Finger across that new love
force her breath in deep
Watch the dilation of
her ink across her eyes seep

Arm folding over and again
the smell of hot rain
Pulling within the fixation
an ache without the pain

Your leg, her waist
Her face, your pace.
She arches, you squeeze
Your palms, her knees.

An anger that bursts a flower
Raging sea of sheets and nails
All the hairs that salute the power
Unfurling to her exhale.

In the bed of reason
laid my head aloft
too far in the sky
the pendulum too soft

the secondary bang
the chime that comes too soon
somehow now too woolen
it's sways  now too mute

A distance grew between
my hands and my chest
resting my fingers now
upon a foreign nest

Think of something beautiful!
It'll sooth the pain
of all the places I wandered
your face lights again

Endings are made up
no such thing exists
move but one more thought
and the burning love persists

Expression does not conjure what is needed
the delicacy of what I feel cannot be sown
the thread too light, the light too bright
what I know, I fear cannot be known

The tender flowing of you to me
that channelling, that freedom of being
only in your presence can I not suffer myself
For I only see you and nothing else.

If in your skin could I
climb into and have a word
An honest word
about what really matters
I would ask you...
                                                Does it hurt to love?
                                                And is it enough?
                                                Does it tear you apart
                                                knowing that I'm on the outside
                                                and you are on the inside
                                                and until we die
                                                we can't be as one?
Does it hurt to love?
to feel my lips so close
to collapse under my gaze
and know that you cannot
taste what I taste
or be more than your own reflection
of what I can see?
                                               Does it hurt to love?
                                               when you hold my hand
                                               and know that unless
                                               we both die right now
                                               we will one day
                                               Have to let go?
If so, then welcome home.

The wavering mystical man decided to carry his bag to the place he knew so well
                                           his chair that sits like an indivisable, inseparable part of his living room
that is the centre of his universe and the warm of his comforts
                                            he decided most days to relish in his most cozy of cushions
but today was a special day, he had used his soft scarf and his well worn hat
                                it was the day for the mink blanket oh yes. Next to the fire that lights his happy face.
In his heart, chocolate melts, in his eyes, champagne is spilt.
                                the book shelves flicker with a giggle in their pages
the stove top quietly whistles, twisting with the most delightful smells
                                      The rain outside, drumming to his hum, his feet kicking and tapping his thumb
its all okay, alone and happy to be, the chair, the man, his blanket and his tea.

Whisper goodbye my love,
                               for the words will hurt too much to say.
I know we have had a world together
         seen the globe together
                              and watched each other grow like doves.
Beautiful outstretched wings,
                               ready to take to the sky.
But my darling, our embrace
                               no longer fills my eyes with life.
I long to long for you,
                               and close my eyes so tight,
but the truth has looked our way
                            she smiles a sad smile full of tears
Everything inside me yearns to change
                         to feel what I could for another, for you
            
     but its the stars baby,
              you don't see them and I do.
                         We will never see life through the same view.

Kiss me or not, its sort of just fine.
I want to call you twice a day
sometimes you don’t talk very much
I linger so you will see my good side
but I often forget
that you can see me.

Inside me there's a little world
it touches yours by a little door
of words and touch
I miss you when you shower
or when you dream
but missing you is just fine.

All the filler words are kind of funny
when you line them up.
None of it really matters
its just for fun. Weird fun.

In the end, if you see yourself,
the way that I see you
A beautiful living being
then kiss someone else I don’t mind.
Its worth it.

You Mr Rabbit are or so nice
I could drink tea with you
and talk about rice
or melons,
growing in the summer sun
but Mr Rabbit, I couldn't *******.

Dear Mr Rabbit, sorry to be calling so late
I feel like we left off on a bad foot
the carrots still hot on my plate
as you pointed
towards your rounded door
and asked me kindly to scoot.

No I understand it was rude
and that we have had a delightful eve
but, hmm, how do I conclude
you're lovely
and sweet as a bug
but I can't see us making out on that rug.

No please don't be offended!
Your ears are so soft to touch
and your eyes are to be commended
but, sexually
the lightning and fire
well, doesn't amount to much.

I bid you adeu, Mr Rabbit.
Our time together was truly splendid
but it must be said,
that without the waistcoat
you remind me an awful lot of my bed.

It carries me through an underworld of sorrow
And spits me out onto a plane made of grass
Here I look up into a night full of light
And breathe a song into my heart

All this wonder, all these eyes
How could I stop at just one?
In my centre, I yearn for permission
To love so many, as many as will fit

What I never realised until this moment
Is that its vast and endless
I can love you all, more intensely than just one
I need to love you all, or become undone.

When it all collapses, oh and it will
whether by choice or by death
you will face, that limtilessness.

The expansion will begin
and end in one swift swing
caressing all that you thought you knew
and gently whiping it away

your memories will seem a mist
stories of nothingness
the entrance towards the bliss

The body barely kept together
exploring and expanding in all directions
together we will see, and only then.

Come and let go.

Wavers it does,
sanity.
It's not so secure,
no.
The spaces between,
the going and the went.
Elongate
sometimes.

Trembles and expands,
the light
in all things.
Stretching my mind
to its limits,
where logic
withers.

Fear saluted at first
the go to
when things are new.
But actually,
this trickling mess
of unknowningness
allows me
to be.

It begins.
Then ends.
At the new beginning.

Why do I choose to suffer my freedom?
   Is it familiarity? A self-created religion?

I bind myself, to myself, using my own hands.
  I struggle to look through my own fingers.

Is it because I can't see? Am I in a dream?
  Where is the edge? Where is the seam?

I pretend to be distressed and myself believe
  Its all I've ever known, the stories of someone.

I carry on, holding tight, writing more lies
  A twisted *******, an inversion of life.

I catch glimpses of release, the gaps in my hands
  Yet as soon as I forget, I go back in.

How can you fight something you've created?
  How destroy the already annihilated?

Nothing but questions, answers are worthless.
  Nothing makes sense, not even these verses.

I decided that it was time.
It’s as simple as that
just closed my eyes.
It was dark.

The thoughts that intruded
seemed but a hum
just closed my mind
it was strange.

With full conviction
I walked out of myself.
just around my room
until I was ready.

The dream had begun
the halls flicked with mist
I inched in anticipation
to the front door.

The door revealed
or was it my mind?
A purple world
my coloured canvas.

I chose to make the sun rise
but found it to dim
so I rose another, his brother
and exploded him.

The light shattered me
my heart in awe
Knowing without a doubt
I created what I saw.

It seeps into my body like an invisible ink
following all the misleading signs of my mind.
I try not to listen to its absurdities
I try not to be afraid if they are true.
But I can’t help but wonder
Do they know something I don’t?

My logic often gets in the way,
constantly in disarray.
I beg my heart to listen to my head.
My head tells my heart to listen up good.
But my heart...

That cavity in my chest that brings me so much unrest.
It makes me cower in its power. It owns me
Something deep inside.
A force so abundant I struggle to hide.

It knows.
Everything.
I can feel it.
And is wrenching me apart.

Its not enough.
Doesn't fill my veins with the right kind of blood.
Its too thin,
Pleasures of this kind of life leave me slain.
I would rather have pain, intense pain.
Than this normal feeling.  

Life is not meant to be a stroll
but a panicked tumble into the unknown.
Full of wonders and delight and confusion
and well I don’t even know

I would love to open my eyes
Really really wide
See what is right in front of me.
What my heart can see and I now I bleed.

My hands caress a body that is controlled.
But inside lays such a storm.
It is scratching on the walls of my skin.
It sends messages through the breath going out and in.
It allows little whispers to flow through my heart to my head.

Unless you are totally alive then you are part dead.

Its rewindable you know
time.
You've been fed lies.
You want to know how?
It takes time.

First, decide whether
you really know
what it is?
Then once you do
go back
and think some more

you will realise
its nothing more
than a measure
of change
and you want to change
that change

well then, logically.
whatever you change now
is changing
what happened then
What? no!

maybe?
How do you know?

It all became a void
as i fell backwards
endlessly
among the rocks that chimed
I told myself
"ive been here before"
and allowed myself to fall

It seemed to go on endlessly
tumbling, not breathing.
I was sure this was it
the end of something
but
just before the surrender
the moment of death
I faltered
I was afraid

The layer upon layer
that seemed to then become
a dream I could not wake from
kept running, fleeing.
Looking for the door
that has all the light
or dark

Even now, someone smirks
"you are still dreaming"
I laugh and agree
how would i know the difference?

Dismember the sky
removing all its cherished guides
Under your thumb, blacken,
the controller of the tides.

Moving onto the illuminaters
that race with fire and tail,
blowing out its sparkling heart,
never again to see its trail.

Finally turning towards the one
the closest to our skin
Trample his shining glory,
enter the nightmare of unawaking.

Now blinking in your darkness
I want you to reach out and find
that one hand that forever waits
even when life has hurt you blind.

What lies in your eyes
are the lies that I despise
doesn't come close
transparent as a politician
yet I still listen
in hope that my optimism
can twist it
into something I can believe.

Your smile can erase
every trace
of my abiding detestation
for something as smile
for a moment
for a while.

I trust the haze I feel
the curtains which in my heart
only absorb the light
in my mind
I know there is only the devastation
of your cold night.

Of all the things,
I could do.
I choose the one way
I can’t go
Its always that
Little grasp further

That little breath more
That little horizon deeper

And so I search
Endlessly for that thing
That will begin
The end of suffering
I yearn to feel
That intensity alive
That fire of life
That enveloping bite

It carries on and on
There is no fill
There is no song

Its all just another hole
That leads away
From my soul

I need that real kiss
I need that true bliss
I can’t stand this

Let me feel it.

Some days when the skies cloud over
We don't know what to do
Should we give up or carry on
Or move to somewhere new?

If we always wanted summer
Forever we would roam
And the closer we got to the sunshine
The further we'd be from home

The sooner that we learn
To see the seasons through
The closer we'll become
There lives eternal sun...

Swirling
    
      within
          
           the
  Spiral

of

  Silence.

My feelings invade
all crevices in my body,
Nothing mattered any more.
But the
       flowing
              ache.

Nothing hurts, yet nothing doesn't.
  Confusing
       deluding
Misused use of words and touch
how can I forget?
how could I let
      myself

       fall
       into

the arms of
    
nothing.