Its the way You turn and look Straight into my soul The way you caress The steering wheel Like its my face The way the sun Seems to radiate Off of you And you ask me "Why are you smiling Like an idiot?"
Let me sleep in peace for once Let me not feel this way ever again Let me have the strength to carry on Let me find my way in this world Let me see who I really am
I keep asking for these things And no god answers my calls But I can't blame any of them though I don't even answer my own soul
Sometimes I Wonder if Nothing that Has happened To me Did happen Would I Be different Maybe better Offered salvation Everything that I'm not Guess I Won't know
I write sometimes And feel like My own audience I read And re-read Until I finish Then I look at my words And sometimes I throw roses And sometimes I throw tomatoes
I hate the calm And yet exude it Appearing aloof And yet pulling my hair out When things appear fine And I know they aren't I suppose it's because "In a quiet pool, the devil dwells."
Can I be honest now? Not like you care anyways Have I made you proud? Had to sell my soul Just to make it out I lived in your hell Changed and yet I still drink From the poisoned well
felt like i lived and died for your love and acceptance always suffocating gasping for your words racked up so many wounds when you were holding me since then i wish i could say that things have changed oh how they haven't still waiting for the day i hear you even softly mutter that i'm enough
For those who have stuck around I should be grateful Yet often I've been wounded By those who are close and dear Their intentions virtuous And their results malicious All comes back to If familiarity mattered Water wouldn't boil a fish
I would say thanks for showing me your truly colors I would say thanks for showing me where the line is I would say thanks for showing me what love isn't I would say thanks
I want to change I swear I do But it can't Be a condition Set on a timeline Cause I thought You fell in love with me For who I am Not knowing who I'd become
I curse my apathy It will be the death of me Want to hide in the darkest cave Where no one will dare to save Clearly lacking in all possible departments My heart just one of many empty compartments
Haven't been myself But who am I kidding I don't even know who I am I want you to stay Want you to leave I'm hoping I'm forever And hoping you realize I'm not it You call it sabotage I call it suicide Is it honesty do you think? Depression or regression Either way I don't like this Don't pick me up You wouldn't understand Please I just want to bleed Don't let me drown Please I just want to breathe You know this need I know I'm ****** up Won't even deny it Do what you have to Say what you want I can't believe it nor want to I love you coming off your lip Fifty fifty but please No coin flip
This soul has found No rest These eyes have seen Horrors beyond belief These hands are covered In blood that is not theirs These legs won't hold For much longer Please be there I'm counting on you.
Gave my breath To what I had left In the dark with a cigarette An empty bed And just one barrette I hope you get some rest Gave you my best I know I won't forget Our melancholic duet
Sitting here In a hotel In Albuquerque In Awe Of how we got here It really is just A series of chances Events that dictate Outcomes As you sleep I Am granted The time to realize I like this outcome So far.
The intro to a new series following the Number Series
I has't been F'rgotten in Flowers Drossy in Pardon And Fearful of Fate I has't nay events I consid'r F'rtuitous Many I consid'r Fruitless And few to none Fulfilling
Lost in your eyes Akin to standing In a field of wheat The curves in your face Reminds me of something like Venus de Milo I focus so desperately On things like that And everytime I reminisce I get lost just to Lose a little bit more