Sometimes I have a yearning to see your face
Hear your voice and feel your embrace
The sun goes down and you are not here
Another night I spend without you near.

I imagine you walking through my door
Without an invitation, you also wanting more
But it is a dream I've had many times before
Something you have to feel inside your very core.

You are never coming without a plan ahead
Impromptu calling is not something in your head
You are resilient, so much stronger that I  
For I am folding without you here, and want to cry.

I often shed a tear for my circumstances
As you age, there are fewer chances
I learned that solitude has served me well
I have grown accustomed to my lonely hell.

I have learned to live and cope over the years
No longer dwell on my stupid lonely fears
I am destined to live alone and know this is my life
I am slowly learning how not to be a wife.

Soon I will recover and be independently single
Never wanting company, I will confidently mingle
Go home to my own bed and rest my head
And know that it is only by my own hand that I am led.

In analysing Time, I decided to escape,
fed up with ageing, so a pause I want to make
so I bought a book called, 'The Power of Now'
staying in the present, it would show me how.

Connect with my inner-self to stay inside my being
not thinking of the future, concentrate on what I'm seeing,
simple tasks to stay focused in the moment
the more I read, the more I liked involvement.

I learned to step out of time dimension
that the future is just a human invention,
no salvation in the past
only the present is built to last.

The mind is an obstacle as thoughts get in the way
not thinking about time, could start to waste my day.
the more I read the words, the longer I dwelled
and realised that Time indeed, could be held.

'Now' is all important, smelling and breathing
taking time to observe and connect with my being
living in the present, not thinking of the future
blanking out the past, not remembering a picture.

I am now brainwashed, cleansed and reborn
my problems are illusions and never even form
free from constraints of the ticking clock
my mind and body are free to run a mock. . .

When those too quick to judge and to deride,
Critics, who like the wind blow hot and cold
Extravagantly praise, bolstering pride,
Turn to abuse to stop you in your stride.
They are but loose leaves rattling in the wind,
Never settle or grow foundation seed.
Thrive on the swell and relish the rescind,
******* at life like leaches as they feed.
Never court or please those who praise or curse,
Ignore your critics as they soon disburse.

Time In Rhyme

Time. . . our life line,
Immeasurable joy,
Meticulously defined,
Everlasting as a boy.

Imposing and enigmatic,
Never ending tock.

Regulating tick.
Years begin to clock.
Hands of time crushing,
Memories into screams.
Ensure you use your time. . .
. . .to live out all your dreams.

My book is now available on Amazon!  
Dolly's Poems, "Time In Rhyme"

What I loved about you I've forgotten over time
That original loving spark will not come back to mind
The good times have gone, left me completely stunned
My heart's an empty bank, no love left in the fund

Your refusal to be there for me when I need it most
Has been the cause, of my all consuming ghost
Haunting me with thoughts of ending our romance
I doubt I can give our love a second chance

Too much muddy water has passed under our bridge
Tacky under foot setting hard like stale porridge
Sealing my emotions into one steady course
Leaving is the answer, and I'm filled with remorse

Grief devours my soul at the thought of losing you
My nightmares, are the arguments that always continue
The rocky path is strewn with disintegrated holes
Hard to walk upon the ground and need a firmer hold

So I carry on regardless and let indiscretions slip
Keep a low profile and dodge oncoming dips
Wondering what on earth is keeping this alive
You have become a habit which I keep at my side

You are my tormenter, my conscience and my muse
Seeing inside my head, and know I can't refuse
My future is unclear, but you see me coming back
Without you in my life, it's confidence I lack

Piercing through fluffy cloud
a warm volcanic rock
quietly sleeping in it's shroud
a mordant hidden clock

Dormant and alone it sleeps
inhabitants believe it's vow
promising not to leak
his secret lava pow

Like a lover who's been forsaken
patiently holds his burn
his heart remains unbroken
knowing I will return

From my silvery bird I see him
beckoning from the skies
the message is very clear
forgiving all goodbyes

His magnificence astounds
never failing to avail
like royalty it crowns
on a grandiose scale

Landing I know I'm home
reunited with mount Teide
never leaving me alone
it's malevolence always finds me

Torn in two by floating shadows
remembrance of your presence
hemmed in by haunting fellows
I smell a lingering essence

The air still offers promise
the ambiance of your soul
a foggy stirring grimace
leaving an empty hole

You may return to me
in dreams and knock my door
be real and let me see
no shadows anymore

But I hear no footsteps
only the silence of my mind
my heart penetrating depths
now lost and hard to find

Days descending into night
in dark drenching ways
bring me a torching light
as my shiny path decays

The shadows on my walls
dancing memories of the past
If only time would stall
relieve this numbing sap

Shrinking brink of life
as grief dizzily permeates
into a hell no one can know
a ******* soulless state

Consuming breath it shadows
mortifying in it's course
destroying as it furrows
suppressing all good thoughts



A dark poem reflecting on how I used to feel.  You never get over losing a loved one, but you learn to live with it......