Maybe, if I sit
still in this dark, finally
I can disappear...
Sep 6, 2021
Sep 6, 2021 at 12:31 AM UTC
I wish I could cry.
I want to cry so badly...
"I...
Wish I could grant you that release..."
...Just another pain in a sea of agony;
one in which you guide my hands to swim across...
One in which you assure I'll cross eventually, I'll find land eventually if I just keep swimming because there must be land, there must be...
"I'll even carry you on my back if I must,
when I sense you're getting tired,
eyes locked on the horizon,
until we can see the distant shoreline..."
I'll keep swimming in hopes that one day I'll finally agree with you, that there must be land somewhere...
Eventually...
But for as long as I tread in this sea of tears I cannot cry, a sea I tread with no end in my sight, foresight, or hindsight
For as long as I bathe in this anguish and pain I see no tangible end to,
at least I'll feel your presence nearby
Treading a little ways away,
pulling my hand and promising of Zion ahead,
of a place where the most water I'll have to handle
will be in a tub or a glass,
where the loving earth beneath my feet
won't move out from under my kicks and steps
in such petty and malicious ways as the water surrounding me,
pulling me deeper,
seeping into my very soul does.
"There must be land ahead...
**There must be....**
I'll swim down to the ocean floor and build you and island if I have to...
If only I knew how."
...
Jun 26, 2021
Jun 26, 2021 at 3:36 AM UTC
i shouldn't.
but i need it.
need
i've been clean for weeks.
the rotting hurts so bad i can't sleep.
rot
the straight red lines will rid me of this rotting in my stomach.
rid me of this agony.
agony
it hurts so bad i can't think.
my head is fogged over with pain.
fog
it hurts so bad i can't breathe.
i can't hear over the deafening red noise.
noise
i need the straight red lines to breathe.
i need the straight red lines to expel the rot.
i need the straight red lines to keep my sanity.
i need the straight red lines to make me feel whole.
i need the straight red lines.
so... i do what i know i shouldn't.
i buy what shouldn't be bought.
and with the click of the freshly opened pack,
finally...
i can breathe again.
click
...
I can breathe again.
Jan 11, 2021
Jan 11, 2021 at 2:06 AM UTC
As a nation of democracy
The nation of democracy
We’re entitled to equality
For we are the people.
Ignoring *** and identity
Race, age, spirituality
We demand sovereignty
For all of us people.
But…
A flaw dilutes our equality
Brought on by our shared history
A racist, oppressive legacy
From The State’s “first” people.
You would think by now we would be free
No more bias, people would see
That we all make up humanity
That we are all people.
Yet from racial violence, we still flee
Racist police brutality
Oppressive courts rule your skin guilty
Like we’re not all people.
So without equal “equality”
Some find the system so *****
They see one option for purity:
Demolish a people.
Not fight wrongs individually
Rather, destroy all they can see
But before we separate fully
They as well are people.
“The system’s too corrupt!” Is their plea
“We’ll cleanse it with brutality.
“Forget the cost, it will set us free.
“Freedom for us people!
“No matter pain and fear and frenzy
“Chaos and death and anarchy
“If it brings the System to its knees
“We will fight the people.
“No matter how ludicrous the fee
“This will free the people.
“...Right?”
Dec 17, 2020
Dec 17, 2020 at 3:42 PM UTC
I know you may die.
あいのゆめだ、we
can still dream of love.
Dec 16, 2020
Dec 16, 2020 at 12:51 AM UTC
I use my illnesses as an excuse to not do what needs to be done, to not do what I want to be done.
Careless.
I spent hours and hours on a project I love, but will likely never finish.
Yearning.
I went the whole week without finishing a single assignment.
Negligent.
I leave my hundreds of abandoned projects by the wayside, despite wanting to work on them all.
Distracted.
I dream of creating so, so much, but don't ever commit to something because it's not instantly gratifying.
Idiotic.
I wrote a poem about how awful I am for friends and strangers alike to see and pity me over.
Egotistical.
I told my parents that I did homework when I just lazed around all week.
Liar.
I waste money on food when there's food in the house.
Lazy.
I woke myself up too late at night with this poem in mind.
Irresponsible.
I want to **** myself sometimes.
Selfish.
Dec 14, 2020
Dec 14, 2020 at 12:59 AM UTC
"I love you," you say
But how you torture me when
You force me to live.
Nov 20, 2020
Nov 20, 2020 at 2:18 AM UTC