My black-eyed sparrow’s lost again I miss his wistful tune,
My brown winged sparrow’s gone again I hope he comes back soon.
My red beaked sparrow helps me through my anger and my pain
But my lonely little sparrow is lost out in the rain

When you thought that I was smiling,
You misidentified,
Because the clenching of my teeth was just me biting on the lie,
The line between insanity and endless sorrow,
Between the reaching for my yesterday and yearning for tomorrow,
Between filling myself with poetry or keeping myself hollow,
But none of this will matter when I catch my joyful sparrow.

Black roses dying,
Dark beauty surrounding them,
Fading to ashes,

White water lilies,
Floating in the blinding sun,
Shadows in the depths,

Time walking past us,
The seconds ticking by us,
5,4,3,2,1,

Sleep embracing me,
Cold lips Kissing me Goodnight,
The start of the end,

Black water lilies,
Walking past me 3,2,1,
I lie down and sleep.

When you
Speak
My soul
Shakes
Your gaze
Trails
On my skin like Fingertips.
And as the hours
Tick
The sky darkens and
The silence
Is deafening
Filled with whispered thoughts we only
Think
And don’t
Say
All we do is behave
And
We follow
These
Rules that
You make for
Tomorrow.
I ask when
You ask why
I ask how
You say hi
I won’t stay
If you cry
‘Cause you want me to lie
Come with me
To one side
I’ll
Explain to the sky all
Your
Tears all
Your pain.
Then I’ll ask you again.

Fragments of time,
Numbing my mind,
It grips my body,
Keeps me behind,
And lost in the mirror,
I see a disguise,
That’s hiding the hurt found deep in my eyes,
A veil,
A trail,
To lead to the pain,
The light,
A fight,
To keep me sane,
Trying to breathe,
Trying to think,
Then it all draws back,
I pause,
I blink,
Safe for now,
No longer a track,
No longer a trace of the panic attack.

I used to write my secrets in the sand.
Knowing that they would never stay long enough to make themselves known.
Covered by the wind.

I used to walk through life.
Fading when I could,
Drifting through my multiverse of colours.
Alone, trapped with my silence,
Afraid to speak.

But life goes too fast to keep yourself closed.
So I opened.

Before today, I've never
Let the current take me
Under and feel what it's like
To always come back with something.
To always come back breathing.