When I was hurting,
You held me
And in so many scary ways
I was letting you in.
I told you things,
That instantly brought me to tears
And while the tears fell
You just held me,
And that said
So much more than
I love you
If I ever could….!

I killed my own happiness in such a young age,
By loving someone more than myself.......!!💔💔

I think stars have heard more secrets
Than any pair of human ears,
They’re trusted with our troubles
And are the guards of all of fears.
Perhaps we share with them our sorrows
For they too have known the night,
Yet they’ve learnt to let the darkness
Simply emphasise their light…!

Today I feel small—looked down on and disregarded. My thoughts are of little importance. My words have no bearing on the weight of the world. I’m tired of being taken for granted. If only I could get a fraction of what I give. But my efforts go unrecognised, and my soul keeps wishing to be noticed, to be valued; to be understood….!

Yes you; you who's reading this
Listen to me,
"People and pain are temporary,
You are walking MASTERPIECE..,
So, be happy and Love yourself.....! 🤗❤️

I tell you to be strong
while most days
I feel like I’m one push away
from crumbling?
I’ve been holding my breath
waiting for an impact
Please excuse my silence
It’s hard enough trying to hold it together
without having to also carry your pain….!

There was a time I told you,
            of all that ached inside;
            the things I held so sacred,
            to all the world I’d hide.

But they became your weapon,
             and slowly I’ve learnt,
             and the less that is said the better,
             the lesser I’ll be hurt.

Of all you’ve used against me,
             the worse has been my words.

There are things I’ll never tell you,
            and it is sad to think it so;
            the more you come to know me-
            the lesser you will know.

I was falling. I was falling in love. I was falling so hard that I couldnt tell when the fall would end, because I was falling for the one person who could break my heart with the most biggest amount of pain I could think of. I was falling in love with my bestfriend, the only friend I had in my life, the only person who understood me, the only person who never judged me, the only person who never shouted at me and the only person who accepted me for me. I had started to feel for him, but more then what I was feeling for him lurked the fear of losing him, because it wouldnt be just the heart I will lose to him, I will lose my whole self. He knows every little secret of mine, he knows who I am, he knows what I am, he knows everything and never judges, he's my secret diary, and those are things which are above love, because love can be found but these qualities are even rarer then love. I had the fear of losing him what if I propose and he didnt think that way, what if I proposed and he stops talking to me and never come back, what if he starts to hate me. All these questions stacked up and I curtailed myself from expressing my feeling for I didnt want to lose my bestfriend for love.
I had fallen in love with the only person who could break my whole existence.

I'm very ugly
So, don't try to convince me that
I'm a very beautiful person
Because at the end of the day,
I hate myself in every single way
I'm not going to lie to myself by saying
There's beauty inside of me that matters
So rest assured, I'll remind myself
That I'm a worthless, terrible person
And nothing you say will make me believe
That i still deserve love
Because no matter what,
I'm not good enough to be loved
And I'm in no position to believe that
Beauty doesn't exist within me
Because whenever I look in the mirror, I always think
Am I as ugly as people say?

(Now read bottom up)

I think about ending my life, daily
The fastest way way to go,
Without hurting others
My self-worth
Will i be missed?
These thoughts,
Shouldn’t be put on paper
But why not?
If more people talked about it,
Perhaps, they would not,
Act upon it
The greatest pain cannot be seen
It hides deep within
A broken bone is easy to mend
A broken mind doesn’t bind
All these thoughts of mine,
Often times i wonder
Have I lost my mind?
Am i only one,
With suicidal thoughts….?

Like a feather in the breeze.
You never really know I’m there,
Until I start to leave.
I don’t make my connection deep,
Because I’m afraid of what I’ll lose.
I don’t try to compete with anyone else,
And I’ll never make you choose.
I prefer to stick to the sidelines,
Because the spotlight hurts my eyes.
I hide behind a constant smile,
So you won’t know that it’s a disguise.
People tend to forget I’m there,
When I’m in a crowded room.
I can disappear for days on end,
And I’m bound to do it soon,
Don’t worry if you notice I’m home,
I never meant to stay.
But I know you won’t miss me long,
I’ll be forgotten in a day.....!

They didn't notice you were crying
They didn't notice you were sad
They didn't notice you were crying
They didn't notice you were alone
They didn't notice how attractive you were
They didn't notice how sweet you actually are
They didn't notice how you actually try to make other people smile
They did notice your failing grades
They did notice your unattractiveness
They did notice all of your flaws
They did notice all your mistakes
THEY DID NOTICE THAT YOU WEREN'T GOOD ENOUGH FOR THEM……!

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=YV7NA50Tlak

Tears are words that need to be written....!

Every body is fighting a battle you know nothing about,
So be kind
Always

I'm okay and things will continue to be okay even when it seems like they won't be. This sadness, anger, frustration, pain etc won't last forever..!
If you are reading this, then:
I hope you get the strength to get through whatever it is that's causing you so much trouble or pain at the moment.
Don't take things too seriously try to be happy and love yourself the way you are...!

Its one of my theories that when people give you advice, they are really just talking to themselves in the past......!

Today i feel....
Abandond
Ugly
Hurt
Like i dont matter
Useless
Invisible
Like i dont belong
Numb
Not worthy of love
Unappreciated
Hopeless

Wait i feel like this everyday💔

Crying isn’t my hobby, it’s the last gift of my love......!!🥺💔💔

Happiness is hard
to come by.

People who are real with you
are hard to come by.

Love is hard to come by.
True friendship

is also
hard to come by.

So it messes no sense to me
why good people

get ****** over the hardest.
Why good people

have to go through it
in the worst of ways.

I don’t understand
why people hurt them the most.

Why people are so careless
with the ones who show them

soft, gentle love.
Why people are so senseless
to the ones who make them feel alive….!

I act like I don’t care. Like nothing can hurt me. I put up this big wall of toughness and pretend everything is fine. Like I don’t need somebody’s “affection” but in reality I think I’m just too scared. Scared of not being good enough. Or scared of getting hurt. Scared to let somebody in. Maybe even afraid. Afraid of the possibility of being loved by someone that I fear they’ll eventually let me down. Afraid that my heart will break into million pieces because I gave my all to someone who promised they wouldn’t hurt me. But that’s the thing. You will never know the outcome unless you take the chance. So embrace the risk worth being taken darling......!

I had literally reached a point where I find myself apologizing for my
" existence " and that's when I knew my self-worth had vanished. It had pilfered right out of me. My light had went out............and I forgot how it felt to shine....!

I wish I could explain ur eyes 😍and how  the sound of ur voice gives me butterflies🦋...
I wish u know the way I felt ,every time I looked at u 👀...
I wish u knew my heart would melt when I thought of me and u.....
I wish I could explain how ur smile makes my heart skip a beat and how every time I saw u,I feel so complete!❤️❤️


U r not just in my dreams, u r every where like a disease that has spread to every part of me and there is no cure...

"I wish I could explain how much I love u❤️❤️"

Na khush *** na udaas ***,
Baz khali *** aur khamosh ***.....!

I’m not who I’ve always been,
The world that lies outstretched before me,
Is not the only one I’ve seen,
I’ve travelled on the tails of comets,
I’ve burned up in the hearts of stars,
I’ve been spat out of supernovas,
That left me scattered near and far,
I have dined in distant galaxies,
And taught the birds to sing,
I’ve danced for a whole lifetime,
Upon Saturn’s dusty rings,
I’ve been there long enough,
To learn what makes the willow weep,
I’ve sung celestial lullabies,
That sent the moon to sleep,
I’ve been both the flowering water,
And the stone that blocks it’s way,
I’ve been frozen, I’ve been molten,
And I’ll be again someday,
Though I’ve been a billion things,
This is the first one that can smile,
I’m pieces of the universe,
Living as human for a while….!

When you wake up, just know
That you have a reason to live
Maybe you won’t know it yet
But you’ll soon.
You aren’t useless nor worthless
Treat yourself good
Apologise to yourself
You didn’t help yourself
When you needed it
You didn’t give enough time to yourself
So, give yourself some time
And love yourself like
You deserve to be loved.
Know your worth and enjoy life
Even if it’s not going as planned
Know that life is full of surprises….!
Be happy and
Love Yourself

So much of what we learn about love is taught by people who never really loved us……!

I’ll be ok for a few days but then it hits me, I stop functioning and everything falls apart again….!

And it seems that the more I’m searching,
The more I’m losing myself entirely….!

Are you okay?
Are you alright, are you fine, are you good?
Are you adequate, are you decent?
Are you emotionally stable, sleeping without crying, smiling because you want to?
Are you breathing without questioning, are you waking up without trying, are you eating without throwing up?
Are you reading this poem right now and thinking no?
Are you thinking for the first time, will I ever be okay?

You will be okay.
You will be alright, you will be fine, you will be good.
You will be adequate, you will be decent.
You will be emotionally stable, you will sleep without crying, and smile for the happiness blooming inside of you.
You will breathe without questioning, you will wake up to a new day, you will eat easily
You
are going to be okay.
So please smile sunshine
It’s a fine new day
To be okay :)

What if we feel alone because we are terrified of being intimate with another especially ourselves…?

I could feel my eyes start to sting with the need to cry.
Why did I have to be so freaking sensitive..??

You’re helping the healing of generations of pain, and this is why it hurts so much.
Don’t give up….!

You loved me like a flower
The ones you leave to die
Instead of loving me wild
You kept me locked inside
You let me slowly wilt
Until there was only a piece of who I was
And keeping something wild, locked
You should see what it does
If you meet a girl like me
I ask you to let her go
So you can see what happens
When you let a flower grow
And I didn’t get that choice
But I don’t blame it all on you
And I let you take me away
Because thought you were beautiful too
It is true that you broke me
But I still wish you well
And I hope I was beautiful
Before my petals fell…!

Closure is your choice.
Closure isn't an apology, or justice, or answers.
That's insecurity.
If the situation made you feel awful, seeking closure by reopening , it's insanity.
Closure isn't something they can give you.
Closure is moving on. Closure is your own choice.

Emotions just….falling, one by one becoming non existent all staring with joy and happiness. It won’t stop until I’m empty, nothing there…dead but still here. Disappointed in us. This. Whatever is this anymore? Round and round in circles, the same problem over and over. Time. If that is a problem, why? Why does everyone obsess over time? Screaming at the top of my lungs “help me I’m drowning, drowning in tonight’s thoughts just like yesterday’s” every night dying as I suffocate myself with a pillow just so I don’t worry anybody with my problems. Music is my best medicine and is the only friend I feel I have at the moment. Staring at at the ceiling as I listen to music through my earphones just trying to stay afloat. It’s starting to get gat harder and harder each night to do so~

I fell in love with all of you.


I didn’t just fall in love with the best of you, like
The way your eyes light up the moon
The way your laugh makes me smile
The way your hand fits in mine
The way your personality stands out
The way your smile gives me butterflies,
I fell in love with all of you!

I fell in love with your scars,
The way you make sarcastic remarks
The way you feel helpless at 2am
The way you cry about something from years ago
The way you sometimes get angry
The way you sometimes want to be left alone
I fell in love with all of you.
I fell in love with the great in you
And I feel in love with bad you see in yourself
And the bad you see is the great I see.
Because I love every part of you,
Every bit.
I fell in love with all of you…..!

Today is all about a person who is my life, who was there for me every single time.
They both are the only person who made me look forward to coming to college, made me live my life. Even when everyone left me, they never let go of me, they held me tight whenever I felt like letting go of life. This is to the two people who loved me more than anybody in the whole world, was concerned about me more than anyone in this world. They made my life worth-living and beautiful. To the two people who has always had my back, always. To the person who scolded me like a mother, adviced me like a father, teased me like a brother but on top of it all, they loved me more than all of the people in this whole world.
Thank you for being with me. I don't know what I did to deserve such pretty and pure souls like you, but I'm glad to have you in my life.
❤️"THANK U FOR EVERYTHING"❤️

I feel so lonely
My buddy's gone
Even my best friend is far far away
Every day is getting hard
Why did life had to be this hard?
Why did people always had to leave?
Why is it so hard to live now?
It's getting harder and harder every single day
And I don't think I can do it anymore
I have tried my absolute best and gave in my all and now
I don't have any hope nothing at all
I give up
Sorry to all the people whom I promised that I won't give up but it's way too hard now I can't bear it
I'M SORRY

Lemme give you an example...:
Jsut see tihs msg. Evrey splleing of tihs msg is wrnog. But sitll yuo raed it wihtout ayn mistake. If yuo want true raletionship.....Just ignoer mistaeks and understand them.....!

Isn’t the moon dark too,
most of the time?

And doesn’t the white page
seem unfinished

without the dark stain
of alphabets?

When God demanded light,
he didn’t banish darkness.

Instead he invented
ebony and crows

and that small mole
on your left cheekbone.

Or did you mean to ask
“Why are you sad so often?”

Ask the moon
Ask what is has witnessed.