I never thought you were meant to be in my life forever. Maybe that's why it didn't hurt to let you go. Once, I thought maybe we could be pretty good, we could work, but that wasn't the way it ended up. I still wonder how you're doing now, even after all you did to me. I hope you're okay. I will never find the answer myself because, I never will seek it out. We're apart, I have to let go now.

Yeah, we're crazy. I thought that's what was supposed to be of young love. Just, crazy, for no reason at all. Maybe that's how we make each other, I know it's how you make me. Sometimes you make me so crazy, I shake. Sometimes you make me so crazy, in a bad way. It's a good balance. The thing I find really crazy is that when I look out into the water, I see the gentle ripple of life in it, it makes me speechless, it makes me smile, it's something that simply can't be explained. Somehow, a feeling I never thought I could feel with anything else, I feel that way when I look into your deep blue eyes, and I can almost imagine the ripples within. Once again, I'm speechless, and I smile.

It's so simple, but so amazing. The safety you can feel in one's embrace. I hadn't seen you for awhile, no, it wasn't very long but somehow it felt like forever. When I seen you, I do not know if my breath hitched or if my heart skipped a beat, because all I could see was you and that beautiful smile. Then you hugged me, you pulled me close and simply whispered in my ear, "You miss me, don't you? I know you do." I nodded and closed my eyes, the two seconds encounter felt like a lifetime, a lifetime of peace and safety, and security. As we parted ways all I wanted to say was, please just hug me again.

When she walked in and exclaimed "WHY" I couldn't answer, for I was already dead.

You don't need to bother her.
Yes, maybe you feel like you'll break down, you're anxious, you don't feel alone, you're waiting for the hallucinations to start playing their games.again.
Just breathe, because you'll be fine.
Yes, you want to run to her, you want to say, "I'm not okay, and I need you right now." But knowing that'll only bother her you decide against it.
You just close your eyes and try to go back to sleep with a lump in your throat and a prayer for tomorrow, and you think of her and ignore the fearful tears that fall down your cheeks.
You know she'd care, but you fear she wouldn't and you would only bother her, despite her words.
And you sleep alone, uncomfortable, unsettled.