I wish I could remember
I wish i could recall
But no matter how hard I try
There is nothing at all

I try to think back
And not look away
But I blocked out the past
And that's how my heart wants it to stay

If I let my gaurd down
And glimpse at the memories
I scare myself so well
They are are so horrid; When did life become hell?

I try to think of a time
When all I could so was smile
But it's been so long
I can't think of when I was that happy.

I remember all the bad
When all I want is the good
So I recreate a picture
Make my past a falsehood

I try and try
But I can only make my past a lie
Taking bits and pieces
And pasting them together

I'm scrap-booking my memories
In little bits
Trying to make the best of it
Make my life fit.

Once more I shut and lock my door
And again I reach for my purse
As before, I pull out my tissues and blade
Once again I pull up my sleeve
And remove the wristband you gave me
I look at myself in the mirror again ashamed
As I give into the tears and pain
And the sadness and anger swell
I begin to lose sense of my surroundings again
I press the blade to my flesh as I have done so many times before
And out of memory I repeat the action again, again
I wipe the blood away as I did the previous nights
The tears mix with blood again, and I wipe my eyes
Even though this has happened several times
I still am shocked once I come back down from flying high
With the repeated marks left
I quickly hide my blade again
And throw away all of the ****** tissues
I gently place the wristband back in place
And again smooth my sleeve over it
I remain hidden in my room again tonight
Awaiting more scabs to form
Again I cut
Again I fear myself
Again I'm afraid of the world
Again I cry
Again I scream
Again I hide
Again I am hurt
Again I try to block it all out.
Again I keep secrets
Again I cut
Again
Again
Again

when lifes got you down
and your standing all alone
look inside yourself
let your feelings show
remember who you are
dont forget to love yourself
cuz deep down you know
your all that you need

when your broken
into tiny little pieces
when your exposed
for the whole world to see
dont back down
hold your ground
prove to everyone
who never thought you could make it
that your stronger than they are

when the rains pouring down
and all you want is some sun
push away the clouds
make your own day bright
doesnt matter who you are
we all have the choice
to dance in the rain
or sit and wait
for the storm to pass

when your broken
into tiny little pieces
when your exposed
for the whole world to see
dont back down
hold your ground
prove to everyone
who never thought you could make it
that your stronger than they are

when your broken
into tiny little pieces
when your exposed
for the whole world to see
dont back down
hold your ground
prove to everyone
who never thought you could make it
that your stronger than they are

you say we arent a family
i figured that out long ago
as these marks fade
i no longer doubt, i know

bleed these colors open wide
tell me what you've found
as you open your blind eyes
and look at everything around

a broken family
with broken hearts
four lost souls
ready to make a new start

lost time
fades away
children ready to leave,
not wanting to stay


memories vanish....
like a magician's trick
we no longer panic
but expect the ongoings to make our stomachs sick

you say we arent a family
i figured that out long ago
as these marks fade
i no longer doubt, i know

if i could,
id change every word
i ever said

if i could
id take away all of
the bad things that happened

if i could
id erase your memory
so youd forget about me

if i could
id go away
so youd never have to see my face

if i could
make everything the way it should be
i promise i would

once again i find myself
falling behind in this plan i have
i notice the wrong paths being taken
with each step i take

i have come to see
that no matter how hard i try
i cant seem to make
my own destiny what i want it to be

with each new challenge i receive
i have to come to terms with
the consequences that i must face
though i know that i wont like them

but now i must place these problems
in His hands
i will ask Him to help me through
and give me the strength i need

i will ask Him
to take care of my destiny
and guide me down
the path he wants me to take

i now know and trust
He will take me in,
love me endlessly,
and teach me to live His way

The distance you placed between us
Is only going to backfire.
You tightened the noose;
I cut your wire.




You get in our way,
Inside and out we burn like Hell.
You've tried to break us down,
But we never fell.

Though you try and try
Your plans have failed.
And through it all,
Our love has not paled.

The distance you're placing between us
Is only going to backfire.
You placed the noose;
I have your wire.

You didn't start as a threat,
But as we saw your plans take flight
We prepared ourselves.
And we're ready to withstand the fight.

We want you to realize
And we want you to understand
That we won't let our love
Slip through our fingers like sand.

The distance you placed between us
Is only going to backfire
You're tightening the noose;
I'm cutting your wire.




And the distance you placed between us
Is already starting to backfire
You tightened the noose;
I cut your wire.