I'm splitting
Cracking
Falling apart
Tightly wrapping masking tape around the cracks in my mind
Telling myself out loud
over and over and over again
"You will be alright, just be alright"
While my sub conscious screams at me to run run run
I think I am just cold
And that's why I'm shaking
But it's a lie I tell myself to keep from staring the truth in the face:
I'm breaking
Mentally
Emotionally
But I can't think that,
so
I'm cold
Wrap the tape tightly, maybe this time it will hold better
Don't delve into the actual problem,
{what problem? There's no problem!}
Don't try to fix it
{hey, you are okay, you have it good! Quit thinking there is an issue, you are being dramatic}
Push it down, deep deep down, don't let it surface.
Lock up these negative emotions.
You can fix cracks with tape, right?
But these aren't cracks, they are fault lines and my earth is shaking and moving, breaking these open and no amount of tape is ever going to stop it.
Hush hush hush
You are fine you are okay.
You are fine
You are okay