Finding reasons to run,
Faster, stronger, better, smarter.
Living the dream.
Resorting to relaxation.
Within the loudest scream,
Wishing to dream,
Reasons to scream,
Nothing is what it seems.
Floating through my stream,
Till my heart naturally cleans
Without selfish steam.
******* irrational frustration
Living beneath consistent injustice restriction,
Power hungry pigs
Getting off from constriction
Of an innocent prediction.
Jun 8, 2016
Jun 8, 2016 at 1:50 AM UTC
When I first saw into her pain, I was elated;
finally someone else so numb they're sedated.
We stayed up all night little past five, off eachother were wasted
She was the friend of the girl I liked but couldn't get to hold onto
Next thing I knew I was up in her headspace, and she was the next case
for this lovesick therapist kid still getting his head straight
Crazy how life is meant for love, but all you need is yourself
One minute she loves you the next
You're set up on the shelf
How does it feel to waste your time,
over and over?
How does it feel to live for other peoples lonely vies?
Now how does it feel to be surrounded,
over and over?
How does it feel to know you can't reach out and touch their souls?
How does it feel to know I've gone, without being here to start with?
How does it feel to know you've chosen wrong?
You're wrong
I'm right
And now I'm torn on what love is, I think it'd be this.
Cause playing guitar is much better than these hardened hearts.
We stayed up all night, little past five
pointing out our marks and scars
She was the girl of the friend I liked
She said he was family
Next thing I knew, she's tellin' me
she's chosen someone I can't be
This lovesick masochistic kid's now starin' at Plan B..
Seems like life seems so perfect
when we're staring at surface ****
One minute it's all planned so right
the next you're praying to your christ.
So how does it feel to waste your time,
over and over?
How does it feel to live for other people's dumb opinions?
How does it feel to be surrounded,
over and over?
How does it feel to know you can't kiss off the memories?
Now how does it feel to know I'm gone, never to come back?
How does it feel to know you've chosen wrong?
You're wrong
I'm right
I'm wrong
You're right
I'm right
I'm wrong
They're right
I'm song..
Jun 3, 2016
Jun 3, 2016 at 2:04 AM UTC
Last night I melted into you -
Didn't I?
It felt like an eternity
It felt like a river flowing
Into an intense tranquility
Uncertainty tries to
unhing my sanity
But I know what I know
To be true
I flowed into you
Until we became one
And for once -
I didn't feel a lone
Because I knew -
I knew this is where
I belonged.
-
May 26, 2016
May 26, 2016 at 5:40 AM UTC
16... what an age
still sweet and innocent
but with the deadly secret
voices in your head
dark circles under your eyes
blood stained wrists
17 wont be much better
depression taking its toll
pain medication becoming
your best friend
hiding behind a smile
remember all those times
when you didnt care
what you looked like
or what you wore?
when you genuinely smiled
and laughed
those were the good times...
16.. and everyone knows you
the happy bubbly girl
with an amazing smile
and big brown eyes
17.. with the reputation
of local girl
who takes own life
no one knew she was depressed
until it was too late
unable to make it to
her 18th birthday.
a smile hides 1000 feelings
until its too late
until she is gone
and becomes news
on everyone's lips
May 26, 2016
May 26, 2016 at 5:36 AM UTC
I'd give you my soul,
If I had mine still..
My heart would be yours,
If it wasn't his..
I would open my mind for you,
If I hadn't locked it and thrown out the key..
I want to give you anyone everything.
But what I once had was taken forgranted.
It was passed around
Until misplaced.
I couldn't find it.
I didn't want to.
And when I did find it
There was only an empty me.
May 13, 2016
May 13, 2016 at 10:39 AM UTC
I can hear her
Her mesmerizing melodies calling me
Tempting me
I sway to her music
Fill my veins with her voice
And we are one again.
She covers me like a blanket
I can feel the warmth of her love
In my secret places
Its dark inside
And I'm afraid
But she is with me
Holding me
And I am safe.
When she leaves
My soul aches for her embrace
I hunger for her touch
I want to disappear
To leave her as she left me
But her lethal love injections
Are all that I know
And I am weak
And I can hear her
Her mesmerizing melodies calling me
Tempting me
I sway to her music
Fill my veins with her voice
And we are one again.
My lover wants me dead
But I have given her my heart
Sealed our love with a kiss
Till death do us part.
May 13, 2016
May 13, 2016 at 12:57 AM UTC
When the beating sun can't warm my clammy skin.
I am losing this **** fight.
I see her smirk, she knows what I know.
She alone can make me right.
And though I reap just what I sow,
I never thought my chest could feel so tight.
All at once I hear her say, "You can give up, That's okay."
I finally look into her eyes,
She who brought me to my knees.
Suddenly the fight within me dies.
I sink beneath her comfort seas.
May 13, 2016
May 13, 2016 at 12:55 AM UTC
I want to say yes,
My brain tells me no,
My heart's crying for it.
Just this one time,
There could be no stress.
If I could just do it again,
Just one time..
Maybe two times...
If I could just quit after that..
I deserve it.
I work so hard.
I pay all my bills.
I go to court.
I've redeemed control.
But my heart still doesn't feel whole.
It still wants to fade away,
Just for one day.
Please just this once,
I could still be okay.
But what if I don't live to see another day..
May 12, 2016
May 12, 2016 at 8:13 PM UTC
We were junkies
The **** water was the color of a hobbo's ****
May 12, 2016
May 12, 2016 at 3:29 PM UTC