Gallantly riding along with my sidekick Gandolf, bold and strong, 'ride or die' t'il his hoofs fall off'.
Onwards we journey throughout the finally quite valley, silencing all the wild, yal stuck in a 'blind alley'.
Pondering back in memories around a campfire, a time once I was wreckless and robbing moonshiners.
I smell the wood burning and the embers crackling. reminiscing old days before I was backtracking.
Twiddling my doorknob mustache I wish I had. Bar fights and gun slings, in my side tipped hat.
I'm on the run now Sherriff can't catch me, were out stomping ground, like it's a stampede.
Found myself in a bind, with my cantine, and my satchel, been wanted an outlaw, for slaughtering you cattle.
Rode all night with a bunch of drunken bandits, tried to cheat me in poker, but I was left handed.
See I cleared all this land, with 44's to their chests, most precise 'bar slinger' this side of the west.
Spitting 'bars' in a saloon now that's a new style, try and crowd around me, I'll exit you out of existence, single file.
Your 'rowdy cowboys' smell of cigars, *****, and perfume. I'll hang you out back without dignity of a tomb.
Ringo, Django, Buffalo Bill, I don't concern with who you are, and that's the real deal.
Status means nothing to a revolving gun, my mind is my weapon, so I hope you can run.
You go to hell, you go to hell and you die, don't fret old pals, I'll sing your wife and kids goodnight,
kiss them and tuck them in for you, ignoring her cries for me to 'just spare her one true'.
I must be so fortuitous, unless I'm just not new at this, nah, I've done this numerous.
I heard them call out ' drinks on me' well if you would stop spilling it, and hitting on Bonnie.
Where the **** is Clyde, banging a *******, I'd kick his teeth out with my combat cowboy boots.
Why the **** is everyone so 'Bonnie and Clyde' robbing banks and fleeing, with a two faced ***** by your side.
Yeah they got your sides, while shooting you in the back, staring at your face, you hit the pavement then...smack..
Hard cold reality hits you in the face, undermined my intensity, my emotions enrage.
I'll burn your whole town you son of a witch, now hop along Cassidy, you flipped off the wrong switch.
I walk into this new place, everyone stops, they know who I am, but their jaws about to drop.
I take off my trench coat, revealing curves, what this cowboy, is really a her.
Taking my hat off, my pinned hair falls, hiding my face so they can't see my flaws.
They gasp in shock, who is this gal, this lady?
Whistling a tune, to the real Hello Daisy.