And then the day came,
when the risk
to remain tight
in a bud
was more painful
than the risk
it took
to Blossom.

months ago at this exact time
i found myself
pouring another cup of coffee
to continue a daydream of you
months ago at this exact time
i found myself
clinging to my phone
awaiting just a few words from you
with heavy eyes
and hopeful heart
months ago at this exact time
i found myself
discovering the dustiest corners
of your souls
one night at a time
months ago at this exact time
i found myself
daring to ask you how long
forever would be
with lit eyes
and hungry heart
months ago at this time
i never would have imagined
that months later at this exact time
you would be falling asleep
and i would be falling apart
because
our forever
wasnt what I wished for
months ago at this exact time

Said the little boy, "Sometimes I drop my spoon."
Said the old man, "I do that too."
The little boy whispered, "I wet my pants."
"I do that too," laughed the little old man.
Said the little boy, "I often cry."
The old man nodded, "So do I."
"But worst of all," said the boy, "it seems
Grown-ups don't pay attention to me."
And he felt the warmth of a wrinkled old hand.
"I know what you mean," said the little old man.

you
will
get
better
when
you
stop
convincing
yourself
of
what
isn't
real

You still left me.
I did everything to please you.
Everything was for you.
I took the extra time on my makeup so it was flawless in your presence.
An extra half hour of killing and taming my hair so it
Looked like beauty queen material
Just to hear you call me beautiful
And look at me the way you did when
You really felt good to be around me.
Several occasions, if you recall, I brought your favorite foods to you when you worked.
Just to see your face light up and
So you knew I would do anything to give you
What you wanted.
I don't remember a second I didn't spend
Thinking what more I could do for you.
I took three too many steps
Out of my comfort zone
Just to please you.
To give you what you wanted.
Even in my state of uncomfort,
I knew you still didn't care about my
Feelings. Truly care, anyways.
And all this time..
All this time of my extra efforts and going so far, far out of my way
You were still too selfish
To see past your small green eyes of confinement.
And I hope one day
You regret letting me leave.
You see how good I was to you.
Giving you the world and then some.
You were just too oblivious
To see what was good for you.
You let it go.
You let me go.
You kept wanting more and more.
And I didn't know what else could be done.
And I'm still sorry for not being able
To give you everything you
Wanted.
I hope one day you can
Feel the pain you
Put me through.