2021 is a lot like 2018
the anxieties and worries have been constantly lurking again
sleeping felt like an escape to the cruel mind
am I supposed to be this way forever?
If only we can erase thoughts, I'd erase all the negative ones.

I am getting tired.

It seems like time is mocking me now.
I've been feeling sick since February.
And that feeling has been multiplying as days go by.
I hope everyone's praying for better days to come.
I don't know until when I can get through this.
Therefore I am asking for your prayers too. ❤️

I adore you like thorns of roses
You give me love like drops of hail
I long for your gifts of sweet bruises
Just **** me now my dear Abigail

I always have the idea of falling inlove with you
Not just because you are an epitome of beauty and kindness
But because you bear the rare quality of a man worth falling for

I have built my love for you in shadows
Shadows of pureness and sincerity
Sincerity of feelings and admiration
Admiration of your beauty and beyond
Beyond all of these are still shadows
Shadows of my love
Love that will remain hidden
Hidden by another shadow of your one true love

I’d like to be happy once in a while
Deaf from the loud criticisms
And blind from the high physical standards

In which happiness is seeing your true naked self
Embracing your hidden flaws and long lists of imperfections

I wonder if you would still love me
When I’ve grown old and ugly

Lord I surrender everything to you. I know you will give what my heart desires. Thy will be done my Lord ❤️

Para sa taong lihim kong minamahal
“Maging akin ka sana” aking munting dasal
Pag-ibig ko sayo’y lumalalim habang tumatagal
Mahalin mo lang ako pangako hindi ako magiging sagabal

Masyado na bang luma ang ihalintulad ka sa isang bituin?
Kita ko pero di ko kayang abutin
Tanaw ko pero kailanman di magiging akin
Oo, Tanggap ko yun kahit dala nito’y sugat na malalim

Sana nga naging bulag nalang ako
Para di na ko tuluyang nahulog sa’yo
Pero paano ba yan tao lang din naman ako
Nagmamahal rin kahit alam kong hanggang ganito na lang tayo

Hindi ka naman siguro manhid para di mo randam
Para di mo maintindihan at di malaman
Sadyang di mo lang talaga kayang masuklian
Ang pagmamahal na matagal ko nang inaasam-asam

Sabi nga nila tanga raw ako
Umaasa ng pagmamahal sa isang katulad **** wala namang planong mahalin ang isang katulad ko
Eh anong magagawa ko?
Malalim ang pagkakahulog ko sa’yo
At tila ba nalulunod na ako sa pagmamahal na ito
Na kahit di na ako makaahun basta’t alam kong mahal, nandyan ka lang sa tabi ko

Pero alam kong hanggang pangarap nalang ito
Alam kong kahit kailanman di magiging totoo
Kasi may iba kang mahal at hindi yun ako
Kasi kahit magunaw man ang mundo
Mahal, alam kong di magiging tayo

Ngano kaha gihigugma gihapon tika
masking nawala na imong paghigugma sa akoa?

Ngano kaha gipangga gihapon tika masking wala na ka ganahi sa atoa?

Ngano kaha gahandum gihapon ko nga ikaw ug ako gihapon
masking ako nalang ang gapugong sa kung unsay naa ta?

Ngano kaha ikaw ug ikaw gihapon ang pirminte naa sa akong huna huna
masking kabalo kong dili na ako ang naa sa imuha?

Ngano kaha gagunit gihapon ko sa imong saad na ako ra
Masking kabalo kong naa nakay lain na mas angay muhigugma sa imuha?


Siguro ingon ani lang gyud ko mahigugma
Higugmaon gihapon tika masking sakit na kaayo para sa akoa

Siguro ingon ani lang gyud ang gugma
Sakit pero nahigugma raman ko nimo masking ikaw wa na nahigugma sa akoa

Kabalo kong walay taong bogo pero andam ko mabogo kung ang kapuli kay pagpabilin nimo sa akoa

Pero ug kalipay gyud nimo ang mubiya na
Andam nakong mubuhi sa atoa
Andam nakong buhian ka ug ihatag sa iya
Andam nakong ako nalang ug wa nay kita
Kay tungod ingon ana kadako akong paghigugma sa imuha

You are a mirror of grudge and hatred
In a world where the rich becomes richer
And the poor becomes poorer

I lost a key to a certain door
Where feelings of darkness never occur
Where tears and weary eyes are never experienced before
And life is something that everyone loves and adores

I'm starting to like you now

Not the typical "like" that I always feel

about someone whom I just like to be friends with

But the kind of "LIKE" that would possibly break

the walls I have built for so long

I just love to look at the stars at night
for they remind me of you
You who shines in your own light without caring how others
shine brighter than you
You who bears the beauty of my whole universe
You who always take my breath away
Others might not come to see it but as for me
No matter how many billions or trillions of stars
  fill up the sky
No star is as beautiful as you
No star twinkles as bright as you do
No star will ever take dominion over these eyes who only see the magnificent colors of light that shines inside you

Napakasarap magmahal
lalo na sa taong akala **** makakasama
mo na habang buhay

Napakasarap magmahal
lalo na sa taong akala **** itinadhana sa'yo
at mamahalin ka ng lubos at tunay

Napakasarap magmahal
lalo na sa taong akala mo di ka iiwan
kasi sapat ka na para mundo niya'y
mabigyan ng kulay

Napakasarap magmahal
lalo na sa taong akala mo hindi ka matatakot
mabulag kasi siya yong magsisilbing
gabay at patnubay

Napakasarap magmahal
Lalo na kung ang lahat ng ito
ay naging totoo
at hindi lang humantong sa pala-palagay

I am looking forward to meet you soon
Where all the music around us are in perfect tune
In a perfect place of a truly happy afternoon

We are a flower that is never meant to bloom

An instrument that will never be in tune

And a light that will never be enough to banish the gloom

Masama ba talagang magmahal ng sobra-sobra?
Yung tipong lahat ng oras mo ibinibigay mo na sa kanya
Yung tipong pati buhay mo ibubuwis makita mo lang sya

Masama ba talagang magmahal ng sobra-sobra?
Yung tipong nagbubulag-bulagan kana kahit alam
mo'ng ginagago ka na niya
Yung tipong nagbibingibingihan kana kahit alam **** wala nang sagot na "Oo mahal din kita"

Masama ba talagang magmahal ng sobra-sobra?
Yung tipong kahit ang sakit-sakit na pero pilit mo paring iniinda kasi tumitibok ang puso mo hindi para sa iba
kundi para lang sa  kanya
Yung tipong halos lumuhod kana sa harap niya
huwag lang syang lumayo sayo at humanap ng iba

Masama ba talagang magmahal ng sobra-sobra?
Yung sobrang-sobra na pero parang kulang pa
Yung sobrang-sobra na pero iniwan ka parin niya
Yung sobrang-sobra na pero pinagpalit ka parin sa iba
Yung sobrang-sobra na pero heto ka ngayon kasama ng mga luha mo dahil nga nagmahal ka ng SOBRA-SOBRA

Masyado nang luma ang ihalintulad ka sa isang bituin

Kita ko pero di kayang abutin

Tanaw ko pero kailanman di magiging akin

Araw-Gabi paulit-ulit binalak limutin,
mga tamis ng ala-alang pinagsamahan natin
Araw-Gabi pinilit kong baguhin,
mga nakasanayang tingin mo sa akin
Araw-Gabi binubulong na sana'y dalhin,
bawat pangungulila ko sayo ng agos ng dagat at ihip ng hangin
Araw-Gabi hinihiling, na sana handa na akong tanggapin
Na ako'y hindi na para sayo, at ika'y hindi na rin para sa'kin.

I am in a rock bottom this time.
Not sure about what's ahead of me, not sure whether I'd continue breathing or just stop to end the pain. Thinking about how you've given your best but still it wasn't enough and never will be. Do I live my life to fail? or Do I fail to live?

Winter's about to end, yet I haven't still gathered enough courage to accept your coldness.

Why would you chase someone who only gives you a mere stone, when there is someone willing to give you a precious diamond?

In this world full of insecurities, I will be the one to bring you confidence. In this world full of lies, I will be the one to bring you pure honesty. In this world full of hesitations, I will be the one to bring you courage, and in this world where you experience pain, I will be the one to bring you love.

Minsan na akong nangarap maging akin ka
Maging akin ka at ang mapupungay **** mga mata,
Maging akin ka maging ang iyong luha ng pighati't ligaya

Maging akin ka di lang sa panaginip
Hindi rin dahil hiniling sa langit
Maging akin ka dahil gusto mo ako at oo gustong gusto kita

Pero kahit parang suntok sa buwan , at ang pangarap ay mananatiling pangarap man
Ang panaginip ay mananatiling panaginip lang,
Sana bukas paggising ko ikaw naman ang magsasabing "pwede ba tayo nalang?"

When you're tired of making memories with me, please don't hesitate to tell the truth. It will surely hurt  and tear me inside, at least we are setting each other's hearts free from agony and lies.

I was about to fall, I was about to put my guards down, I was about to believe that it was just okay, it will be just fine, everything will fall into its perfect places. But then suddenly the wind changes its direction, I wasn't ready, I wasn't prepared. That's when the whole became pieces and the skies became grey again.