but grant me the
serenity to accept what i cannot change,
you, remember how my shoes feel -
and something tells me, you don't want
to change for anyone - i wouldn't bid on it,
but at least i'll drive up the price.

holding me or holding back,
haven't got the time for that,
pick a side and stick to it,
or to me, autonomously
you decide your fate, and
i've been both faithful and
revered for knowing when
to call a ***** a *****,
but i'm so secure in myself
that i don't want sympathy,
except for yours, so just have me.
sometimes i wonder if i'm
worth holding on to,
but at least i say it all,
can't you see i'm see through?

******* in knots, and
silky smooth, just
me, myself, and you,
a pack of Cottage Springs,
hungover willful mornings,
and all the words between.
we’ve met a hundred times,
i’ve died a thousand deaths,
but still i introduce you,
to all the parts i’ve left -
the girl with shiny dreams,
actress as it seems - scientist of
feeling, no absolutes, some truths,
dramatic, and quiet at the seams,
a stinging people pleaser, pleasure
in a box, i can cry, i can gleam;
i don’t know anything,
just me, myself, and you,
silky smooth, and
i’m ******* in knots.

you left me on the corner of
mistreated and mishandled,
stone cold cobble stone for
a heart and clicked heels,
tossing a **** on the ground,
only to throw out my feelings,
pushing passion in the name of
whatever suits you -
and it hurts you to see me now.

have a good summer without me,
man without dryer sheets, stinking,
singing in the alley behind truth,
something you stumble over still.
did you ever even notice me?
how i spin for you, knotting together
reason and feelings for answers.
you search for half empty cups
on your side of the bed - and say
i’m too good for you, that
you’ll always be this way - so
have a good summer without me,
knowing that’s the only truth
you’ve ever told me.

I will enjoy this life. I will bite into
the overripe bananas, the in-season
strawberries, and remain impartial.
I will not worry about the tempers,
the Karen in the Niagara Dominos,
weeds that daunt our growth,
we can choose to love past this.
I will stir the *** of doubt, and
balance salt and sugar in style.
Burning insults, when I call myself an
ironic idiot, both brilliant and broken
pushing open the pull doors,
we can choose to live past this.
I will enjoy this life. I will bite into
the frozen mango, wait for pain, like
a slow elevator, and remain impartial.

if you take all my sheets off,
& say the worst things in the dark
i can learn to find some rest, knowing
i won‘t love you any less.
even when i’m mad and blue,
and say the same things back to you,
pack your things and leave a mess
knowing, i won’t love you any less.
& when i hold on much too tight and
cling to all the what-if/mights,
even when you don’t pass my tests,
i won’t love you any less.
if you forget how i feel and turn
away to something “real”,
i hope you’ll remember how i felt, but
i won’t love you any less, i guess,
because of all the ways i’ve loved,
and all the ones that i let run,
i take a breathe, and beat my chest, cause
i won’t love you any less.