Oh, to sail upon the sea.
To brave that which so scares me,
To leave land and life behind,
To sever those ties that bind.

To experiance all those amazing places that I so want to SEE!
That will be something that will forever impact me.
But oh,
Can it happen?
I don't know!

I'm really sick in my body,
Even though I have never said,
It is true that at times I,
Who so loves life,
And beauty.
Have wished to be dead.

Sometimes it is hard to continue on,
But I CAN be strong.

Because I want to experiance those places,
To see,
The world,
The tropics,
Those places,
That make me hope and dream,
The sea and its steams,
There is so much to see!

Dear God,
My lord,
heal me,
Let me be healthy,
So that I can live my dreams,
And photograph,
And experiance,
All that is in my heart,
All that is me.

I want to feel hot white sand beneath my feat,
To stand underneath the Saharan sun,
to feel that great heat,
To Stand upon Rapau Nui,  
To FEEL that island beat,
I want to gaze upon the pyramids,
That are ages old,
To gaze upon greek statues of Zeus,
Marble and Gold.
To see forests,
Forever untouched by man,
To visit places,
Unique upon all the lands.

Seattle is my home,
From Father Mountains,
And Mother sea,
But I want to see those places that I always dream of.
Lord,
God,
Let me be free,
Let me healthy.

Or,
To hell with that,
Let me,
Be,
Tenacious enough,
To do what I dream of,
Anyway,
Good God,
Just let my spirit soar,
Let me see,
Let me Photograph,
Just,
LET ME BE FREE,
Just let me open my eyes to beauty,
and let me see.
(with camera in hand)
Long I stand,
Healthy or not,
Let it be known,
Life's,
God's,
Gaea's,
Great beauty,
I have sought.

Gone on too long,
This poem has rambled.
Dear lord,
Let me,
See.  

At the end of my days,
Be it months or years,
Let me see those mountains,
Seas,
Shores and streams,
Let me see those places,
that constantly show up,
That shine through my dreams.

Let me see,
With camera in hand.
Sick or healthy.
Every part of me,
Will do my damndest,
to fight,
To take pictures,
and to stand,

Upon those shores,
sands and streams,
that beckon me,
through my dreams.

i did have
a man i didn't know
came up behind talking of queensland
and riding the surf in cyclones drunk
he looked wasted
he was beautiful and so ******* scary weird
it was surreal
yeah it was frightening
he was not though in retro
i was thinking within gates
he was ok
blessed
and benign
gentle
and not quite there
childlike and on the loose
although he was happy striding into the waves
wet jeans and laughing
and who can diss that
under the moon and stars

Taking a chance in life can be hard,
You never know who to trust,
Who is going to be there for you,
Who is just going to be another let down.

But I decided to take a chance,
to take a chance on you,
and now i know it was the right one.

You taught me that Im better off without you,
Im stonger than I thought I was,
and I can be independent.

You didnt treat me right,
and I dont really blame you.
but now Im the one moving on,
while you're still holding on.

Wer is d love wer is d felling??
It's only alone dat m living,
no one bothers wat i do,
dey r simply ignoring me cuz dey wanna never knw wat i am going through,
and they push me to the fire as that's there only work and,
is the 1 of d worse thing the usualy do,
i cried soo much but the pain still is alive wid in me,
i want some 1 to free frome these,
hell life just a simple thing i want,
dat i wanna b happy and scrolled,
to nearby every person whom i think dat he/she,
can understand me and be,
help to make me upcome from m goin through,
but dey pushed me away as m a garbage and proved,
that they r heartless and make me cry again and again,
but still i find the person who bothers wat i feel,
and wat i have 2 do for my well fare and to increase the yield,
of happiest smiles but i still dont knw y i cry dat my eyes got red,
and all peoples aroun me see me as m a stupid and aprrox dead,
Person who iszz alway sad,
but m not a bad,
person as i knw and i always wanna keep others happy,
and

a drunken **** head knocking my door

a glimpse through my window my eyes saw more

a bald headed hunk covered in ink

heart beating so fast i couldnt think.

a drunken **** head coming inside

that wolvo accent helping me to decide

a kiss to my lips sealing my fate

an overnight stay by now it was too late.

two weeks of pure bliss passed so fast

gossiping folk saying we wouldnt last

soon there will be violence i heard them say

hiding their heads and shuffling away.

so what if hes commited violence before

hes with me now and i mean more

hes always assured me that hed never hurt me

his past is his past and that they will soon see.

friends in for drinks and that was the first time

me pulling faces getting ****** on red wine

but the ******* he saw me a reflection in glass

a punch to my nose i fell on my ****.

apologies kisses sorries never ending

me knowing it wont happen again or pretending

waking in the mornings treading on eggshells

me with experiance i should have known so well.

but do we learn women like us

hearing their words and giving our trust

thinking things will get better in time

when do we stop and draw a line.

broken cheek bones two black eyes

split open lips ****** thighs

bruises covering the surface skin

enternal bruising hiding within.

pregnant with your gorgeous son

look at what ive now become

trapped indoors head hangs in shame

its not my fault its you whos to blame.

all i done wrong was to show you love

you the man needed boxing gloves

to keep me tame and where you wanted me

under control to prove your credibility.

This experience of being alive
is only truly felt

when threatened.

experience is precious
gives a perspective
Unique to you

A family of five Hoodie Crows
lay siege to our small valley.
They command the whole panorama;
their calls can be heard everywhere.
They are clever. Do not trust Man,
they impart to their offspring,
handed down the generations.
A wisdom learnt through experience.

oh what a darkness of consistency
grows around this silence
that of a lonely sentence
fallen to earth by itself
offering hesitated thought
that which conceives, yet conceals
a deep misery
an unhappiness that blinds the eyes
that does in its silence circle like poisoned incense
around a badly carved pentangle
squeezing tears from the corners of clenched eyes
forming a violent trembling
from neck to ankles
its silent translation a feeeling
of immence tension vibrating through the body
Ah, this fallen silence
is the beauty that Isaw, I see
the change incredible that brings
this silenece to me rather that someone else
where bliss does come down
and envelope in a mist of passionate lips embrace
imersining itself in a liberating tumultious emotonal experiance
resurfing as internsified passion
intricate in its dipiction
dazzling in its dencely textured matrex
of intimacy in its silence; its fallen silence
the silence of a kiss
that kiss
his kiss
my first kiss with another boy

interrogated
or
questioned

I'm your free-love woman
and I'd be your free-love woman
if I didn't I waaaaaant yoooou
I love you with everything I got
every candle stick, plate, and mirror I've salvaged
and I'd be your martyr
if I didnt somewhere in the back of my mind
waaaaaant yoooou
y'see lover
I have alot of love to give
that I'm swallowed alive
by those unrepresented in our unprecedented love
The same thing that reprells me baby
brings my heart on stone table, to you
yoooou
yoooou
and I wish it were true
that my service
wasnt a diservice to our love
I wish my chaste love didnt corrupt the good things between us
but you give me the freedom
that makes me want to possess you, by any vague understanding of the word
you give me the respect
that makes me want to disrespect your wishes
you give me the understanding
that makes me ignore your meaning
You arent a veneer
and god I hope you arent just a moment
because I wont have no other choice but to use that moment to cry for all the years
without you to experiance my love, to animate my love, to understand my love
because you get a treasured vulnerable piece of me
that nobody, nobody will ever be wise enough to touch, if to see at all
and it bothers me that those after you
to receive my bits and pieces
because they arent like you. they aren't big enough for the whole thing
wont know who
made it possible
one man, that knew how to hold me at arm and shoulders length
because he knew I needed love, I needed to be touched, I needed my meaning to be felt, I needed to be fed, I needed to be understood, she needed her abstract ingenious to be solved
he wanted, he needed to be that man
and he wouldn't sabotage that with his insecurity or needs
in the way I sabotage our love
for mine

I look in the mirror and I see it in my eyes,

I start to feel it in my heart,

It's all things that can make a man cry,

It is distance that we part



I didnt think it would take much for you to realize,

To read between the lines,

To look deeper inside,

Take the time,

For us to confide



It's love I wish to share,

It's something fragile I need to give,

So please listen, take a chair,

My life...with you, I want to live



One second,one minute,one moment,

I want you to give me,

To show you what Im worth,

To get you to believe

Cupid has lended me a curse,

Of falling in love with the first I see



Im sickened by you, I need a love nurse,

I really think I do, I do

They say that some phenom makes your heart skip a beat,

And I know its because of you



The thought of love, passion, or desire,

I think of it as love's heart burn,

Because my heart finds you hot like fire,

For the love teacher, I have already learned



Now I want to quit wasting time and acually experiance it,

They say choose where your heart takes you,

So I try things a bit,

because your heart is known to seek truth,

And I followed my hearts footsteps

It lead me to where I met you...