What hurt the most
Was that fact that
I hurt you

When what you’ve been through doesn't quite qualify
When you can’t explain it because its that unique
When you want help but are to worried you dont deserve it
When you don’t know how to ask
How do i know?

sleep is scarce
now that i have said
those things
to you
i cannot explain
I'm scared
of you

Sometimes i wish
I wish we could do this
I wish we could be
I wish you would be
I wish upon a stupid star
I hope upon an ugly jar
And these things
In their peace have made my day worse
Because wishes don’t come true
Dreams too

Do you know how hard it is
To start with nothing
No confidence
No innocence
Stolen so young
You dont even remember a time before
How hard it is to rebuild yourself
When you were never even together
Relapse over and over
Without know how to be happy
Without knowing how to be okay
Without realizing your depressed
You didn't even know what the word
meant
When you never thought you would make it to 10
Let alone 14
Do you know how hard that is?

My finger on the trigger
Aiming at someones head
What if I’m the target

My eyes look
And all i can do is see
The demon sits on my chest
It plays with my hair
As tears roll
My brain wonders whats happening
My mind screams
But my mouth doesnt even open
My arms want to flail
But i can barely feel them
So im stuck
With a demon on my chest
And tears in my ears
Then i close my eyes
i can’t bare this anymore
Then i jump awake
And the demon is gone
I can move my limbs
And then i start to sob
i cant sleep anymore

Our lives are so awful
Our lives so lawful
We all think we need to be accepted
Instead of thinking we should be connected  
Hi. My name is unworthy to meet you
I’m too blue
Hi. My name is stereotyped
You can see the words I’ve typed
Hi. My name is gone
I’m not a con

Our deaths are so celebrated  
Our lives so hated
We all want something  
It feels like nothing
Hi. My name is dead
I’ll rest in my bed

My sorrows will drown me
Don’t you see
The water that surrounds me
I’m in over my head  
You can see the dead
My life went to waste
It left no trace
My skin will burn  
You cannot earn  
A life to be
My life to me

The way you make me feel
I should go  
Steal your heart  
Keep it just out of reach
Take it away if you find it  
Just so you know  
How I felt
When I met you

Sometimes it’s really hard to be calm
With voices yelling at you
Inside and out
With people telling you things
Telling you how to act
Telling you how to feel
It really makes it hard to stay calm

Thats another thing they tell you
Chill! It’s fine!
But you know
You know
Its not

So if i show up one day
And I’m completely fine
I don’t care about anything
And I'm just overall cool
Know that i lost a fight
With myself
And you won’t see me tomorrow

Unknown
My identity is unknown
Now i know you know
Who’s behind this show
But i have to say even if you know
You dont
You dont know me
If only
You could see
The real me

I’m sorry to yell
I’m sorry to scream
I’m not quite well
So it seems

I’m sorry to say
I’m sorry today
I’m screaming
But you’re still beaming

Can you even hear me
Singing this song of three
Don’t worry it’s fine
It’s all mine

I feel like you should know
This isn’t for show
Can you hear thee
If I speak of centuries

Will you hear me

Ive never felt this way before
Ive fallen in love once
I dont think ill ever fall out of that one
But even then i never felt
The way you make me feel
You make me wanna do cheesy stuff
Like buy you flowers
And hold your hand
And kiss your forehead
And buy you chocolates
I dont know why
I have to admit
im scared of falling in love
But you make me wanna confront my fear
And stand up
And shout from the roof tops
I love you

Im scared of the night
I know thats not right
How do i say
Its not just the day
So many what ifs
So many what about this
All those compromises
Im getting tired of this
I’d rather be knocked out
Than live this out
I cant take this anymore
The night is no more