Codes bode mechanical roles,
On human souls,
A road that promised rainbows,
And virtues that once showed,
A flow of dough,
That made social control,
More comfortable.
That was until,
Everything fell all to hell.
One by one like dominoes.
Poor little dolls.
Trying for survival.
Yet for yrs yawl been in denial.
So, forgive me if I,
Don’t care about tears from a crocodile.
That transformed beautiful lands,
To wastelands.
That set up rules that put vatos in jail.
Without fair trials.
As the poor become corpse piles.
A vile stench trails.
But will never be inhaled.
By those who prevail.
A statement that is like a nail.
Being put into a coffin.
Isn’t humanity something?
Instead of reflection,
Or reconciliation.
History becomes like young padawans,
Facing off against Anakin.
Where truth becomes fairytales,
From once upon.
A time where superior specimens.
Overcame the savage ones.

Wondering what hill I’ll die on,
Will I end up in hell or in Zion?
Sometimes I feel like a who,
Only heard by Horton.
And I ain’t talking about Tim.
For my people’s lands,
Have been invaded by zim.
Yet we are the ones treated as aliens.
And unlike like a roll up the rim.
There is no please play again.
****.
Never trust a clown,
Especially if they wear a crown,
Why stick with milk,
When you could have the cow.
Why share the land,
When you could steal the oil.
Set the hen house on fire,
And watch as things go afowl.
Wondering who’s next,
Better ask the owl.
As they can see the evil in the eel,
That try to distract people,
With their promises and ideals.
But actually bring woe.
They say you reap what you sow,
So, be careful what you grow.
For bitterness is like a poison pill.
That spoils our fill.
Teach a white man to fish,
And for generations blood will spill.
As a sour sorrow echoes through the ville.
But is quickly dismissed.
That makes one wish,
Our voices could be taken as serious as,
A siege on Capitol Hill.

Sometimes **** doesn’t go your way,
It’s like I prefer to make it harder on myself,
Cause I prefer to take the longest way.
Yet also gotta find time for self help, even if you’re;
Pressed for time every gosh **** day,
Never will hear me say the lords name in vain.
Even though I’m a sinner, I know there’s room for change.
And yes I’m a swearer; to my moms disdain.
But we all fall short, cause we’re all humane.
And until that final court day, I must maintain!
Cause I don’t do **** halfway!
Got to make the most of this life,
Even if it’s a bit risqué!

Go ahead and seize the day!
While also putting **** to bed.
Don’t want to be no slave.
Or give free space to those,
Trying to reside within your head!

Call it carpe diem,
Might just slide into your dm’s,
Might just sky dive next weekend!
Hell I might just start casting out demons!
Only God can take me,
Or get me kneeling.
I’m done being stuck in the mud!
It’s bout time for healing!
I’m done being suffocated,
It’s bout time I start breathing.
Give thanks and a prayer than dive back in the deep end.
To help others that be drowning.
Gotta make a stand for those,
condemned by the world.
Unwilling to lend a hand.
So, I gotta do my part to help them…

Go ahead and seize the day.
While also putting **** to bed.
Don’t want to be no slave.
Or give free space to those,
Trying to reside within your head!

M’s in my bank account,
Going out like an auto bot because I be rolling out.
Shorty says I’m spacing out.
Puffing fog like I’m the phantom of an opera house.
Than fighting dragons with my Viking shout.
Man things can turn so nuclear,
Call that a fallout.
But everyone has a call of duty,
To knock down structures like an angry birdie.
You can either approach life like the fresh prince,
Or like an Ol ******* by getting your hands *****.
Who cares how you earn money,
It’s what you do with that money.
Uh,
Making bank,
Fk a s*k,
Go hard in that paint,
Uh,
Make that dollar,
Take that day off like Ferris Bueller,
Be a man, don’t ya fking faint!
We ain’t saints.
We as tainted as some fking windows,
So, ***** fate,
Why lay low?
When you still might never get into heavens gate?
I can’t see why we can’t have everything and that slice of cake.
So, while ya do missionary,
Imma continue to procreate,
Got my priorities straight,
Going over 100% percent like All might,
Got some quirks but that just adds to my delight.
I guess you can say that I’m quite smashing,
My girl screams for my fist so badly,
******* on her **** like I’m Kirby,
She my boo, I’m her sully!
Uh,
Got them M’s,
Spending that money.
Got a new whip,
Spending some cash on my honey,
Uh,
Got them M’s,
Spending that money.
Got a new whip,
Spending some cash on my honey!
Yeah, yeah!
I wish everyday were more like this!
Enjoying my time, hope I got more to spend.
Just gotta roll them higher numbers on them dice I guess?
Finding more ways to leave my prints.
Started out like coal, but made myself into a diamond.
Overcame so many foils, because I ain’t no fool to success.
Achieving all my goals, not falling for no schemes from pyramids.
I wish everyday was like this!
Like this, like this!
Everyday, everyday yeah!
Catch a vibe, getting high,
Yeah, yeah!
This is the life, partying every night!
Spending that money, reaching those heights!
Yeah, yeah!
It’ll be alright,
Even if we die young tonight!
It’ll be alright! It’ll be alright!
It’ll be... oh it’ll be...
Just wait and see...
It’ll be... oh it’ll be...
Alright.

The snow falls in silent flakes, green baby leaves off pliable branches shudder under the unfamiliar weight. The light fluffy cold that grips so tightly, which slips out of sight, lost in crisp wilderness of this winter wonderland. Shimmering, glistening, dreaming of spring long past, now it's winter time, time to warm up in the bar and order a flask. Children sleep with dreams of summer, is no one going to tell them that summer doesn't exist in this wasteland? Dreams, hopes, desires drift from here to that other place where it is warm and life reaches to the warm sun. Will summer ever return; this is as true as the ice that formed on the lake. The seeds, carefully prepared, labeled, and bagged were the promise of next year's crops. Days are filled with keeping the wood stove flaming- cutting logs, splitting, carrying, this fire that they desire. Huddled in bed, keeping warm with fire and flask counting the time until the blizzard snow melts. The sun reappears, the fields uncovered for belated planting, hope springs through eternity, spring arrives at last.

I used to know a boy who was happy,
I’ve seen a heart broken, and innocence forsaken
I’ve tried to sail the sea’s,
But wasn’t ready to face the kraken.

I used to know a boy who was gentle.
I’ve seen anger take over, leaving everything in his path broken.
I’ve tried to be Qui-Gon,
But ended up like Anakin.

I used to know a boy who was thoughtful.
I’ve seen insecurity slowly destroy him, and jealousy consume him.
I’ve tried to blast off into space,
But wasn’t prepared to defend myself against aliens.

Oh, I used to know,
Oh, I used to know,
I used to know how to laugh.
I used to know how to cry.
Oh, I used to know,
Oh, I used to know.

Going 2 steps forward.
Just to go 2 steps back.
Going in circles,
Longing for a straight path.
A never ending cycle,
A never ending story.
I used to want to get older,
But now I wish I could stay younger.

When I used to know.
Oh, when I used to know.
How to laugh, and to cry.
The more I move forward,
The harder it is to say goodbye.
To who I was before all of this.
To who I was before I got stuck in this mess.
Oh, when I used to think.
When I used to think.
Life was the best.
But know I’m in checkmate,
Never knowing I was in a game of chess.

Life is like a circle,  You live , you go to school, you graduate, you make a lot of mistakes on the way, you buy a house for yourself or maybe just live in an apartment. You get your first, second or third job, you maybe go to college or university and graduate, than get a better job. Maybe while being in a relationship, you get married and have kids, and then the circle begins again but this time it's for your kid. While you grow older, made some good money, get to see your kid(s) go through life like you did, but hopefully had a better experience. Then next thing you know your in an old folks home. Your kids are married off, and every so often you get to meet your grand kids, and see them go through their circle of life. Knowing that's yours is about to end. But it's ok cause you've done it all, and you don't regret anything, and if you had the choice you wouldn't really want to change a thing if you got to start all over again.

Coming out of a comatose,
Running round bout to post,
That bail money, then travel past the coast.
Real survivor like a roach.
And just like a golfer it’s all about my approach.
I like to look at life positively unlike Oscar the grouch.
Got that new whip,
Spreading my message like some cool whip,
And I don’t **** with people who got the case of the loose lips,
For the moment they open up they mouth,
Imma fill it up with a couple of clips.
Bang.
Pop off a shorty in order to keep others in their lanes.
Got to think smart, like General krang.
If you don’t want to end up like Citizen Kane.
Dang.
Don’t want to end up like Citizen Kane.
Dreaming of rose buds, man this ain’t no candy land game.
Wannabe be upstarts snorting their own *******.
It’s such a shame, in fact it’s insane.
Breaking one’s back over the littlest of things.
Don’t you realize that a lot of yawl are no more than petty cliches.
Trying to keep things private, when we live in a public domain.
Truth is in this day and age, we don’t actually own anything.
Yet we feel entitled to everything.
Thinking we are owed something.
Yet we are owed nothing.
Putting on elaborate acts, but life isn’t supposed to be treated like charades.
Trying to act like your an entree, but you don’t realize that means nothing at a buffet.
You only live once, you won’t get no replay.
Thinking your free, when your really in chains.
Thinking your unique, but when you die will anyone actually remember your name?
Name.
Name.
Uh, but **** it!
When I got that new whip,
Spreading my message like some cool whip,
And I don’t **** with people who got the case of the loose lips,
For the moment they open up they mouth,
Imma fill it up with a couple of clips.
Bang.
Pop off a shorty in order to keep others in their lanes.
Got to think smart, like General krang.
If you don’t want to end up like Citizen Kane.
Dang.

Diving into bath salts, raving flue that is as sicking as math, at least that is what I conclude from my findings presented to the court. Objection, objection, sir I don't see the connection, maybe your rhyme scheme needs perfection. Maybe it does, but ***** it, I'm blessed by God; baby please sit down and take a chill pill and just enjoy this buzz. Busting off, so back off, bout to prove my case like I’m Ace Attorney, oh and I know it’s off topic but if I lived in America, I would’ve voted for Bernie. What the **** am I on? Came to save the digital world you can call me a digimon, you bet I’m a champion! Serendipity dear deputy; I’ll be typically wittingly searching for some tranquility. What is the validity of this vicinity as I only accept notability and won’t let this become a liability!

Pathologically paraplegic hypochondriac with insomniac who be popping poems profusely perfect; while whimsically worm's try to be strategic, but sadly choke and lose it. Miles set apart; it certainly is not a strut in some park, but everyone has to start somewhere before they engrave their mark. Don't reside yourself to just being a silhouette, nor be one to toot your clarinet. Two sides to every person like Dr.Jekyll and Mr.Hyde; be careful to not let your pride turn into carbon monoxide. For pride will always lead to your downfall, so please take off your iron curtain and tear down your Berlin wall. Improvident incongruous incredulous confidence; underwhelming astonishment of such fundaments of these heinous and callous acts of deceitfulness. Trickery of thy decadence; why art though jittery when you are full of benevolence? So used to getting what you want I bet; well this situation can not be fixed by dough, so I see why you are in a cold sweat! Fake confidence won't help you here especially when one lies; you made a mistake and will face the consequences and I am not one quick to forgive no matter how much you apologize.  

Don’t have time to consider your sensibility, because my life is going a twitter with too much hyperactivity for me to deal with your stupidity. Befittingly that I’ll be building up the intensity, to infinity and beyond goes this creativity of this anomaly. Not going to prolong this phenomenon, I’ll be going off like a Molotov over this intercom, yeah you better not ever underestimate this underdog. Lackadaisical are these other rappers; they’re so replaceable and incapable to be educational. Incomprehensible is this loop of hip-hop now a days, why can’t we be inspirational or is it to late because we left morals and substance back in the olden days. Can’t afford to be anchored anymore, I’ve poured in too much time to be just be locked behind some door. I refuse to be ignored and be left ashore; I am not worried about going into the storm; because you are bound to come across some things that need some work like chores. Spinning the wheel, reminiscing of how it felt when I no longer concealed who I was and my self-image had been healed.

Used to be reclusive & convinced myself that I was a duffass, but now I’m exclusive to being a smart ***. This is the new era, this is a new fire; it’s time to spice things up so better pull out the sriracha. Leading the revolution like I’m Che Guevara, I’m light as feather whatever the endeavor even if my life story doesn’t end up as pristine as Cinderella’s. Why so infatuated by worldly wants? Why so decorated when you can't hide the fact that you're the same basic *** font? Trying be something else, striving to be someone else, wanting to be anything else. You are who you are, if you think it will make things better you cucu, because in my eyes you are really a star. You have to expand your interpretation and perspective of life, you have to demand without hesitation a piece of that collective pie; because I believe everyone should be equal in this life.

Calculated bullets that go straight through my cranium; manufactured outlets that show great things but have also turned us into brainless aliens. Complicated hookups that grow irritating and become as unstable as uranium; what was once sacred has become as spontaneous as going to a gymnasium. Confiscated trinkets cast away and leaves those affected very irritate; while also simultaneously making apathetic souls that have gone through the same thing be able to understand, help or relate. Cultivated rebellious culprits that don't take the memo of being cooperative, instead they choose to be provocative and opposite of the other conglomerates. I’m so fascinated by this fabricated segregated supposedly liberated and sophisticated community; where-as some so foolishly stupidly amusingly think that everyone has the same equal chance at opportunity. Moderated, regulated and orchestrated where some are situated; if you don’t think that it has something to do with be affiliated to a certain demographic then maybe you never got educated in the affairs of those discriminated. It’s a good thing then that class is in session; so viewer or listener  please use discretion when taking time to witness or hear my position. Deafening out all ill whims; wrestling with these unsettling menacing fears and guilt from all of my sins.

Yeah no need for hallucinogens, all I need is two hydrogens and one oxygen. Rocking in my moccasins; so you can bet I am not one to drop my promises. Native honour who is also a innovative scholar and who was created not to falter. I may not be good with numbers, but I'm good at making sure you never slumber on my words; because I work on them day and night in my 36 chambers. Beware the pretender, they are manufactured by the vendors to keep us from being together. Defend your heart; be wise who you befriend and who you pick for your counterpart. There will be hurt and affection can be perverted, so know your worth and never ever let yourself be distorted. It is not your fault, it is not my fault, so then who is at fault? Is it just life in general? Is it because of the being who lives eternal? Is it all of the above? I don't know, but we shouldn't judge and instead choose to accept and love!

Pardon me Martin, but if this class were a prison I’d be the warden. I make the rules here and I took the tools given to me to get me here. So listen, please listen to my lesson that I have to present to you as class is still in session. Loading yawl with ammunition to be able to transition to be able to complete your goals or missions. No I’m not tripping, I’m driven  by a higher force to break away the old ways of thinking such as division. This is not the prohibition anymore, so please open your minds and join me on this expedition. Going into the unknown, so here’s to hoping you get through this, as time goes on and be able to look back at it we may feel like this was no more than a tiny but important milestone.  Achieve, believe, conceive, receive, intrigue, and succeed because I think you are unique. You are the only you in the whole galaxy, don’t let agony turn into tragedy; ***** anxiety; yeah and never let your dreams just be some fantasy.

Outro: Sit down class ain't over yet, forfeit those frowns or fake faint or try to jet. Lastly remember what transpired today; don't go hastily and forget about it on December break okay? For though class may be over, more days or years to come until its finally over. Though education ends, one never stops learning even on vacations with family or friends.  I hope you can look back with fondness, I hope you can stay on track in the future if you truly take the time to just focus. Is there truly an end or is this just the beginning to a new bend.

Ravishingly relevant, don't give a **** about being elegant. Thanks for the sentiment, but I will not give you any dividends. To me you are no more than excrement, can't you see that I am benevolent. Dashingly skilled, got a strong will, shoot to ****, run of the mill, if you join me I will never treat you Ill. Shockingly built, not going to bear any guilt, for if I do I will wilt. Establishing my mark on this earth, destined for greatness ever since my momma gave birth. Developed moral codes that one could not break, never tried to play it safe, you can bet that I will not give in and just be another phony fake. For heavens sake, no pun intended; don't give a **** if you’re offended, my friends are all colourly blended. So what if I'm not politically correct, you **** heads don't always have to be so *****. So elect me for president or prime minister or whatever, how could it get worse when politics is full of bad weather. Canadian born, but my name isn’t Aubrey, that guy who is worn out yet he thinks himself as godly. Funny, narcissistic sloppy rich boy sell out, Mr. ****** ****** get out, or you will be taken out. Classy J will you show you how it’s done, I do this **** for fun, never claimed to be number one. I am definitely not the goat, but I stay afloat, to devote my time to finding the truth instead of finding a scapegoat. Real deal, making people like you my next meal, you will be no more than a third wheel. Sure I can't free style, sure I rant about how it is to be a Cree, but when it comes to original verses I surpass you by a mile. I will never reconcile, I will keep on being a clever juvenile. They will file this rap beef as a no contest, no need to weigh in against a crap invested slugfest. But back to my rap, not about to waste my time rhyming about rappers that slack, it is like I am rapping against scrap. Anyways, these days, people have become dazed, it's like we living life sideways. Don't be succumbed, look towards that sequel, don't lower yourself and stay hazed for if you do you'll stay dammed. Not here to have you condemned, but if you hook up with the wrong crowd you will end up harmed. Stay esteemed, never **** your dreams, anything taken away can be reclaimed.

I started out the bottom, unlike that ****** drake.
I never seen a biracial rapper try so hard not even logic can take that cake.
Bro got merked by Pusha, then got merked by Kendrick; that ain’t even up to no debate.
Call that a double homicide, but there ain’t gonna be no roses for some jail bate!
Man, Chat gpt working more overtime than your efforts to increase the populations birth rate.
Got R Kelly jr over here; hold up, wait… where’s the police?
Perhaps them goofy goobers can’t handle the heat?
Of them, 81’s grovelling beneath a CP’s feet.
****, I’d never thought I’d see the day when gangs went against their own beliefs.
Money over everything, corrupting everybody from thugs to priests.
But at least it’s got everyone distracted, keeping their eyes off the Middle East.
Tell when I start telling lies? Only then will I take a seat!
Pa pa pa pow, rest in peace!
Pa pa pa pow, rest in peace!
**** this ****!
Bring the lyricism back; I ain’t here to make no twerking songs.
You best know Classy J grew up on that real ****, like those Shady, Biggie and Tupac songs!
I don’t have beef with ya unless you're Drake or the Diddler; we’ll probably get along.
This is usually the part I’d tell them to **** my ****.
But I know the thought of it would get them perverts salivating like some dog.
Ra, ra, ra ruff, ruff! Am I wrong?
Ra, ra, Ra, ruff, ruff! I ain't wrong!
Okay, okay, okay, for real, though.
I ain't claim to be no hero!
I ain't no villain either; I'm more like Malcolm, man; I'm something in the middle!
And these rhymes help me stay in remission,
So, that I always keep **** level.
For real, I gotta keep working to block out the lies of the devil!
Which was formed by trauma since I was very little.
Even before that, the pain was literally ingrained in my people's genomes!
A legacy of death that will take a couple of generations to heal.
Yet some still believe that it ain't no big deal or if it was even real.
The fact is, humanities ****, and we’ll eventually clog our own wheel.
Tell when I start telling lies? Only then will I take a seat!
This is my classy interlude *****; class is in session; take a seat!

welcome to classy productions, this is the beginning of my classy movement, so enjoy this ride with me, and please keep your bias opinions to yourself, thank you. Yeah started from the bottom unlike, I ain't no phoney fake, I have a for you all; spoiler alert it may be honest and hurt your ignorant minds. This is my interlude but we haven't been formally introduced, my name is classy j, it's my privilege to make some sick mind blowing rhymes just for you. Grew up in a broken home, only child all alone, yeah just me and my mom, if I could go back and change things I would, but life sadly life has no rewind. I only have the road in front of me, so I  chase it, trying to find out my destiny, trying to figure out the real me. Started life, grasping for life, I've been a fighter my entire life, because I don't take **** from others. Left with my ironic name, left with a messed up family, left to walk the darkness of life, trying so hard to see. Life happens man, humans are idiotic fiends, survival of the fittest in the war zone of life, no where to hide, no way to find cover. Bonafide native that has a talent for the creative, not an alcoholic, not some drug addict, but yet society and police doesn't seem to want to accept me yet. They tell me to go to nativia, quickly let's do some trivia, to see how really stupid you all are. Illegal genocidal aliens mad about other foreign aliens, natives were here first, so I don't want to hear you fret. If you don't like it leave, when become a discriminated minority, let me know about it the next time you go by my bar. You have no clue what true classiness is, because indigenous people still are alive  and are now ready to challenge your privileged view. We used to be quiet and contempt with taking all your lie's and *******, but now we are ready to fight for what we stand for, so beware the upcoming storm. You tried to **** us, you tried to make us white, but it didn't work out for you, government you may be ******, but we will no longer be your jews. This is reality, you've been warned, it doesn't need to become a race war, cause if it came to that, would you be prepared to combat against our final form. This is a real issue, that you can no longer hid in your dark past. It's time to stop your lie's, it's time for honesty, it's time for class, so sit your white assess down, because we are now in session. You lucky this is just an interlude, because I'm not close to being finished with you, you may not enjoy this, but I'm having a blast. Evidence all over the place, why go to court, when you should just tell your guilty confession. NO more half fast apologies and no changes being made after that? What is up with that? I ain't having that! No way to truly slice this issue cleanly, because I promise there will be some after math in this habitat you bunch of tardy cats.

O-o-ah-ah, brain has gone bananas, no-no don’t touch the lava- lava.  Jumping around, monkeying around, sometimes you have to let loose and mess around. If fun is a crime then put my neck round the noose, lighten up and if your cheap, don’t worry I got some grey goose. Come in and be my bunk buddy, if you hit the skunk, I don’t mind as long as you are not tardy to the party. ****, this is my jam; my friends to me are my true FAM.  Curiosity mixed with personality, every now and again I find myself getting naughty. It’s that time for the beat to make you rock with us, couple more drinks, and you’ll be ready to party with us. Classy J the future class, got the intellect to respect, other wise I will flatten you on your ***.  

Bull dozing through so yawl better move, don’t care if you cozy, got to show me you’re groove. Not joking around, do I look like a clown, take yawl to the pound and take this corrupt society down. Wow, this is new, who knew, that I could be as fresh as mountain dew, too wicked of a leader that there is no need for a cue. Good luck? Don’t need it, don’t even believe in it, I’m good with continually trudging on through this ****.  I got perseverance on my side, my appearance I will no longer hide. I got abilities, I adapt to my situation no matter the facility.  Don’t **** my mojo, hopping over all yaw with my pogo, let go of my leg yo, got a craving for some eggos.  So agile, yeah I built up defenses yet I still find myself scatter apart because everyone is a bit fragile. So kind, so generous, a role model to get behind, have to expand your bubble by being adventurous.

Hard hitting all yawl with real honesty, every time I write I throw out something out my closet and get more in tuned with my responsibility.  What is my priority, do I have a healthy anatomy, and am I truly acting out my ideology. Used to be easily frustrated, it didn’t take much to activate my buttons to make me aggravated. Now though I let my anger evaporate, now I have a mentally sound state.  I am at the stage of my life where I just say **** it, why should I really give a ****. Why should I let insecure fools get to me, why should I be anything more than who I choose to be.  My greatest strength and weakness is being loyal and faithful, it’s hard not to be hurt by betrayal, especially with people close to you; yeah that to me is even more disdainful. I see the good in people, I always believe that one day they may move on to their sequel. That’s why I always stress for yawl to be ambitious and confident, the rewards will be delicious as long as you are not fraudulent.

I remember when I became interested in this rap ****,
I was in elementary, specifically grade 6.
Knew about it before then but I didn’t like it.
Was a metal head that listened to the classics.
From tfk to guns and roses.
But then I heard real lyrics from a rapper who struggled just like you and me.
Who rapped about his life on the streets.
A man who was once homeless to becoming a two time Grammy nominee.
The one and only Fresh I.E.
It made me see what rap could be,
Where one can to tell people about their stories.
After that I did some researching.
Learning about flow, syllables and about timing.
Listening to the 116 clique while practicing my writing.
Everyday for the longest time, rap was the only thing I was breathing.
And around that time I was also struggling and angry about everything.
So, I transferred that into my lyrics which was so refreshing.
It was like my own personal therapy.
Where I could use profanity.
Which ironically shifted from my upbringing.
Which was centred in Christianity.
So, I needed a name that conveyed this new personality.
That was a mixture of good and evil known also as a duality.
Which originally was the name Don Richmon.
But I decided that wasn’t the name of a villain.
So, I took a route a little bit more classy.
And I knew I needed a gimmick to match this new personality.
So,I got myself a suit and a top hat.
And chose to rap about controversial topics that would get me some push back.
But as a minority I couldn’t just sit back.
And keep having these privileged ******* stay on the attack.
Using my freedom of speech as the ultimate payback.
And sometimes they get offended, but hey Im just spitting the facts.
Your just mad that now your the ones with the guns to your backs.
Because it’s about time to get rid of the plaque.
And you best know Classy J is up for the task.

Got my head in the clouds again,
Daydreaming of a life,
I could never live.
Love might as well be a fantasy.
I tried too hard to be like the covers I see on the magazines.
Grass seemed so much greener,
But in reality it was like gasoline.
That exploded in my face,
Guess I should’ve left the acting to those on the movie screens.

Stop, please. Get away from me. I don’t want no flash photography.
Should’ve never left my room.
Cause outside all I see is anxiety.
Shouldn’t have left my room.
Cause all I see is a critical society.

So, I float away.
I float away.
Head in the clouds.
Cause I can’t run away, run away.
So, I continue to float away,
Float away.

I’m feel like I’m always on low power mode,
Wonder when imma bout to shut down.
Medicine keeps me docile,
Haven’t been myself for awhile.
Broken hearted, shattered mind.
Daydreaming my life away.
Cause fantasy is more enticing.
Daydreaming my life away.
Cause I’m tired of fighting.

Stop, please. Get away from me. I don’t want no flash photography.
Should’ve never left my room.
Cause outside all I see is anxiety.
Shouldn’t have left my room.
Cause all I see is a critical society.

So, I float away.
I float away.
Head in the clouds.
Cause I can’t run away, run away.
So, I continue to float away,
Float away.

A nervous gitty feeling in my chest,
A feeling of butterflies.
When I see her my world stops.
Trying to find the courage to ask her out.
But not sure how as my dad was never around.
To teach me “how to be a man”.
Even when he is anything but...

However, I can’t help but too daydream,
Of a version who isn’t afraid to be vulnerable.
A person unafraid of rejection.
Because it feels like rejection is all that I know.

The only person who had my back is my mother,
Through my darkest of times,
And my highest of highs.
Teaching me to be myself and treat women with respect.

So, who knows maybe that is the only advise I need.
To gather strength to ask coffee girl out.
Yes, I don’t even know her name.
Nor she know mine.

But I gotta step up,
And take that step,
Even if I can’t see the bridge.
I’m willing to take that leap of faith.

Cold alone afraid, no light to brighten our way, just set in our ways, cold have we become in this age. Cold, we are cold to people. Cold, we are cold to ourselves. Cold, to the world. Scrooges' we've become. Heart full of distain. Vain and ill intentions cloud our judgement. Cold attitude, so high we are, can't see beyond our own noses. Cold love, hate forms up. Tensions rise up, offensive attendees who don't see how they are offensive. Cold war, waiting to push the button for M.A.D. Nuke city, don't look pretty. Petty of how we've fallen out of what was once semi-peace. Guns dominate, youths are indoctrinated. Propaganda violating human rights. But it's ok we are the good guys. Yeah Right, we all evil, we have all gotten to entitled to see we are all actually the same. Cold days, cold nights, all we want to do is fight, that's just not alright anymore.

As I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
Seeing chalked outlines of brothers, I haven’t met,
Cause the cops been harassing and profiling so long,
People become desensitized, pretending nothings wrong.

Seeing so many innocent children that didn’t deserve it,
Have a hoodie in the store, you assume it’s a burglar,
You better watch your chatter, otherwise the gun gonna clatter.
Becoming just another body bag for another mother.
And the news may report it,
But the next day it won’t matter.

I really hate to alarm, but I’m fed up,
Some think it’s silly, saying **** it up.
The same fools that never experienced harm.
Assuming based on colour, that I must be armed.
So, they pull up on me like I’m a terrorist,
Which is pretty ******* racist,
No matter what way you measure it!
Having a knee on a neck,
Like they need a prayer addressed.
Yet they call my people violent.
Very ironic? Isn’t it?

Been spending most our lives,
Living in a colonist paradise,
Could hang as much ***** as you like,
Living in a colonist paradise.
We keep spending most our lives living in a colonist paradise,
Have many have to be sacrificed till we question this colonial paradise?

Look at the situation they got us facing,
We can’t live a normal life, we was taken from our land.
So, now we got to conform to new rules G,
Becoming puppets for the bourgeoisie.

I’m an educated savage with justice on my mind,
Got my Diploma in my hand and pride in my eyes,
I’m a rez’d out desperado, Cree that’s muy guapo.
And my patience is worn, so don’t provoke my fuego!

Fool, death ain’t nothing but are martyrdom away,
Just one spark away,
From lighting the fuse,
That will blow away.
The old narrow minded and rotten society.

Every child matters,
It’s pretty sad, that I even have to say that homie.

Been spending most our lives living in a colonist paradise,
Could slaughter as much children as you like,
As long as you say you’re doing it for your Christ.
We keep spending most our lives living in a colonist paradise,
Have many have to be sacrificed till we question this colonial paradise?

Power and the money, money and the power.
Promise after promise, liar after liar.
Everybody breathing, but half of them ain’t living.
It’s going on in our community, but nobody looking.

They say I gotta get over it, but nobody here see’s the trauma from it!
If they can’t understand it, how can reconciliation come out of it?
I guess they can't, I guess they won't
I guess they frontin', that's why I know my life is out of luck, fool!

Been spending most our lives living in a colonist paradise,
Could imprison as many asians as you like.
Living in a colonist paradise.
We keep spending most our lives living in a colonist paradise,
Have many have to be sacrificed till we question this colonial paradise?

In morning dew, the world delights in colour.
With greenish meadows,
And white clouds that blankets blue skies.
Where flowers blossom with reds, yellows and purples.
With red robins fluttering and chirping.
Till dusk turns to dawn.
And owls awaken.
When camouflaged snakes slither and hiss.
And wolfs howl at the moon.
When mice scatter trying not make a clatter.
The night tells a different story.
One of survival.
At least for animals.
For human however it is a different endeavour.
While some slumber others gamble.
Spending coin to enjoy a chance at happiness.
For mornings aren’t always seen as a happy time,
Where responsibilities take over,
And no time to party.
Or have time to relax.
Either way it’s poison.
So, might as well take the chance.
That some see as lust.
While others see it as a life free from stress.
After all isn’t money the measurement of success?

Overdosed on my sin, got myself all twisted up in idiosyncrasies, what happened to that boy who sang in the choir’s musical symphony?  Don’t understand it, I try to move forward but I can’t move, stuck in my ill prison, used to get vision, but now I am apart of a knew subdivision. Falling angel, why was it wrong to question this universe, now religion treats me like I’m Lucifer. Testing my niceness, can’t they see that I just want to be left alone; offended offenders just can’t let it go that I just want to go at life on my own. I always used to ****** analyze my friends to improve their self health, even though I was a ****** that just couldn’t analyze himself. Comatose patient there is no escaping this life that may just have an eternity to go, sorry but I don’t know if ok with that amigo.  Inconclusive theory’s saying that they are factual, searching for facts in a world full of extortion in a system run by cannabis animals. Ticking away the time doth go on with or without me, to be or not to be in this desert wasteland we call reality. Really why should I bother being politically correct, ***** those formality’s, with my fiery vengeance just like scorpion; fatality. Complicated overrated everyday living got me feeling dizzy that I’m starting to fade out, just checked out of my self conscious because I’m just so burned out. To early to late, heart vs. the mind, darkness vs. light, comatose feel like a ghost that has just lost hope with its current host.

Running along side the river flowing every so elegantly. Crisp crunchy leaves falling down from the trees. Grass so green and smelling like the sweet honey of bee's. Sky so blue, sun so bright going down ever so gently. So peaceful, with the sounds of birds chirping. I arrive at my home, ***** and tired from having so much fun. I get cleaned up and then I go downstairs for some soup, all the while getting reminded not to slurp. This is the country life and I wouldn't have it any other way.

Checks and mental imbalances,
**** bounces as quickly as recovery and relapses.
******* madness, if only hope could increase like taxes.
Take licks, with ego and body piling up with bruises.
Not sure if I’m living or grinding?
Grinding on *******,
Till 9 months later,
Child support be knocking.
****!
Why must my actions have equal and opposite reactions?
Getting distracted by these fatal attractions.
Trying to appeal to my emptiness,
Because I long for satisfaction.
But no matter what I do ***** always lacking.
Don’t mind me,
My high is just failing and I’m crashing.

Crash and burn.
When will **** take a right turn?
Will I ever learn?
Or will things continue to…
Crash and burn.

Think imma about to go insane,
Watching as everyone jumps onto the drug train.
They may be over the moon,
But soon they’ll be over the cliff,
That’s what happens when ya over consume,
Not knowing yawl was doomed the moment ya decided to take a sniff.
Pay the piper, pay for bricks.
What’s the foundation?
What you painting with?
Crash and burn,
In hopes to make it rich,
Crash and burn,
Can’t escape the itch.
Crash and burn,
Till ya sleep with fish.
Life’s a game, a game of risk.
Can you afford to take the hit?

Crash and burn.
When will this **** take a right turn?
Will I ever learn?
Or will things continue to…
Crash and burn.

Sentenced to the hygienist, because I got that Indian virus.
Wish I was more like Leonidas, for my warrior self was vanquished.
Got a sense of anguish, as I don’t even know my own people’s Language.
Why did I get banished from my own land, and these immigrants now hold thee advantage?
Feels like they on a witch hunt, ain’t life a ***** huh?  
Can’t even make a quick buck, because I’m seen as a stupid ****.
Feel like a sitting duck with the ****** locked, **** is this the feeling of a cuck?
Stories always end up sad but Afterall I’m just the ******* of the brady bunch!
Brown skin cursed kin and a desperate sin so I gotta eat outta garbage’s for lunch.
Trying not to use victimization as a crutch,
but it’s like I’m a kid who got tricked into a game of double Dutch.
Crazy braided brain, deranged rabid rabbit spewing train going down a road of pain.
Come on yawl don’t you want to see the freak from cirque de soleil?
Trying in vain to wash away my shame, but the colour of my skin just won’t go away, oh what a shame!
So, I’m left crying and thinking about dying, hoping to be anything…
that may stray away from my family name.
For I’ve realized that I’m stigmatized by the whitened eyes:
that be educating lies of me being the one to blame.

No more will I be ok with this forced recital!
No more will I sit idle!
No more patriarchy, and **** the curse of ham nonsense used to justify you being spiteful!
**** your racist sentiments man, my colour doesn’t make me homicidal.

Brown clown, Down syndrome gnome!
Torn men, torn women left in prison zones!
Burn them, **** them, **** them right in they home!
Don’t frown, don’t make a sound, just stay on the ground.
Hands behind heads, then shot with lead, like a dog from the pound!
Lost and never found, but this just the curse of being brown!
What’s this now?
Nothing but wards of the crown.
Just a *****, just a glitch, that live in some crack towns!
Or reserves doesn’t matter what the word
Or what the place is when one puts on war paint on top of their savage faces.
Here’s the thing *****, I’m not scared of staring ya down #okacrisis!
For as see it colonists are no different than isis.
I know we deal with vices,
But it’s just the effects of dealing with your hepatitis!
And I just might be bias,
But at least I’m not a delusional racist!
It doesn’t matter if it’s Past, present or future violence,
I think it’s about time to end the silence!

Crooked ballerina
Push my buttons, twist my knobs, tear me apart. Not much left in my heart, for my emotions are lost in the abyss.  Little dolly don’t worry it’ll get better. Crooked ballerina don’t worry it’ll feel better. When shall I feel, or is hope just a thimble and needle? Tossing and turning like they want me too. Twirling swirling down the rabbit hole falling into the unknown. Smile or you won’t get diner baby. Slim fit is what is deemed perfection baby. Do it for me for I put my neck out for you. I made you, I can disassemble you to fit my mosaic. Piece by piece turning into an object that is as fake and flimsy as plastic. Come on doll dance for me, come on Barbie sing for me. Bruised and ****** what happened to me? Mirror mirror what have you done to me? Over and over the cycle goes when it stops only the consumerist knows. I remember when I wanted people to play with me,but know I hate when people play around with me. Just a substance to ease the nerves, just a toy to discard to someone else before getting tossed in the trash. Oh innocent young one how long has been? Oh time why are you no longer my friend? Oh little baby why couldn’t your family take care of you better. Cracked and chipped, a burden to some and a opportunity for fiends. Pulled by strings, fake smiles and personality but that’s what sells. Push my buttons, twist my knobs, tear me apart and toss me out cause that’s what you’re good at. Equal gain while others suffer in pain. For that’s how the world works. For we are all just dolls and crooked ballerinas that get cycled through this machine. Fading away slowly, what is it to be human? I don’t know anymore. I don’t know how long I can keep up this fake smile. I don’t know how long I can keep up with each new fad.  Turning round and round all to hold onto the crown. Turning round and round got a pocket full of posies  now we all fall down.

Women viewed as objects.
Men can't cry unless they're weak.
Women get paid less than men.
Men are on the front lines of war.
Women commercials convey 1950 views; that suggests women should stay in the house.
Men are looked as the villain when it comes to getting custody and in the eyes of the law.
Two-sides of the coin but we blinded cause we only see from our points of view.
We are all the victims so the problem must be with you?
But really we are our own problems for we caused this to be ingrained into society.
All because of cultural norms that were established thousands of years ago that only helps a minority of notoriety.

When the lights fade, when the curtains withdraws and hides me, will you leave or try to find me? When all is said and done, will you stay strong, even if everything goes wrong? Just actors on strings, drifting on stage portraying something we are not. After the show, will we be together, or will we act out differently when we walk onto the worlds stage? I never asked for much, nor did I expect anything, but it felt so real when I gave you that wedding ring.After all the singing, after all that we went through, I thought that our love would remain true. After all the thanks and the bowing with our phoney little smiles, I wished that it would never end. It felt so real, it's was like we were living a real life fairytale. The beauty and the beast; polar opposites brought together by mere fate. I implore you to hear me out, instead of constantly shutting me out. You can call me a freak, you can call me a geek, or even call me a liar, but no matter for I'll gladly hang by a wire if I am deemed a liar. They're calling for the curtain to collapse and take us out of peoples view, for how can I be myself if I am not with you? Blurred lines, but no matter. I'll cross it anyways, because seeing you just brightens my day. This interlude is now beginning to conclude, and I sit here boggled on what I could do. Stage exit, black out, for when that curtain falls, in my heart of hearts I know that were done.

The voices don’t turn off,
When I go to sleep,
Got me hearing them,
Every day of the week.

The voices don’t turn off,
When I go to sleep,
Got me hearing them,
Every day of the week

I personify my trauma,
Cuts on the wrist,
For a wish,
Just a wish,
That I didn’t look like this.
Cuts on the wrist,
For a wish,
Just a wish,
That I no longer felt like this!
Some say I need to stop the drama.
Treating my pain,
Like mathematics,
******* divisible.
Becoming invisible,
With my struggles treated as inhospitable.
Why do I gotta be treated as a criminal?
I’m just trying to speak out,
But yet you think I’m in it for attention.
Shoving pills down my throat,
Thinking that’ll cure the infection!
It’s no wonder that...

The voices don’t turn off,
When I go to sleep,
Got me hearing them,
Every day of the week.

The voices don’t turn off,
When I go to sleep,
Got me hearing them,
Every day of the week

Stuck in a toxic belief pattern,
With cuts on the wrist,
Cuts on the wrist,
Just for a wish,
Just for a wish,
That I didn’t look like this.
Got cuts on the wrist,
Just for a wish,
Just for a wish,
That I no longer felt like this!
Yet people say I chose this!
You think I’d choose this?
You think I’d choose to be beaten?
To be picked on?
You think I’d choose to have,
My father abandon me and my mother?
You think I choose to be abused?
To have teachers saying I’m worthless.
You think I’d choose this!
If you do you’re ******* stupid!
It’s no wonder that...

The voices don’t turn off,
When I go to sleep,
Got me hearing them,
Every day of the week.

The voices don’t turn off,
When I go to sleep,
Got me hearing them,
Every day of the week

I’ve been dreaming for some time.
Of fairies.
Soaring up high.
Brighting up the darkened sky.
And I can’t lie.
This feeling that stirs inside.
That some try to hide.
But I can’t let this moment die.
So, baby would you mind if I,
Take your hand in mine?

And come and dance with me?
Tonight.
Baby, won’t you dance with me?
Tonight.

I’ve been dreaming for some time.
Of butterflies.
And a smile as bright as the sunshine.
With eyes as blue as the sky.
Got me hypnotized.
Is this paradise?
I could fall asleep,
Right beside.
The one that I…
Love.

So,
Baby, come dance and with me.
Tonight.
Baby, won’t you dance with me?
Tonight.

Oh,
I don’t know, I don’t know, I don’t know, I don’t know.

Take it slow, take it slow, take it slow, take it slow, alright?

I’ve been dreaming for some time.
Of canaries.
And those red lips as sweet as cherry pie.
Oh, my! Oh, my!
I can’t help but feel paralyzed.
Oh, why! Oh, why!
Does my heart feel so sky high?
So high, so high!
So, baby would you mind if I,
Take your hand in mine?

And come and dance with me?
Tonight.
Baby, won’t you dance with me?
Tonight.

Warning!
You’re about to enter the Danger zone!
Danger zone!
Danger zone!
Danger zone!
Danger zone!
Uh, listen I’m about to enter the danger zone.
It’s like wearing a blindfold in a room drenched in chloroform.
This is the danger zone.
Climbing ladders just to be taken down by snakes.
Only overcoming these haphazards because of my faith.
And though I shake,
Though I quiver,
Though I have fits,
And have some treacherous fevers.
I know my God delivers.
From evil and sickness,
Through the thickest of storms,
I know I will overcome,
Because he knew me before I was even born.
And even after,
When I almost died in that ICU,
It’s true.
And Sometimes I struggle but I can hear,
God saying ICU.
It’s true.
There is no danger zone.
When I trust in you.
It’s true.
It’s true, it’s true.
There is no danger zone.
When my faith is steadfast in you.
It’s true.
It’s true, it’s true.
So, now I have to tell people the good news.
That it’s ok to struggle.
Because God’s with you.
And to not worry because He see’s you.
For even when we walk through the valley of the shadow of death , we shall fear no evil or danger,
for God is with us,
He is our rod and our staff, to comfort us.

Dark spectres enter my minds ear.
Trying to induce fear.
Lustful temptations mixed up within desires.
Dark inclinations intrigues my fascinations,
Warped expectations bleed over other sensations.
Heart palpitations steadily increasing anticipating satisfaction.
A Marked destination that looks like desirable vacation.
However, all that’s lies ahead is suffocation and destruction.
Grass always looks greener on the other side.
But why do those that have it, sometimes commit suicide?
Maybe our emptiness inside can never truly be satisfied?
There are no easy ways or any room for compromise.
Just dark inclinations racing in the mind,
As many try to find.
A light to guide.
Them through the toxic vines.
That try to confine.
For if ya don’t move forward,
You’ll start dying.
Because if you stop trying.
You’ll be lying.
In a bed of roses,
Roses filled with a dosage of regret, shame, guilt and unattended offences.

Shadows, ghetto's, ******'s thinking they jared leto, they not on that kind of level, we all messed up and deserve to burn for a eternity with the devil. Dark Roads, life is full of *** holes, trying to piece my life together but my brains been messed up, got to many plot holes. Tip toes, and grim shoes, making it rain, wasting my time on a bunch of hoes. Get off, and get out, drank the night away, yeah those days I really let myself go. Working for that pay roll to pay bills off, 3, 2, 1, we have lift off. As I drift off into my own land, wanting to escape from reality and fly off to Neverland. Long days and long night, travelling dark roads, yeah those days I really lost my sight.  Needed to get on better paths, no more dark days with immoral pleasures for I see myself slowly turning into a sociopath. Time to shape up, time to change, can only try be better and lock those inner demons into a cage.

Got taken advantage of, it’s like I socked right in the jaw!
How could you have forgot? How could you have forsaken?
Man, it’s taken me till now to see all the flaws!
Which has set me off, Man maybe I ought to be mistaken?
Or maybe I did not consider my expectations of this seesaw?
The pendulum has shifted but why are your always the one benefitting?
The outcome has become wilted, the friendship tainted, maybe we weren’t blood brothers after all!
I don’t know I’m just venting, and I’m just trying to take a deep breath in…
Because I thought we were brethren but it looks like I actually opened a door for a heathen!
Happiness is dead and gone; I have become the third wheel man, for I just don’t belong.
Trying my best to stay strong, because the person I once knew is dead and gone!
Wondering what went wrong? Wondering if all this time I was nothing but a pawn?
Calling you up, ringing the door bell to ask what’s sup?
Even though you never called me up or went to my door to say what’s sup?
What’s up with that? Maybe I really was nothing more than a bath mat!
I thought our friendship could last. But a las there was too much contrast.

Calabunga as go off shooting bad guys or good guys as long as I get my money. Eating chimichanga's in my Honda that I "borrowed" for awhile. Anti-hero that breaks the fourth wall, because that's my style. Shoot shoot, bang bang, kapow is this kungpow chicken. Oh you thought I was talking about fighting, haha, that's funny. Where are the hunny's, with all this money, you think they'd be on me. Slip zip I can be freaky with whips, go on trips, have insanity fits. Business is business, marvel universe, I killed them all; just saying. If you didn't know the name, it is deadpool, original rip off, yeah I don't care about haters because they are going to hate. Death stroke can't even get a date, with that ugly eyepatch, he couldn't beat me on his best day.

Pain internalized,
Trauma within the eyes,
With regret lying behind,
A disguised smile unrecognized.
Even by the specialized.
Wonder if you can sympathize?
With a society trying to stabilize,
What they see as animalized.
Creating a society that is demoralized.
That steals children with intentions,
To indoctrinize.  
Experimenting regardless of the savage cries.
Because soon they will be whitenized.
And will be normalized.
Numb to the pain and cast aside.
Having their culture sold and commercialized.
And if they protest they are taken out,
Like they were pests and the RCMP was the pesticide.

Why can’t they hear the cries?
Why won’t they listen to the cries?
How many more have to die?
How many more have to die?
Before we are finally recognized!
As humans nation wide!
Maybe they are just too deaf, dumb, and blind.

Identity compromised,
Fear got us paralyzed,
With our livelihoods stigmatized,
Fought in world wars,
But had our status demised.
Thought we were allies?
Jailed yet enfranchised.
There is no land of the free.
When even our blood quantum,
Is categorized.
I guess it’s not just the revolution,
That is un-televised.
Yet we always hear,
How many times do we have to apologize?
Just get over it.
Get a job and live healthy lives.
Unable to sympathize,
With those tyrannized.
And traumatized.
Unable to hear the cries.
Of those who have and still are,
Losing their lives.
Which got me asking?

Why can’t you hear the cries?
Why won’t you listen to the cries?
How many more have to die?
How many more have to die?
Before we are finally recognized!
As humans nation wide!
Maybe you’re just too deaf, dumb and blind!

Dear Dad, we’ve had our up’s and down’s
From being out of my life for fourteen years
To being in counselling sessions that made you realize your mistake
I was so hurt because of you, but I still forgave you

Dear Dad, I am glad we have a good relationship now
Every second week we hang out and play videogames or watch movies
We don’t communicate about a lot of stuff, as long as we still hang out that’s fine with me
We’ve come a long way, and i’m thankful I didn’t end my life back when I was hurt

Dear Dad, I don’t want you to feel guilty for not being in my life
And you're not the only reason, I wanted to end my life
See what’s done in the past, doesn’t matter today
Cause dad, I love you, and that’s all that matter’s to me today

Dear God, why do u love me, why did u create me, why haven't u smited me yet. Dear god, I don't deserve to live, I keep messing up,  and I always say im going to change but I don't. I just go back to doing the same bad things, and I don't know why? I guess I'm just addicted, afflicted by temptation, and it got me feeling sickly. God I need u to heal me of these deeds, I admit that am caught up in this selfish ambition. I think I may need rehab God because I'm just stuck in this eternal circle and can't get out of it. The guilt and shame is getting to me, I don't want to go to hell, yet I keep up with this dark secret of mine. People think im so holy, that I can't do anything wrong, but they only see the mask I put on, to hide what's on the inside. I fake myself, I'm such a hypocrite, I judge but don't want judgment. God this is my confession, and I know that this life u gave me is such a blessing, that I should not be wasting. I was lost in this darkness of mine walking blind, till u found me, and gave me a sign. God I need that sign again, because I'm back to my darkness. Dear God please forgive me for my sins, even though I don't deserve it.

Momma used to say a stupid is as a stupid does, and well Jennie I may be dumb but I know what love is. Life is like a box of chocolates, never know what you're gonna get, but I know what I want and I want you Jennie. You once asked me if I ever dream about who I'm gonna be, and well I don't know Jennie, I don't know who I want to be because I'm just me. I would run to the edge of the earth to be with you, I can't leave my past behind me when you're in it, I want to move forward but with you by my side. Like I've said before Jennie your my girl. You always will be, even if you never return a message back to me. I think I'm getting sick, so is the boy, maybe we got your illness before you left. I'm getting weaker by the minute, I feel as if I am about to die. So if this is the last goodbye, then so be it, I will be waiting for you in heaven. Goodbye Jennie.

im just so addicted, I keep trying to get out, but I always fall to temptation and that quick high. I always talk myself into that dark situation, it's so deceiving, it looks so good but it just makes life hurt more. It leaves me stuck in a muck, I need some help, before I get lost in my deadly desires. I need a savior, who will help me get out, before I end it all. Why do I do this to myself, why do I long for something that harm's me. Why do I always feel depressed, this guilt keeps weighting on me, I need to get out of this mess.

I’ve had doubts.
Hoping they weren’t true.
I’ve had doubts.
With you.
It started out awhile ago.
But I didn’t have proof.
At that time.
My mind was to focused on other things.
I should’ve seen.
The clues that came my way.
But love blinded me
And My trust misguided me.
Misguided by your illusions.
Convinced me it’s all a delusion.
And there is no need for suspicion.
Why do I always have to learn these hard lessons?
But I believed you.
Because I wanted to make it work.
Because pulling the band-aid would’ve hurt.
But if I could go back I would’ve ripped if of then.
The moment I found out my son wasn’t actually my kid.
****.
No doubt.
I should’ve listened to my doubts.
Do you understand the pain I felt?
My heart has become a jigsaw.
Don’t you have any guilt?
And my mind has become a see-saw.
Can I ever be rebuilt?
For right now I’m not just at a loss of words.
I’m lost at sea.
But even the sea won’t carry me.
So I’m drowning.
Going deeper to the depths.
As deep and dark as my depression.
This is my new home.
This is where you left me.
So all I have to ask now is...
Are you happy?

One of the greatest evils is big pharmacy,
Tons of minorities locked in jails for selling ****,
Sometimes getting life while rapists only get 2-4yrs...
****, that’s even too young for R Kelly.
Perhaps it’s just a pisstake?
Oh, **** I meant mistake.
Are we selling drugs to lawmakers?
Because I swear their brains are half-baked!
In a court of law,
Where one stands before God.
Yet man makes the judgement.
In a court of law,
Where one stands before God,
The same God your ancestors claimed they came with.
That left some in enslavement.
That left some in encampments.
That left behind a genocide,
That was justified as refinement.
A refinement that,
Took the land of others and made a profit.
A unearned profit that came from the blood and sweat,
Of those oppressed.
Yet many have the audacity to say get over it.
I wonder who truly has it easy?
I wonder who really gets the hand outs?
It’s definitely not the homeless.
Or the impoverished.

In God we trust,
Yet one’s nation is consumed by lust,
Treating money and *** as greater,
Than the God you claim you trust in?
In God we trust,
Whose God is that?
Mine or yours?

Perhaps the greatest evil truly is people?
For our human nature,
Keeps us from ever being truly equal.
With the change process becoming slower than a snail,
Have we truly hit the final nail?
In that coffin?
Still trying to spray perfume on what is rotten.
Is this all for not?
Stuck, and so caught up,
In a web of our own making?
Leaving a toxic cycle to keep on spinning,
All because of our pride,
Unable to control so we divide,
And than we conquer,
Watching as we **** each other,
Over wealth, land, religious beliefs and colour.

I'm coming undone, so stuck, so lost, dealing with my inner demons. I've become blind to my corrupt ways, lost in mediocre land, and I only care about myself. I'm suffocating in my own selfish ways, I need deliverance from this hell of mine. The one I leave inside, that monster lurking in my soul that I can't control. I'm try to convince myself that im fine but the truth is that im not. I don't want to die, yet sometimes I want to, im so conflicted inside. I just need deliverance from evil, but I don't deserve it, and sometimes I wonder if I truly need it. I let things consume my mind, losing sight of who I am.

I’ve been through so much,
Yet I still get depressed,
Like what more do I have to get off my chest?
I build myself up, just to be torn to pieces,
I don’t want to give up, by sometimes it just feels like I’m another blurred face.
Put within a space where I can’t even tell who the **** I am.
Or why am I even there.
I keep trying to be better, but still no one cares.
I’m still struggling with addiction,
And battling all my fears.
It’s just I can’t help but to go back to how I’ve always been.
Where my only friend is a bottle of gin.
But that is not my only crutch,
I’m also lost in my lust.
Lust for things, lust for fame and fortune.
To be treated as important instead of a mistake.
I just long for a day this emptiness will go away.
But for right now I’m stuck in a vortex.
With no air to breath.
Sometimes, I feel like Sisyphus pushing a boulder up a hill just for it to roll down again.
Like ****.
Why can’t I escape my insecurities,
That say I’m ugly, or won’t achieve anything.
Or ever be in love again.
I just feel broken and sad.
Even though I put on a good smile.
Or make people laugh.
It’s just that I finally understand what Robin Williams meant.
When he said that some of the greatest comedians are usually the most in pain.
For I’m good at giving advice or helping other people,
But when it comes to myself it’s the opposite.
I just give and give and give,
Until there is nothing left.
I want a break through,
I want to change,
I want to laugh and really mean it,
I want to love without all my past baggage.
But yet here I am,
Still Chasing my own tail.
Stuck in my own personal hell.
People say it’ll get better,
Tell me when the hell is that.
I’ve been in this cycle for eight yrs and still nothing’s changed.
Nothing has gotten better.
And I’ve been praying,
But maybe God is just too fed up with me.
Maybe I’m too far gone to ever see the light again.
I don’t know anymore,
Because right now I’m struggling.

Feel like I’ve become desensitized,
Blood on my hands,
But got sand in the eyes.
Don’t need a cancel culture,
Because my moral conscience,
Won’t let me hide.
And the trauma got me making excuses,
But how else does one overcome genocide?
And I can’t lie,
I feel empty inside,
Thinking of over 1000 ways to die.
Imprisoned within my mind.
It’s like I’m zombie-fied.
With everyday being a melancholy overdrive.
And my capacity is on low power mode,
In order to just survive.
But although I’m surviving,
I’m not truly living.
So, desensitized,
And Running out of feelings.
Have no moments to rest,
Because I can’t stop overthinking.
With persistent thoughts to numb it all,
By taking drugs, gambling, and drinking.
Really every addiction at this point looks appealing,
Yet I know what I got to do to start healing,
But its hard to explain,
Because I feel like a card dealer but I ain’t dealing.
With these issues because I’d rather start running,
Thinking I can out-run all these problems,
That keep on piling.
And when people say how awesome I am,
It’s unnerving,
Because complements,
Are something to, which I am undeserving.
At least that’s what I tell myself every morning.
Before I take my happy pill,
To give off the effect that everything in my life,
Is so ******* charming.
Even though in reality I am drowning.
I’ve become desensitized,
With everything around me distorting.
Desensitized to the violence,
Just another dead brother and sister,
Yet everyone’s ******* silent,
Doesn’t matter whether your defiant or compliant,
Not sure what’s worse the assailant?
Or the sirens?
When both be killing us!
If only people could take this **** serious!
Instead of calling us delirious.
Guess I’m not the only one that desensitized!
If you don’t believe racism exists,
That just means that you’re climatized!
Unable to recognize, that you’re indoctrinized.
Where hate, becomes normalized.
How can we expect change?
When we’re desensitized!

Despaired, impaired, scared of my past ways, can't seem to get away from crime, sorry to say mamma, even though I know you pray for me each and every single day. Gun shots, drugs, ***** money flowing through the streets, crime is the only way a family like mine can stay on their feet. If only life could be like Neverland but it seems like the creator had different plans for us; man. Brother apart of the gang called the crip, sitter prostitutes on 5th avenue, cops payed off by the higher ups, don't have no safety kit. Getting so jaded by the land that I have been based in, feel caved in, no place to be saved in, because this is the land of demons. City of sin, where no wins, we submit to the higher powers whim.  Puppets we all must fall in line, no hope in the city of crime, are we out of time? No time at all for us dusty broken porcelain dolls, as long as we high on the methanol, steal that million dollar car make sure it filled with petrol. Sell it on the black market because some one will buy it, and if we get caught we deny it.

When I say I'm a dope I mean that when I take dopamine to the brain.
I function differently but that doesn't mean I'm stupid,
like those who sip the lean.
Imma put a stir up on them when i take my serotonin.
Go in like a ronin, cause of the increase of these endorphins.
When I feel the sky in my hands I forget about my depression.
But tik tok boom I'm back in my suicidal feelings.
I feel like dynamite, so to diffuse please pass me the anandamide.
So many chemical mixtures I could become a superhero,
but to fix my uncontrollable urges I need the dinero.
So, maybe I'm really the super villain...
just a victim that gets defeated easier than krillan.
Heads up in the ceiling, feeling highs and lows, but I suppose...
I better put on a good suit of Armour like Gurren Lagann.
For I'm just a mortal in this kombat...
yet sometimes I try to act godly as if I'm Raiden.
Maybe it's just the after effects of a culture shock from society,
but who do they think they are Chris Sabin?
Don't know what route to be in,
for i'm rudimentarily flawed as a human.
Every day's like a Cuban missile crisis,
for this Cold War situation is like addicts on withdrawal...
because everyone becomes so **** suspicious.
I just want three **** wishes!
Most of them would be to get out of these messes.
Though it all boils down to what I decide is more precious!

Hook:
***** water all through these streets,
***** water poisoning what we eat,
***** water flooding the mind,
Poisoning how we think.
***** water all through these streets,
***** water poisoning what we eat,
***** water flooding the mind,
Gotta be careful what ya drink.

Verse 1:
Uh, Seems like we always in a state of emergency,
In a land of democracy,
Things don’t seem free to me.
It’s like trying to wash our hands in ***** water, g.
Everything has a cost, so tell who going to pay the fee?
It certainly not going to be the dominant society.
For the system was build by and for white people to have superiority.
That demonizes anyone that doesn’t conform to their authority.
Spreading a sense of inferiority over natives and minorities.
And I’m not just talking historically, because these issues persist presently.
Change can’t happen unless one is willing to **** the teet of the majority.
For we live in world that separates based off of hierarchy.
That strips down and overgeneralizes our identities.
Then when one overcomes these disparities they are seen as the unordinary.
The exception to the rule,
Like *** is that supposed to mean?
Think I’m about to lose my sanity, dealing with an uneducated narrow minded humanity.
In a state bombarded with atrocity after atrocity,
Yet people have the audacity to tell us to get over it instantly.
Living in a democracy that doesn’t have time to listen to me,
Living in a world where history repeats,
Perhaps I guess we just can’t get enough of insanity.
It just doesn’t make sense to me?
I thought we were supposed to be evolved,
Yet be so devolved mentally.
Like how can indigenous people asking for clean water cause so much controversy?
For if your province or city didn’t have access to clean water, wouldn’t you worry?
Wouldn’t you start protesting firmly?
All I ask is that yawl start checking your privilege homie.

Hook:
***** water all through these streets,
***** water poisoning what we eat,
***** water flooding the mind,
Poisoning how we think.
***** water all through these streets,
***** water poisoning what we eat,
***** water flooding the mind,
Gotta be careful what ya drink.

Verse 2:
Water is the foundation to survival,
Water can also be a philosophical symbol,
For we all thirst for something,
It’s like we are cursed or something.
Being immersed into desensitization,
Becoming numb to everything.
Needing to wash away what is obstructing.
Blocking the path towards transformation.
As established norms perpetuates discrimination.
Whilst also justifying racism and condemnation.
I didn’t choose to born,
But yet that some how qualifies me for damnation.
Because my skin colour is seen as being sinful, that needs to be put through sanitation.
Becoming guilty on the basis of association.
Which makes it harder to find the equation.
As everyone has different values, beliefs and expectations for how to fix this situation.
***** water sure is a contamination,
Thats been leaking out since creation.
That has divided not just people but also nations.
If only people could be mature when having these debates and conversations.
Instead of suffocating on our offence,
Or wallowing within a sense of victimization.
****, this ***** water sure has damaged how we function.

Hook:
***** water all through these streets,
***** water poisoning what we eat,
***** water flooding the mind,
Poisoning how we think.
***** water all through these streets,
***** water poisoning what we eat,
***** water flooding the mind,
Gotta be careful what ya drink.