We all want to be sane
But what is sane
it seems like a long game
Of torture, you're  put in
this box that is filled with
dought, hate, stress, looking different like sand that shapes to your body that you can't escape


The art of being sane is always to lie
You lie till you start to put on stress
so you start to eat and cry and then you
feel sick and they misdiagnosed you and you
are put into this tank of death that you drown yourself in
then you cut the hate and depression temporarily till you see me and I see you when we see it all is amazing

Live how you want to die how you want but just but
I need your company to hold me tight
so that I squeeze to tight till the love that I feel for you
Is magnified to the highest level  but then I push you away
and everyone else till alone with my suicidal thoughts that i
can't  escape then I slip into the darkness of my thoughts of you
but then you push me away too that is why we never speak to each other anymore

Then we meet again down the line of remembrance
but you look so different that I bearly remember the
sweet girl, I met in junior high that is the love that I lost
when I lost you but I do remember those little dimples in your
soft cheeks I miss that love I had with my first love of death
That is who you are to me now not my love nor my hate




                                                            ­       -Bye my lovely death

I wake up beside you thinking of what happened to me and why am I with you and will this pain ever stop well I tell my friend of how much of a hunk you are and how lucky I am to have you those are all lies I wish I never met your sorry *** and I could have been the person that I wanted. But then you come home and you hold me tight till I fall for you again and again. Then I see you bat your eyes at those ***** but I have to stay the perfect quite broken wife that you make me our son is becoming you and when I fight back you say your sorry for what you have done and  I lick my lips with dought and kiss you and then I see you talk to your friends and you say how much of a ***** I am to you and this is the way I feel about you. *******.

Hello, I'm Chris, I'm short, a little crazy
But that is who I am
this might be the first time seeing me so let me start off fresh.

I was born on September 09, 2004 That makes me a Virgo I never knew what that meant and I still don't know what means but that is one part about me I also a 13 and happy sometimes mainly when I'm eating that is why I look like this but I love my self but that I never ever did that when I was young but when I was seven. I found out liked plus size girls and I always was teased about that but then I started carrying a lot of depression and I lost my self.

But then when I started gaining myself back I found out that I  was bisexual and I got so scared thinking about how I would tell my family about me and who I am and then I met karebear that helped me and I fell all over again and I have changed for the better.


That is my life so far but other things about me are that I love to write my pain out like I always do I'm usually suicidal from being lonely and I hate meeting new people that is me and my life but I have a soft spot for women because. I was born I a house of women  


I've lied so much to the point that I can't trust myself. I have cut my self and that is me that is me I also love dogs, cookies, cake and writing I talk at the wrong time and don't talk when I need to a hate mean people I have kissed no one. And I love pizza like a lot that is me.

Today I cry
thinking how I will die
from all of this stress that strangles me till I cant breath and I cry when I see happiness he loves to play games and that is all he won't help cure me this is how I pop the sleeping pills like smarties till I see darkness then that doesn't help and I cut and scream for someone to hear me but no one knows whats  wrong

with me it feels like I 'm  a piece of trash that gets kicked around till I slip and then I see you but they find me and hide me till I'm better or what they think that is why I cry for you and that is me this is my story my mom puts me away like a doll and makes me the poster boy but that is not me that is the soul that took over

my body to **** me so that they could have the perfect life those are my suicidal thoughts I love myself but they don't want me too they need my Demons to hold me down and make me drown so that I don't wake up from the dream I'm stuck in it.







Hello my love or are you
You call me beautiful but
You Lie till I don't see you
The you that used be the cute
Girl with long hair that

I used to know how we don't talk that much
I say hi and you leave me alone till I don't feel
It anymore and I tell my friends about how you changed
They say that you have changed but they don't acknowledge It    
I miss you I know that you miss me too.

Well here I am
Alone Again After This, I will maybe die a lonely death that is never known I will love that so that I don't have any cheap perfume that chokes me to the point that I can't hide from the pain.




Today is the day of  no return I will be missed or I may not I don't Care about life anymore this is my sense of happiness none I hope that all who hurt me die like I will too




Well here I Am Alone But happy I am a man of no words I am you-you are me we are all lonely till we die we are now nothing but trash goodbye life and death I'm now noting but rubish Now I'm back to live a horrible hell-bound life.

Chris Allen
I'm a color that is a being colored black
not like the big man even cares he just wants
to blacken me until I'm nothing I hate the way
you look at me like I 'm going to steal your purse I'm not what you think
I am your worse nightmare an educated color that is strong.
I hide till you find me
I'm  White
I'm Black
I'm Every color that you think
But when they see me they look and ask me questions that I cant do this and I let go until you push me down on the floor that  I can't do this I want to change color but then I see my ancestors telling me not to let go I've marched in chains to marching with Martin Luter King. I've become the president. I help the world by helping my colors become a person, not a color we are not colors

We are people, not Men or women, NOT WHAT YOU THINK I AM ME.