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Alicia Nicole Nov 2011
Him
I’m sure we’ve met before,
because you look oddly familiar.
You have this way of talking, walking.
And that laugh!
Oh the laugh got me.
I heard myself repeating it just the other day.
I tried to cover it up, deny it, suppress it.
But why?
You’re a nice person, if you try.
You’re just a ****** up kid “looking for peace of mind.”
Looking in big white bottles, so big
You can’t see the bottom they’re so deep.
Just shake them up, get out a few, pop them in, and voila!
Peace of mind!
Well, at least you can get through today…

But what about tomorrow?
When we meet?
Will you even recognize me?
Will I remember you?
Or that laugh? Or those drawings?
They’re oddly familiar, that and then the solemn look.
I don’t know who he is, that pale young man.
But I guess we all meet in the end sometime.
Those sooner than others.
And now it appears death has come in the shape of you,
but I will keep you alive, kid.
I enjoy your smiles and laughs.
I will help you climb out of those bottomless pits they give you,
And back up for air,
for life.
Alicia Nicole Nov 2011
Who Am I?
A self-hating narcissist. A phony, a fake.
A lover who fights,
A an economist who reads and writes.

Who Am I?
I am the absolute value of all the positives and negatives adding together to an exact , specific, rounded to three decimal spaces point.
(Make sure you reduce all fractions.)
I am a racist revolutionary pacifist,
A sexist race-class-gender rights activist.
I am a bleached out blend of all the colors
that splatter onto pages, spreading around other people’s thoughts,
theories and theorems.
I am an organized mess, a planned out catastrophe waiting to unexpectedly happen one day or night at exactly 10:30pm, though in reality it’ll probably be more like 11:15.
I am the dates and times on a calendar from the wrong year, cut short but too long and exact,
too detailed for my or anyone else’s own good.
Too analytical, inquisitive, and apathetic.
Too bored, busy, moving and stagnant to be concerned with things like letters or stamps.
I am too many miles away for tears, the head will never make it to the heart.
And vise versa.

Who Am I?
I am the good girl I was meant to be, the female with the hair and the eye-lashes and the dresses and the make-up.
I am made-up.
I am a sheltered socialized conditioned natured-nurtured heterosexually-scaled heterosexist,
continually sexed and sexualizing and sexually exploiting my own ****** empowerment
at the price of our emotional liberation, properly appropriated of course.
I am a starved adult, a hungry child.
A learner who sometimes teaches.
A health-crazed American disaster straight from the fast-food factory line, extra large drink for an extra large waist-band and an extra-large expense account and an extra-large house and an extra-large scoop of emptiness.
I am a master of a few words and phrases I read in a book once.
Of a few ideas I read out of the yellow boxes on pages 510 and 526.

Who Am I?
What words thoughts actions books songs smells images define me?
Who defines me?
What boundaries confine me?

Or, more precisely, what am I?
I am the perfect collision of atoms and molecules into one blessed soul.
I am the singer/song-writer reading the books written in a language I wish I could speak.
I am the perfect puzzle piece to my own puzzle,
My own incompatible, annoying, over-analyzing jealous puzzle piece,
all jagged and torn.
I am my own best friend.
I am so sure of myself I may or may not have intentionally completely forgot what I was just talking about.
Did I just summarize the life-story the life work the life plans of myself or someone else?
What hypocritical overly critical actions did I commit today?

Who Am I?
I am you.

— The End —