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Logan Cestare Feb 2019
I did what they told me to,
I followed my heart,
But, in the same process,
I lost my mind.
Logan Cestare Feb 2019
Thorns 'round my heart
And this weight on my soul
One day I last longer
One day I lose control

Draining my energy
Till I'm left lying
On the bed for hours
I shouldn't be trying

To hold on to anyone else
Is to lose a part of myself
'Cause in the end they all leave me
Just an empty bottle on the shelf

And through everyone that's left
I can call this silver blade my friend
A temporary distraction
'Til I reach my very end

I want people to care
Lemme tell you, I do
But everyone'll just pass me by
And I don't doubt even you

Will someday be another one
That I let see me down
But instead of helping you packed your bags
And walked out of my town

Unable to scream,
Unable to fight
Time for me to give up
I've used up all of my might

These vines growing stronger
Keeping me all *******
My will to go on further
You've taken from my cup
Logan Cestare Feb 2019
Bloodletting is such a medieval practice
You used to think that opening up your skin
Will rid you of any sickness you have?
Then again, Who am I to judge?
I do the same thing for sicknesses in my own mind
It's an even less effective solution,
But I feel that it works.
Even just for a short bit.
Logan Cestare Feb 2019
Driving down the highway
The rain is pouring
The traffic is building
The drops pitter patter on the rooftop

But ahead
A bridge
If I reach it
I’ll be fine

Under it’s calmer
As I wait beneath this cover
It’s almost peaceful
It’s almost silent

But, Alas
The traffic will clear
And I’ll have to leave
The bridge that brought me peace

And as the wheels leave
The solace of the bridge
The rain hits
A little harder now

It’s all louder than it was before
More chaotic
More painful
The rain booms now all around
Logan Cestare Feb 2019
Honestly, I'd take a bullet for anyone.
At least it'd come with the closure of saving a life,
No matter which life it is.

Or maybe push someone away from a bus or oncoming car
Maybe take up firefighting or join the police force
Take on people thrice my size to let someone else away
Put myself in whatever danger's way to save others

And that's the thing about me.
I don't value my life. My life means nothing if I'm not saving others.
I'd trade my life to anyone in need, cause odds are,
They value theirs more than I value mine.

One day I hope I'll be able to step up in one of these ways
Because dead men share no intents.
They'd call the intents heroic and selfless
While I know the intents as suicidal and selfish.
Logan Cestare Feb 2019
Without trust, sorry means nothing.
No amount of 'sorry' will repair the trust you took
The advantages you've taken
The promises you've broken

I know that when you say sorry,
You'll just go back to doing the exact same thing
Again and again.

So just save your sorries and pity for someone else
Because I'm not gonna keep taking it.
Logan Cestare Feb 2019
I keep telling myself that I've gotten stronger.
Because I've gone one more day without you.

But, with every 'One More Day'
Comes one more cut, one more missed meal.

Because I still think of you, all the time.
And it hurts all the time

One more time you cross my mind
One more time my mind in a wreck

It's scary, you still have so much power over me
And you don't even know it.
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