Because with you,
it feels like
a cup of coffee
on a snowfall morning.

Makes my heart race
warms me up inside
and each drop
stains the inside
of the very inside of me.

And most of all
its taste
and smell
lingers
and reminds me of home.

Dear Anne,

I don't really know if you have read, been reading or will read through my letters. I have been pouring my heart out through these words, well, even through countless stories I share yet I don't really get much from you back. I am not angry, sad maybe? Because yes, I am dying to hear how your day went, may it be good or bad... From simple things as what you had for lunch or what you wore that day (I love imagining how you look like from here - how those curly locks fall on your shoulders, or if you're wearing white because they look good on you).

I will just be here. I'll try something that may or may not work (but yeah, you're always worth the risk) and hopefully this silence from me can help you with the time and space you asked of me.

I will just be here, patiently waiting for a 'hey' from you, or even maybe a 'how are you?'. I will just be here, praying for you to have good days every day, that you don't have to work too late or too much because it drives me worried, and for you to have good night sleeps because I know how you love your bed.

I will just be here, with high hopes that in this silence, you look for my smile... Or how I try (sometimes in futile attempts of using cats) to make you smile when you had a bad day... And how I braved singing just to let you know that I have been thinking about you, all the time.

I will just be here.

Always yours,

Mims

Dear Anne,

For the last days, the stars have been witness to how my nights became a pouring of my heart and soul into words. I have been kept up all night by the yearning of putting into words all that I am feeling now - a mix of hope, fears, dreams and above all, love. The stars have fallen one by one, sacrificing their light just to grant my wish, one wish I whisper over and over again as each star falls.

You are the only star I am now waiting to fall; to fall for me and I, with a prepared heart to capture that star all over again. I will burn, yes. But together, we will shine.

You are always loved, Anne. :)

Mims

I've seen us at our best.
We've been through what I know is our worst.

We've seen the best of each other,
and got hurt by the worst of each of us.

Yet after this all,
I am still in love. :)
Even more than ever.

And I know that from hereon,
there have been lessons learned
which we can use
to deepen our connection more.

It's beautiful, waking up everyday with this realization.

You are always loved, Anne.

Always here,
Your Mims

It's cold outside -
the world has started to freeze
as you wake up in the morning,
with frosted sunrises
and bold, leafless trees.

And it's cold inside -
until the inside
of each and every of my inside,
ever since you told me
we should go on our own ways (for now, I know this will just be for now).

And it brings me shivers
(that type I could not seem to control);
those chills that shake me inside out,
to realize
that it is only you
that can bring back the warmth.

*You are always wanted, you are always yearned for, you are always loved Annette. :)

Dear Anne,

Here I am again; found myself crying at 12noon because of my heart's whispers. It isn't whispering now, though. It is screaming, it's crying out for help. Yet it seems like it is not heard.

And yes, this heart is stubborn. This heart will endure. And this heart is scheming another leap, forgetting everything else, at least for now, for you.

I am almost there, Anne. Please... Wait for me. :(

You are always loved.

Yours only,
Mims

Dear Anne,

Please always remember that this heart of mine knows no distance. It will keep on loving you, while holding on to vivid images of how your curls fall down your beautiful shoulders, or how you smile sheepishly and makes me wanna kiss you when you do.

It will wait for the right chances, for the right time.

And I will keep on dreaming about you every night and waking up with my heart beating so much faster, and with a smile on my face (though sometimes, they come with tears).

You are always loved.

Always,

Your mims.

Dear Anne,

I'm not sure if you know, or if I've told you well enough, but every time I hear about how your day went, or how you felt today... Or even just what you had for lunch or that traffic that ****** you off - it makes my heart soar. Even if I find out things that somehow bring a slight pinch of pain in my heart (just because I know I was the one doing those things for you, or should be the one doing those for you), I know I still love hearing it and it's all worth it. I walk around mindlessly downtown or at work with a big smile on my face, and everyone just notices that I emanate pure happiness. :)

Yup, that's how much you do to me. :)

You are always loved, always thought of... Always dreamed about, Anne.

Yours, and only yours always,

Mims

I just want to let you know
that every waking morning
I greet the world
with my heart beat
with every inhale and exhale
I find more and more reasons
to fall in love with you
deeper than yesterdays.

:)

Falling in love with you more and more each day, Anne. :) And this heart can go on until forever.

Yours, always... and only yours
Mims

The most beautiful feeling
is being the last person
to see you before you sleep,
the first as you wake up
and even the only one to witness
the in between.

And soon,
with high hopes,
it will be more beautiful.
For I will be able
to sleep
and wake up
where you are...
And hold your hand
in the in between. :)

Just a few more, Anne. I am coming home for you.

Yours and only yours,
Mims

Beep beep beep* The alarm rings at 6:30am.

But I have been up since 5.

There are two types of tears.

One - salty, that rolls down your cheeks.
Another - crimson, that trickles on your skin.

One says you felt too much, the other yearns to feel more.

Clench.
You hold my heart in your hands.
It beats as it feels you,
it beats every beat only for you.

Grip.
I hold on to every remaining string
with no fear
of how bad
or deep I may fall
if these strings break.

Tight.
I am not letting go.
I will hold on, I will endure.
I will fight for the best thing I have ever had.
For my greatest love.
And prove
that we're worth it...
even if it takes a lifetime.

Hope.
For I know that we can and will get through this.
We will triumph.
We will come out stronger.
And live our happily ever after.

:)

Sometimes
you just do
the irrational,
unthinkable,
unfathomable -
to take a risk
and find yourself
on your way back to home.

You step out of the comfort zone
and leap with both feet
to see
if you were really
made to fly.

I am flying home for you, Anne. Just a few more.

Yours and only yours,
Mims

When you know
You messed up
The most beautiful thing you've had
And your tears
Rush down your cheeks
With knowledge
That
Out there,
There may be others
That would steal away
The happiness
You only know.

But I am not letting you go.

This heart
Will fight
For the girl
That turned her life around.
The girl who
Made her realize
she has all the potential
To be better,
For herself and for you.

My heart silently whispers
-with hope and courage -
that someday, we will be able to say:


"It has been a tough chapter
of our lives,
but we made it through."


We will make it through, Anne.

Yours and always yours,
Mims

Some say
they feel sparks when they see the love of their lives pass by.

I say
It's a full display of fireworks in me -
An array of all colors and hues
and shapes and sizes
All in full
High definition -
as you walk my way.

And yes, it felt exactly that way the first night we kissed,
And it still feels that way until now.
**Or even so much more

Can you tell that
I have not slept very well
since the last time
I heard your voice?

I have been tossing around my bed
With so much
envy that others can just see you
and be with you
any time they wish.

I ask myself
Who you may have talked with
or been with
the whole day?
Or who the last person
were you able to see
before your day ends?

Because from 5000 miles away
I admit,
That from where you are
You have the power
to make
or break my day
with just a hello.
And that you
are the last thing on my mind
before I slumber,
the first thought
as I rise;
and even in my dreams -
It's you-
between asleep and awake.

*ps. Can you tell, with the rate of words spilling out of my heart unendingly for the past days, that I have been thinking about you so much?

Because this heart
will do its best
all its best
to show you it has changed
to be better
for you.

And only you.

I will walk until the other side of the world
just to find that girl-
my girl-
who has the right
to own a star
in my night sky.
(and I tell you, she does have a star named after her ;) )



:)