What's the point in eating if everything is bland and sounds gross?
What's the point in trying if no one cares?
What's the point in loving if they don't feel the same?
What's the point in following the rules if you still get in trouble?
What's the point In preparing for activities if they're going to be canceled?
What's the point in caring if you're only going to get hurt?
What's the point in living if no one would miss you if you died?

"I love you"
"Yeah"
And with that simple exchange you've ripped my heart out

Catholics.
The outcast Christians.

You
You drive me nuts
All I can do is think of you
And how you so easily control me

I pride myself on being independent
But all you do is look at me
And craving your control
I become yours

Craving your hand on my throat
Your marks on my body
The immobility from your control
Your body pressed against me

I must feel your bite on my skin
You pulling my hair
Your hands roaming my body
Your breath on my chest

I must hear you say "mine"
The quit sound of undoing my bra
Your sigh of approval as you look at me
Your breathing next to my ear

I must see you smile at me
The pride in your face for having me
The relaxed version of you
The controlling you

You make me crazy
But I'm addicted
I must have more
You

Love
It's a strange feeling
It makes you do funny things

It makes you risk missing work
because they are sick and need comfort

It makes you stay up late
because they need to talk about stress at work

It makes you smile
because a friend said that name

It makes you change your life
because you want them to love you too

It's a strange feeling
It makes you do crazy things
Love

"Smile!"
"One big happy family!"
"Pretend you love each other!"

These cheery phrases
Repeated over and over
As family portraits are taken

They all sound harmless
Until you think about them
Think about what they mean

Raised in a Catholic family
Taught that lying is wrong
Yet you tell me
"Pretend you love each other!"

This family is not happy
This family is full of
Hate, pain and sorrow
Yet here we are
One big happy family

Here I am
Curled up enveloped in nausea
Shivering from a fever on your couch
Tears in my eyes

There you are
The concern in your eyes
Running your fingers through my hair
Trying to help me relax

It wasn't the perfect moment
But it was wonderful just the same
It was a glimpse into a life with you
And I hope I get to have more
Little imperfect moments with you