Lotus: Poems

620 · Mar 2015

Lotus Mar 2015

You heard of that drug?
That drug they call Love.
Na it ain't a pill or liquid on paper.
Na it ain't a shroom or leaf.
Na na na.
It ain't something you consume.
It consumes you.
No one knows how it happens,
All that anyone can agree on is
You ain't got control of it.
It just happens.

~~~~~~

Ya.
You know what drug I'm talking about.
Well man...
I'm pretty sure its consumed me.

608 · Feb 2012

Who am I?

Lotus Feb 2012

Who am I?

I am a rock of the river,
One that has become smooth and solid,
From the cold, chill water caressing my body,
From the gentle wind,
Breathing warmth against my cold skin.

I am a leaf,
Falling through the summer air,
Departing from my strong mother maple,
The falling stops and I feel, for the first time,
The Earth’s damp soil surrounding my green and red body.

I am the gentle rain,
I am the million quiet ripples covering the ocean’s surface,
Each one of me reaching out to touch fingers,
And explode into a wave of solitude.

I am the sunset’s orange and yellow beams,
Saying farewell to the sleepy life far below,
And covering the sky with my yin half,
Shut the eyes with my yang.

584 · Jan 2017

Twin Beauties Beheld

Lotus Jan 2017

Twin Beauties Beheld

I love it when I see them.
Those two lady beauties, those twin faces.
Their skin is like the snowy Sierra mountains in winter,
A Bianca so pale and that catches all the light shining around them.
Those twin smiles radiate two mysteries of the same coin.
One a mystery so solemn and careful, you could never sneak up on it.
The other a playful mystery, that with a rascal excitement
Is ready to drag you with it to find the answer.
They are beautiful!
The most unique beauty I have yet beheld.
Their presence is like a storm in the far distant sky,
The air is warm prior the approach of something powerful.
Their singing voices echo through the air and like a siren’s song
Brings you in so you will listen closer.
Don’t stop singing. Don’t stop.
I am like a smiling child when I see them,
Those two twin beauties.

574 · Dec 2013

Catching Something

Lotus Dec 2013

Catching Something

We are all strangers to the thing of love.
Just as we will always be strangers to the thing that makes life.
Let us close our eyes, hold out our cupped hands under the rain,
And see what we catch.

562 · Mar 2012

Untitled

Lotus Mar 2012

Untitled

His name is netcar against my tongue,
It is a warm...breeze through my teeth,
And the sound,
Oh the sound!
Once escaping my lips,
Upon meeting the air,
Resembles the delicate ruffling of wind through the leaves of a willow.

His face is a mysterious...
Beautiful!
Mirror of the sun's golden rays,
The moon's silver shivers,
Blended into one whole...
Forming a creation of the Earth...
Uncomparable.
Unique.
One out of the millions of galaxies
And all their individual stars.

His eyes are twinkling stars,
Two alined lovers in the sky.

His smile is the unraveling of a full moon,
Lighting where ever darkness lurks.

His energy is
light,
warm,
happy,
and full of love.

539 · Oct 2013

The Love of My Heart

Lotus Oct 2013

The Love of My Heart

I lay my head in your lap.
You stroked my hair with a gentle hand,
And searched my face with your eyes
And lightened my heart with a smile.
That was the most perfect moment
In a long while.
My heart is yours,
I love you,
My heart is yours.
I wanted to say these things,
But I didn't.
The silence was what held that moment together.
My heart is yours
And I do love you.
You know this already.

522 · May 2013

Reality

Lotus May 2013

Reality

Living reality is difficult,
Fantasies are what keep you smiling.
In the chamber of my mind,
Forever seems absolutely possible.
But what is this holding onto forever?
Even though each moment with you I spend as if it’s the last,
And think of no other space or time,
Later on I say ‘I want to be with you forever.’
These words will only bring the end closer.
Not closer in a sense that the end will come faster,
Though this can also be true,
But when it does come it is the biggest blow to the heart
I have known.
The hypocrite part of me is showing now,
For even as I write this truth of love,
I can’t let go of you…

444 · Dec 2012

Life’s Three Distant Strands in the Form of an Old Man

Lotus Dec 2012

Life’s Three Distant Strands in the Form of an Old Man

An old man sits
On the curving trunk
Of an oak
His suede boots
Covered in thick dust
From his travels on
Unending roads
Through country hills and city streets
His gray cloak that at the beginning
Of his travels was
Dry and perfect
Now is discolored from the many rains
It had soaked through
And has ragged tears
Where there once were none
The once brown beard
That had been smooth and close-trimmed
Is now long
Weathered
And the color of ivory bone
Under the moonlight

Here sits the young boy
That climbed up the very
Tops of trees
Here sits the young man
That traveled where none dare go
And found riches that none shall know
Here sits an old man
Weary and empty of the burdens of youth
Here sits the three distant strands of one life
Here those three sit
In the form of an old man
Weary and empty of the burdens of youth
He, with his weathered cloak and suede boots
And a pipe in his mouth
Gazes out over the dusty roads of his travels

419 · Nov 2016

Rainy Monday

Lotus Nov 2016

Rainy Monday

Three hours I’ve got
Till I need to place three more quarters in the slot,
Preventing a ticket from making a print on my windshield.
Walk fast, speedy gal.
The rain is making a damp home of your hair.
Pit pat pit pat pit pit patter.
The flats that hug my feet make tiny foot prints of sound on the city side walk.
The invisible prints, with the splash and swoosh of water waves from passing cars
Makes all other sound miniscule to my ears.
I push the swinging door open
And step from chill winter air into warm chit chat filled space.
The smell of damp clothes and freshly ground espresso fills my nostrils.
My eyes welcome the sight of relaxed people and the rustic interior of the bakery, brewery, and restaurant.
Time to get cozy on my favorite bench, with a cappuccino in my hands, a book in front of me on the table, and my bubble of comfort around me.

396 · Dec 2014

Constant Hollow

Lotus Dec 2014

Constant Hollow

Everyday I walk the sidewalks of downtown,
and everyday I hide my true feelings.
For every face I pass, I wear a mask.
This task of hiding is one I set for myself instinctively.
Each day rolls by with hiding and
A continuous hollow in me.
That hollow, for the most part, remains at a steady size,
But its when I see his face that the hollow expands.

A friendly smile takes shape on his mouth, so effortlessly.
He says my name as a person would say 'hello'.
His face doesn't show any identifiable emotion.
Its as if I am nothing more than an acquaintance he just met yesterday...

I want to stare, just stare into that beautiful plastered face of his for hours
And search for any shred of remembrance.
Remembrance that he said he cared about me.

Can't he see that the timing of his decisions involving me,
Is absolutely, painfully wrong?
Can't he at least be a friend to me in this time when I need friends?
Can't he just... care about me? Like he said he did...

375 · Feb 2016

Answers That Need Questions, Questions That Need Understanding

Lotus Feb 2016

Answers That Need Questions, Questions That Need Understanding

Am I here?
Do I exist?
Do you see me?
Do I see myself?
Is my heart and image collateral left behind until I return?
Can you tell me?
Can I tell myself?
Who is first to really know?
Who is last?

316 · Aug 2018

A Toss of Time

Lotus Aug 2018

A Toss of Time

She sat at a table
And across from her was a
Cluster of stardust.
Its beaming fingers
Perform a coin roll dance
That seems to last a lifetime.
In a sudden motion the coin
Is tossed into the air
And with a graceful echo
Lands on the tables surface.

We all are coins.
We all are symbols of
Beautiful wealth, intelligence,
And abundance.
We all perform our coin dance.
We all have our final
Toss of time.
And we all leave behind
A unique and special echo.

Written in loving memory of a beautiful and amazing friend of mine. Her cluster is dancing between the stars.

225 · Jan 2019

Aquaintance Under the Sun

Lotus Jan 2019

Aquaintance Under the Sun

You're like a boy shy of the sun,
Yet so desperately wanting to
Fall on your knees in the dirt and
Acquaint your hands with succulents and
Beautiful flowers.

You're like a boy that blames his skin,
Your perfect porcelain skin,
For the hiss and scorch the
Rays from up above execute on your body.

Your eyes spoke the truth at times
When your lips wouldn't budge.
I hoped I read those glistening
Windows of your soul correctly.
I was a flower you beheld on one
Of your dangerous walks in the sun.
I wonder are you happy we were acquainted?

The way you handled me most times
Was evident proof you cared for me.
You cleaned my leafy limbs of sitting dust,
You kept away the bugs that would nibble at me,
You watered me when I was parched.

Then came time to transplant.
The muscles of your hands grew tense,
You squeezed my slender stem almost to
A point of snapping.
Your rough and tough handle of my roots
Left them broken and weak.

You're like a boy that in a panic to run
Away from the burning sun,
Lost sight of his flower and the garden they said they'd grow together,
You're skin is burning I know,
But dont keep pushing me in the ground.
I wont always come back.
My leafy limbs wont regain their color.
My stem will sag and not regain strength.
My thirst will leave me speechless.

Maybe that garden we said we'd try to grow,
Isn't meant to be.
Maybe you aren't meant to be a gardener out in the harsh sun.
Maybe I am not meant to be acquainted with your hands.

All the same,
Don't continue to shut me out
In your frenzied panics.
Don't push me away so aggressively.
One day my roots will not revive
And I will not come back.

— The End —