i am trapped in a storm
a space in my mind that feels endless
i can only be saved from this void
by one thing
but that thing
that person
is hardly ever there when i need him most
so i try and save myself
but i can never escape
the only outcome
are more scars on my body

my heart is wheeping
because i dont ever want to see you
for fear that i might fall for you
your gentle words and gentle soul
are making my heart torn between you and him
i dont want to leave him
but seeing your face makes my heart fall into my stomach
and my knees buckle in longingness
i need him
i want you
i dont want to choose between the two
but i will never shake my loyalty
and i will never be labeled as a traitor
my heart is tired of this