I blink
And age another few years

I watch as family grows
Older, and more distant

I watch as friends come, and go
I have no control over them

I watch as I try to keep myself together
Try not to just scream everything inside me away

I blink
And age another few years

And see the same things
Happen all over again

The flames grow
And grow
        And float
                Above the clouds

I can watch and stare
As long as I please
Though I know
I'll never catch one

If I catch one
My hand will set ablaze
And It will hurt me, and burn me
          Untill
                   I
                     Am
                          No
                              More
Than a simple pile of ash

I can't speak to you
Or disagree with you
I have to nod my head
In agreement with you

I want to tell you
     "I don't believe that"
       "I support that"
         "But that is okay"

Instead I nod my head and say to you
        "Yeah"
                   "I know right"
        "It's not okay"

The flames are my thoughts
And my truest, deepest feelings

My hand is my courage
To open up

You are my head
My whole being
Not letting me

And I let you do that to me

You may ask why I don't confess
Or fight for my beliefs
But I promise you, I can't
Because I don't want my own family to hate me.

I can sleep, and sleep
And dream all I want
But will I ever reach that dream
Will what I do be enough?

I can look, and look
At the people on the street
And I can see them
But can they see me?

I can listen, and hear
The cars passing by
The music from the skies
But will anyone hear me as I try, and try?

I can feel, and touch
Everything soft
And be happy
But will what I write touch someone's heart?

I want to help, I want to understand
And this may sound selfish
And maybe it is
But can someone help me too?

Because I just wanna help you..

I'm tired of people
I'm tired of hearing

I'm tired of feeling
I'm tired of seeing

I'm tired of turning
Everything upside down

I'm tired of life
And tired of feeling down