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Denxai Mcmillon Jan 2016
I've learned the value of life
I've fought long enough to be a veteran
I've grown weary of the front lines.
I've grown into something few would recognize.
I fight for what's right
Not a superhero of any kind.
I'm here to replace the guns with chess pieces.
I'm replacing swords with water balloons.
I'm taking into consideration the feelings of others.
I've far surpassed the days of violent anger.
Live and let live.
Live and let live.
Be kind
Love strong.
Denxai Mcmillon Jan 2016
I wouldn't call myself spiritual.
I'm agnostic for the most part
With a lot of atheist anger
It's hard to believe in what I can't see
I can't believe in man either
So call it what you will
I'm a heretic
I'm a sinner
I'm sacrilegious
All I know is that
I am God
And God is alive in all I touch and see
I can not believe in a bearded man in space
But I can believe in myself.
I can believe that I can help
I can believe I can lend an ear
I can lend a hand
I can become the merciful God
That I have always wished was there.
We are all gods with our own reach.
So if there is a real God looking over me,
I'm not sorry.
My body is my temple
And I need not sheep to worship it.
I will worship myself.
Denxai Mcmillon Jan 2016
You feel like you're ripping at the seams.
You feel like all the scary stuff
That you hid
behind those shattered glass eyes
will spill endlessly onto the floor,
make you a laughing stock,
And
Be the reason you must become a recluse.
This my dear,
Is in fact,
Untrue.
Behind the seams
You are no monster to be cast,
in a closet,
Under the bed,
Under the stairs,
In the attic
Or
In some makeshift storage space.
No
No
Behind those seams
Is a beautiful mosaic
Of the beer bottles you've shattered
Of the mirrors you've cursed to shards
Of the glasses you've cast to the floor
Behind the seams is nothing to be hidden away.
You are art.
You are;
the most beautiful,
The most intricate
The most complex
The most awe inspiring
Piece ever put together.
Yes,
Blood was shed to get you here.
Sure,
Sometimes when I try and help
To place your glass
I get cut on your sharp edges.
I do not regret taking my blood
Mixing it with your love
And
Guiding you to decide
To decide to pull the fabric,
hiding your beauty,
away
I'll be here holding seam cutters
to hand you.
I'll save a spot
Atop the mountains
In every studio
On every city street
In every single home
To display your heart.
You may feel broken
You may feel shattered
You may feel that you're worthless
But in every piece of you
that you think is meaningless
I will show you
You don't need to be who you were
To be something beautiful.
For my beloved moonflower.
You are not alone and you're not in anyway unfit for the dazzling of the world you exist in. Head to toe, heart to soul I love you. It's late and I'm taking you in as you sleep. Goodnight.
Denxai Mcmillon Jan 2016
I love you.
It's so simple to say
Harder to prove
And
That's okay.
I love you.
For the kind soul you have
For the limitless love behind those eyes
For the way you radiate grace.
I love you.
I want to tank you
for helping me bring my brother some peace of mind from a really bad high.
I want to thank you for being by my side to help me keep my cool.

I love you.
So much.
I want to thank you for letting me see when you get grumpy
Or angry
Upset
Disheartened.
Being let in by you is an honor.
I want to thank you for loving the beaten, broken man I was.
I want to thank you for helping me stand when I'm too drunk.
Or
When I'm so emotionally distraught that I collapse.
I love you.
I am truly
Truly
Thankful for you.
Thankful for your patience
Thankful for your forgiveness
Thankful that there is an us.
Thank you.
Denxai Mcmillon Jan 2016
How am I to help
When I can not tell you no
I am so sorry.
Denxai Mcmillon Jan 2016
It's weird; being here.
I'm here to support the woman I love.
I'm here willingly and happily
Soon it will be my turn
Soon I'll be fixing myself
But as of right now the TV plays pbs shows.
And the old Asian woman sitting across from me has been eyeing me up and down.
Reminding me that back where I was conceived,
I'll never be accepted.
Just like I'll never be accepted in my home country
Denxai Mcmillon Jan 2016
I see the ache in your eyes
I see, saw and will see it
As long as I'm by your side.
I will never know what happened behind the doors
I'm not sure if I want to.
To leave you that sense of privacy
Or
Maybe it's because me not knowing
Is the only thing keeping him alive;
Nevertheless, I have a few things to give you.
Not words of advice.
Not words to tell you in which way you should live.
Words of who you truly are.
You are as beautiful as my hair is unruly.
You are as gentle as the moons light.
You are as kind as a lioness
You hold the power of the same lioness
You love deeply
You are so important.
Not only to me.
To your mother
To your sisters
To the brothers you find in my family.
To the sisters you find in my family
To the father you find in my family
Scratch that "my"
And replace it with "our"
I love you.
I love the person you are
Faults
And
All.
You don't have to carry the weight alone.
I'll carry half.
And when you're too tired to continue
I'll carry your half and you.
I love you.
You are more valuable than any gem
You are more valuable than any stone
You are valuable.
Never forget
You are loved.
On your darkest days
On your brightest nights
Drunk
High
Somewhere inbetween.
You are loved.
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