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mt Aug 2011
These words
Will never be the same.
Before you can blink
They'll rewire your brain
mt Aug 2011
Nothing worse than flushing it away
To see that it floats
To see that it stays

Nothing worse than toothbrush on tongue,
To sense that it's there -
it isn't done

Nothing worse than when you're trying to get clean,
and you're smacked in the face with the taste,
of failed hygiene.
mt Aug 2011
He's on the outside
Deep within the confines,
Inside his own mind
Mind-expanding from pole to pole
What he touches, what he feels.
What's real?

He consumes
Straw, in the Earth's core,
******* to taste and see
He tries navigate with soul
Navigating his world,
a world away from me

He took my world from me,
My world
in his blood stream
I can hear the screams

He's hemmed in by societies that can never know him
Looking on the scarred skin, superficiality
Try to explain his fatal peculiarity
Societies can't walk in his world,
Never walk within his skin
They can understand pyschology and try to explain,
But he can't feel their pain
No human instinct works that way

He took my world from me
My world's in his head
My world is dead.

Should we freeze him in ice?
Looking at a freak show
of glassy horror
A blank face, behind the make-up
we don't know

It's no animalistic, atavistic base place,
There's no human instinct that can explain.
How he walked our world, but ran a different race,

Alien, Upside down, The wrong way round, This ****** up clown
His inhuman race finds a place when a switch flicks the wrong way in a brain
There's no way to explain,
That he doesn't understand your pain
He ****** your world into his sick **** circus,
Feeding innocence to the Lions,
across lines that in his mind
just aren't

Once,
He was innocence,
There is no innocence,
There are no lines
A clown,
Without laughter,
No sense
There is just sensation,
Just living,
A clown without laughter,
Living and fighting,
natural disaster

A straw in the Earth's core,
My world is never safe
The world at individual war


He took my world from me,
My world
in his blood stream
I can hear the screams

He took my world from me
My world
In their eyes,
closed to passing time

He took my world from me
My world
inside his head

They died.

My world is dead.
This was a response to an atrocious taking of innocent life by pure psychotic madness. In retrospect I feel it's a little simplistic, but I like some of the sounds.
mt Aug 2011
Memories haunt me,

Macabre slideshows,

In my mind



They twist and taunt me

The happiness,

That’s lost in time



The future looms

It’s soon to be,

Trapped within my memory



If it’s good I feel at ease

The outlook’s bright,

I smile.



Else I’m down

Upon my knees,

I drown in self denial.
2006 *then*
mt Aug 2011
My World feels so small
As I am trapped by these walls
And the shutters are closed
And the ceiling, it falls

The scale of the tiredness
Far past,
the last resort
Has been growing
And growing
As the world will distort

Relativity takes a hit

The room tightens its grip, clenching
It’s crushing my bed
A vice of the void,
There’s no space in my head

The crunching timbers steal my breath
And crush what life they still can find
But I will wake, to live bereft
These cruel chains, are in my mind
2007 *then*
mt Aug 2011
You my cure,
a painkiller, a drug?
Delirious consumption.

Being around you
Let me forget
From thought, to happiness
I immersed myself in you
But the illness progressed

No plateau
No recreation,
As I sipped your words and tongue,
I was slipping
Sliding your syringe
Piercing, my skin
Everyday, of every week
The obsession would spiral,
But never peak

And everyday was a day away,
From the antidote I seek

I stole the timbers of my life
To fuel the fire of my addiction
And as everything crumbled,
And became less
My illness still progressed

I lit it,
And it flamed,
My pyre

But the beauty of your fire-lit face,
Engulfed my world,
And left me higher

What is the difference between love and addiction?
So little, but love seems the greater affliction.
2007 *then*
mt Aug 2011
1) The world scorns me
Without reason
No Blood, upon my hands

The guilt destroys me,
Without reason,
Thoughts fight, sense disbands

I am spinning
in the mist,
and Catching
glimpses as I twist

As spectres
smother my existence
Hiding joy
and warping distance,

Trivialities
are manifest
Drunk on self importance,
dressed
Clinically,
and all in white
Anaesthetists,
I feel no light.

Hold me now and show me
sense
I need a frame
of reference,

Joy, at times, will follow,
after
Let me know and
show me laughter

Show me love,
And tell me if,
Asking why’s
A dangerous gift.

*

2) We can never be free
Or unshackle the chain
Of cause,
and effect

We are never free
From the consequences
Of our actions,
unless

We break free
from our mind’s archives
Of shame,
and unrest
2006 * then *
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