A poem shows how I feel
Expresses me
So why are there words on this page?
I'm writing to express a blank page.
Words growing across a barren plane.
Thoughts forced through an empty mind.

A bacteria
A Virus
Sickness
Illness
It comes at you
you don't expect it
Something so small
Invisible
Keeps you from living
Yet we still don't believe
Depression is a sickness
But something so small it can't be seen
Is slowly killing me
I can't leave bed
I can't focus
I can't unfocus
And it gradually
Painfully
Makes me smaller
Shrinking
Until I too am just a bacteria
A small
Invisible
Nothing
Infectious and causing no good

A shower to wash you off
Water to wipe the tears
Steam to cloud your memory
A shower is the remedy

In both hands I hold my life
In one hand my bible
The other holds a knife

Yin and yang
The dark and the light
The good and the bad
Dusk and dawn

The gray.

The in between.

The undefined.

You can explain to me
The right and the wrong.
But tell me
What about the gray?

We fought for hours
You bought me flowers
I never asked for diamonds
I didn't ask for much...
I got them anyway...
But you still didn't stay.

So now the roses are dying
You're baby is crying
But where are you now?

Does she listen to you scream?
Are you everything she dreamed of?
Do you buy her flowers?
Or give her diamonds?
Tell her she's everything,
Did you tell her about me?
And how...

The roses are dead
your baby got no dad
You left us all alone
And I'm stronger on my own.

I am
A single drop of water.
Falling,
Falling silently.
Awaiting to break apart when I hit the ground.
To shatter
Into so many small bits
So far apart
No one will even notice
I ever existed.