Whether or not I fell
is not the question.
The question is:
Did I land on my feet?

Too early to tell
Haven’t reached the ground
I’ll let you know
When I’m all the way down.
For now as I’m falling
I’ll grab onto limbs
To break my descent
Before the light dims.

A colorful collection of blood and tears
Wouldn’t be found for many years
Stare me down as my wound sears
Cut my name with sharpened shears

Claw my eyes,
I’m already blind.
Rip out my heart,
It’s already sliced.
Burn up my lungs,
The breath’s already gone.

Love already did this to me.

I feel like the world is kinda against us.
From the beginning
everything happened
To make sure we weren’t together.
Now
while we finally are
Everything happens to make sure we aren’t together.
You said it’s not the world against us,
But it’s us against the world.
But why can’t the world just agree.
Why can’t the world be as happy as we
When we’re together.
I don’t believe in coincidence.
Which is unfortunate,
my life would be so much easier if everything
Was
Just a coincidence.
But
Then again
Maybe the world wants to make sure
That in the future
When we face these challenges
We’ll be okay.
Maybe the world is just making sure
That in the end
We really will last.
Maybe.
It’s all just maybe.
Whether or not it’s the world against us
Or us against the world.
Something is against another.

P.s. The world won and so did you, but somehow, I lost Everything.

Blank note
          Is what my notebook reads.
Blank mind
          Is what my mind will tease.
Blank tongue
          Is what my mouth seeks.
Blank look
          Is how my face is seen.
Blank heart
          Is what my body needs.
Blank slate
          Is when the blades will bleed.

Pain is a temptress
Dressed in all black.
Looming over
Whats not coming back.
Wearing her own mask
While she pulls out her flask.

She didn’t know
It would end this way.
But who can know
The end to a chess game.

Move your king
But I’ll take your queen.
Hide your knights
But I won’t be seen.
A king is nothing
Without his queen
Therefore I’ll steal
What you’ve never dreamed.

Where do you think
You can hide?
Im telling you now
You can’t mask your pride.

Pain is a temptress
Dressed in rags.
Her charm shining through
Her silver flask.

A beautiful girl
Taken for a fool.
But what you don’t know
Is that you’re the tool.

A pawn in her game
Winning just the same.
She’s smarter than you
She knows all your
escape routes.

Don’t dare tell her
To leave you alone.
She’ll just tell you
This is your new home.

I hate that my support system
Needs my support.
I can’t help someone else
If I can’t help myself.
I can’t cry for me
I’m expected to cry for you.
When I cry you say it’s gonna be okay.
When you cry I say the same
Only you say it’s ******* and I’m making it up
You say I’ll never know enough
When have I ever lied to you.
Why do I have to believe you
But you can’t believe me.
When I show you the cuts on my wrist
You say I’m stupid
yeah, I get the gist.
When you show me the cuts on your wrist
I kiss them and say I love all of you.
And you sit there and cry
Telling me I don’t understand.
So we cry together
Mourning different things.
You mourn life.
While I mourn my sanity.

Her childhood would’ve been documented under the stars in the sky.
But they wanted media to be her whole entire life.
She’s young now
But when she’s old,
Everyone will already know
The stories she once told.
Every one will remember
Better than herself.
There are no secrets
When no secrets are kept on the shelf.
She will watch herself grow up
But so will everybody else.
Everyone sees happiness
When all she sees hell.
Who knows?
Only time will tell.
Maybe someday she’ll be happy
in her shell.
Painted and decorated by the eyes of others.
People who will never know the struggles of her mother.
Maybe one day she’ll see the sunlight.
Instead of the shining camera spot light.