Is it just me or do the walls shift
tumble under me
Sway beneath my toes
No matter how stable I know I am
I'm helpless to the instability
Though i'm safe in my awareness
no one else stumbles

My world is a washing machine
secure in theory
unsteady in reality
the timer ticks away
cleaning away my youth
preparing me
for when the walls finally stop
along with my heartbeat

Coins in my pocket rattle
asking for my help
asking to be embraced

Coins in my pocket cry
thinking of peoples distaste for them
so large in number yet small in worth

Coins in my pocket smile
when pulled out into the light
only to be placed into another pocket

Coins in your pocket rattle
asking for your help
from the all too familiar shape of a pocket

I hear the speaker tell the crowd "Each of you is unique"
I hear the sounds of the people who know it to be true

I am deaf to those sounds
I am not one of those people
I am not the Cinderella
The lost orphan
The Dimond in the rough

How can I be unique, with my face on another
how can I be the princess
with my throne built for two

Always depicted as evil
always depicted as inseparable

The same classes
Same friends
Same birthday
Same birthday gifts

Everyone wants to be different
but everyone already is

What if you were half of a whole

What if you were treated
like half of a whole

I would know
I am an identical twin
I am strung to another

by face
by name
by age
by voice
by mind
by DNA
by misconception

constantly compared to her
constantly responsible for her

constantly wishing
I wasn't half of a whole

I lay in my bed
faced at my ceiling
the wood boards face down at me
theirs eyes watch me
but seem not to care
each line is unique
curving however they wish
they move like i do in my dreams
freely
unattached to ideals and standards
their shadows don't follow them
like mine to me
the grain comforts me
it keeps me awake
but helps me sleep
i feel safe when under it's scrutiny
and calm under its uniformity

april showers bring may flowers
but these long hours
are breaking my towers

as they crumble
I see my heart tumble
into your hands, looking so humble

but wait,

you built those towers
with my hand in yours
so graciously asking
for nothing but my love

as they crumble
I see my heart tumble
into your hands, that I trust with my heart