a yellow beam:
the town erupts with a scream
a scream
a dream
my team
you, can I (you and I)
break me down into my particles
something's behind my back
something's ruptured inside
i've fallen apart

i don't want your condolences for nothing
how can i complain when i have virtually everything in
the world i could ask for
i just have to close my eyes and
...
crash

i've been struck by eternity,
and the idea that there's someone else in my body
this ****** into the inside
i feel our shadows collide

time to be the man with the plan
want my checklist, you want my
nothing, everything
i'm unable to do a lot
able to do something
except define me
control me
see
it's not that hard
play the card
win your earnings
drag it into your pockets, shove it;
shove it in there
feel uncomfortable
feel like me,
see
again
the never ending bittersweet
perfect circle
drawn by hand, by
the man
the accomplished
sorry, so sorry
sorry i'm not your idea of
a *******
man
but i must release this
i'm the man with the plan
i must go on

i've been struck by eternity
and the idea that there's someone else in my body
time to slide right out of this dream
unto reality, with a beam of light

i will be me
you too
i will hold you
until the night comes and day passes by
the dream that one day
we will come full circle
and that
i will understand that
everything is not a plan

you need to too
you need to too
you need to too
you need to too
you need to too

Why
ever                        know
your
bloodline(andloveandwhatnot)
underst­anding yet COPYING
out wonderful             (DREAMS)
collapsing to my knees with just your voice, i take what i take and take it in
                          [hey come out h(ere like wonderful marriage) i won't be normal]
                          time’s pieces eat
shattered love
girlsandboysmenandwomenloveandsexwhatdidyouaccomplishinyourf­uckinglife

away far away gone astray at the end of the
black
road
time strays on the ashtrays of solemn ground
brought all around on the old playground
and i take in what's mine
all the time
and i love to feel at home
as i'm
loving the high go fly by and by
as i say bye
to this dream
i love all the answers and ask all the questions
but i can never return

i will remember you, as i
take my final step
and
i will remember you
as i
know where to go
and i will remember you
take you to the other place
(far, far and away)

the past is the secular
wonderful clear decision
locked in the box of our
juxtaposition

i am full of doubt, and
my time is
running out

i will hit the floor
till i can't scream
anymore

oh, take me with you to the end
i don't want to be me anymore
if there's a thing of connection I'd want
to connect with you

it's only a matter, of unpredictable time
and i know, oh i know
this is how it ought to go
and i
will remember you
as i turn, and face the crowd
i follow you, and
in the end,
you're still my
sweetest
friend

unbound and incepted right into to the camera
looking in, if you're watching
can you see me staring at you

this is the final glare
my wannabe farewell
when you look at your camera in your mind,
can you see me staring at you
will I haunt you like you haunt me

i can feel you looking right through me

I am the one who wants
to
talk to
you
I am the one who wants to hold you
(all day and all night long)

I am the one
who
loves to
buy you
things,
imaginary
distorted rings
I am
the known
the blown
the unsought dreamer
oh, what
to do
I am the
one
who wants
to feel (inside
you)

I can't help
but be, a little bit honest
I can't
not,
be a
little bit
curious
why then
do
i know
what's right in the end
where is my
reward
my Lord, my journey
to the end
to the death
do us part?!

I'm unsatisfied with This
   i remember when it felt
more black and white, my life now
more vibrant in color--
it is not a good thing

easy as i came
under the naked sun
naked, everyone
i knew something before, but
the feeling's expanded
there's no clear answer to the questions
and i don't know how long i can go on
i can not repeat my past, the past i don't have
(stretched out of me)
why did you live me in this body

poetic leaves create memories of summer,
endless hours of happiness
exchanging words, living in our little worlds
god, what happened to Us?
my agony in our subtlety, do you feel it too?
perhaps we've both failed each other
i'm sorry,
forgive me
we'll come to see
somehow, and someway
that we will find out what true love is one day

an encircling desire to live a life in dreams
overshadows my lust to live amongst those in reality
blending the two with His hands on my shoulders running down my back
part of the bleeding attack,
i want to see my place in the world with my impression, unable to do so so now i recline
and go to a place where i wake up and feel and **** in the rain again
theonlythingiknowisthat
my inevitable fate will be my revelation

kick my body out to the right
spiraling in spiraling into
the void cut down and slicing like
a blade in the dark
a bark
that's forgotten in the depths of the night

a symphony of black holes screams out as blood shoots out
from the sun reminding me of when it all fell down

time likes me likes you
what do i do
take it all away from you
take it from me everything
i want you to take everything from me

spiral into my existence while
you destroy me.

Undecided frontages in the back of the garden
bleeding orchids look through you with
shots refired and rewound
through time slowly i see
i want to become what
reality has plunged
me into broken
clocks and Time
defeats me
crushing
me

picture a dead leaf crushed
on cracked sidewalks
beaten pouring rain
from a bleeding sky
the reason why
I want to understand you, understand heaven
if that's you

life on the edge of the beach
wet sand into the incoming waves
****** beneath (I'm coming through)
I want to know

The treason is the reason for the resurrection of the State
blind dictators are dancing in the dark
i've made my mark
your eyes burn my eyes burn to
turn away
under the residue
of tumbling relationships

if you're my piece of a puzzle that is my life
my understanding of choices
my beautiful headlight
my light at the end of the tunnel
my one
my everything
my god, my God
why have you forsaken me

as i sink under the nectar of oxygen
i want to understand why it is
you couldn't save me
you and I
i knew that you were the answer and you didn't just crack the heart
you ripped it out and tore it
stomped on and  beaten down all around the beaten ground
i would have disappeared right into your rushing hair
and i had the choice, you had the voice
of a goddess in the wind
and life in the wind
if this is the end
i'll hold it to you
you know
what to do
you know how to do it
you know what to see
you know
you know
you know
cut it away
live it hey
don't burn my eyes
under endless black holes
beaten cracked holes
why oh why
couldn't you say why i could why am i why why i know i know why i know how the dancing devils ripping shadows
of disease and decay
to be
to see
let me understand you
tell me all about you
four whole years
four old years
i''ve done it all

so if this is the message over the broken
sidewalk and other individual studies.
cheer for me and see
we have it all

so life
is life
and time is time
i will find the resurrection in my treason for you have yet to find yours in yours

(lift me up, let me ascend, and come with me)

and then there was the the idea of Then and Now

Do nothing? Do something? My mind and body is being pulled in different directions yet the only way I want to go is with you
it was harder to know the directions when you're not next to me
yet in the same room
the songs plays on

i knew that moment was cracking
some barrier broken, me looking into your face (yet not your eyes)
i felt the Two one in complete Eden and like a complete disgrace
killed and split right in two
yet i knew i wanted this i always wished for it
for years (implying you have)
my hand on your back
i moved it up and down
just to sink into the sound
oh god
how beautiful
how couldn't i tell you

but the rest of the day was
something exploding inside the night
as i felt a disconnect from earthly things
my fault, I'm sorry
my mind everywhere i walked on among the silence
and maximum volume of my thoughts
and do i love you or do i feel connected to you?

tempted by snakes and broken down by evil
living life in the veil
someone screaming in my ear:
can't you hear?
delusion or confusion (or love)
you've always been my here and i don't want to
go in the other direction no matter how satisfied i'll be
i don't want to scream about some ******* influx of dreams in the night so then drinking from the ocean i'll shoot up and bellow:
can't you see
you were supposed to save me

because perhaps i don't want to know but i don't know what i did considering that I've done something in the first place because i really haven't done anything ever

If you were the same me
I would have known how
everything goes now
she stares at the ceiling
li(v)es full of meaning
and somewhat deceiving
the way you look

sliding down
running town
looking 'round
meaning
life is short
when i caught
beakers down
bleeding

breaking beneath the waves
unknowing  as it is to you
i will send the ocean into
your cavi
ty

la la la la la la la lie
ala carte somehow,
why

is it
so hard
looking at
me
to see that you truly look past
me
seeing circles
pulling circles
running perfect little
circles
i can adorn you
with your crown of thorns
born of unborn
igno
rant
suffering

this will not end till I say it's over
like is the dreaming, not the doing
if i could erase the scratches of time
bleed them all out, and do it again
all for you
all for you
this is not what I want to do
if i knew
something to do
i'm caught right here in the middle with you
glancing envy
turning so pale
chasing your tail
this isn't the end
i have gone so far
this is not over
and
look at me all you like
i will not forget this
i will not forgive this
laying the fist down
changing it all around
i know what I want

yet i can't have it
you can't know it
she doesn't see it
he couldn't be it

i am the crown of your thorns
unturned by endless stones. I am the reaping, i am the creaking, floors in your youth. here is my shoulder, there is your hand, there is his hand, i can not end this with my shouting endless dreams. flowers on flowers, gardens on gardens, fields upon hills and mountains in silk. this is so fast. this is so cold. i can't be too old

or be too young

He looks like an eternal night, but I have seen the rising sun of glory ascend over the hills of grace. I have watched as it vanishes like a sigh in a gentle clap of a storm. My time is up. My body aches. I am not who I am.
I have travelled far to take revenge on myself. I drift through dreams and reality. I’m here to take what’s mine and mine alone. If I could I would I’d rip all the wallpaper down, strip the room, stare at nothingness. It will remind me of the empty fields I look upon now. You are the one I see. I am nature, you are fate, he is creeping up on me. I am coming for both of you.
I have allowed myself to shake my arms and let my knees collapse. He whispers to me. He controls me. I cannot shake him, but I do not surrender.
I know I know my place, your face, his eyes in the dark. I can feel him move like rapid flashing photographs. We’re all here.
I can be a holy trinity too, an uncontrollable time bomb.
My chair rocks back and forth as my body aches. I am needy. I am meek, but I will not be week. I will look at myself in the mirror until he appears on the other side and grabs my head and smashes it against the mirror. I could confess, but confess nothing.
Once upon a time I was told about the Two. The Two sides, to every story, to every man, woman, and child. The discoverable entity, synchronicity, iontegrity...
Give your love to me.
I sigh because I vanish, I pine away because I echo.
My place in life is controlled by something some kind of someone, someone inside of me, some kind of force, the Two, the one, the other, oh God...I can not crawl into myself to scratch him out.
My Two lives, my iontegrity, control me. I live in both reality, and dreams, but which one is which when they’re are always red eyes behind your back that pat your shoulder, sending you into that inevitable shake.
If I could I would I’d tear myself away, starting over tomorrow, with or without you. But he will always haunt me. I may not win this battle with myself. I am not afraid, somewhere deep inside me how wants me to win, and I can’t give him what he wants, or else he does win.
I can slam doors and smash my hands against run-down desks. Fate is fate. Lock me away to deal with my insanity, my iontegrity, the entity that holds me...my time is up.
What’s best is best. I can still feel him tearing away, black glue seeping out….some kind of joke...this has to be some kind of joke…
I only wish, but still as I descend into my broken memories he’s still there.

In the end you’re so different that you’re completely the same.

I will go one, with or without your love, or support. I hope you understand, I really do. You must believe me, your breath soothes my soul. No crucifixion can repent me from this. I will not be treated as the vessel that holds the universe. For I have seen the rising sun of grace...I will go on. If I could I would tell this to you out loud and dream of an upstream morning to visit and get to the top of those hills. I will not sigh.
And so the temple crumbles down.
How beautiful this is, so darkly beautiful to be controlled by a shadow. He’s everything. Yet I can feel myself sinking in, oh God, I must go on. You must believe me...your breath….your hair...the sunrise...whisper to me, I find it comforting to know you’re near me. I am not an ambiguity. I am not empty. If I could I would I’d give this all away…

I am not ambiguous, even if iontegrity tells me so. I will be who I am, and take revenge on myself. I will not let myself be beaten down by the powers of the godly waves. For I may walk amongst a shadow, but to cast a shadow, there must be some kind of light.

sometimes things taste much too real
drop the ball know just don't let me
steal
the body a
away like you did like before
flat down face pounded on the floor like before

i will not
i will do
i will see
and i will reduce
to the
war

raising the bar
and sick of the smoke
battered down and sent to choke

blue is the blue as read is the red
and if i were to leave here
i would be
dead
and if i could try
perhaps i won't sigh
any
more

and i will not cry
for i will not die
i'll take what's mine
i'll cross your line
i'll figure it out, this destiny
whatever fate is
don't bury me alive

black
holes
black
coal
what's the matter with

love
life
peace
little conflict
dreams
peace
time
sharing itself

back in the hole
stretched and un
even
i'll be there too, crossing your line
and i'll take what's mine
because I am here too
you are there

oh, lets
look again
can they see you from-

lost and found again
lost inside the sin
of what's inside sin's sin
if everything's wrong if every
things tried
and pined away
today
i'll go on

can they see you from the end of the-

road's on fire
the road's on fire from
the tree that holds the liar
with a finger on his lips
cut off finger tips
i'll take what's mine
cross your line
can they see you from the end of the street
inside the window
changing lust
backyard dust chokes me down to the end
this is a friend
alone on my own
can't you remember what you said

can they see you from the
inside
can they see you from the in
side
feel you touch breathe you from the inside
inside your line
taking what's mine
predetermined des
ti
ny

(you're wrong, you're wrong
so
long)
freezer ice
back to what's nice

time goes by

we are,
human
we
are,
hu
man

Look at me,
look back
go ahead
look at me again

"say that to my face"
circular something eyes
something red about the way your lips part
makes a little
sound

something anything really
to calm my nerves
slow me down
in the good way, of course,
hey
look at me seriously
this
is seriously serious

I'm not ******* around
not anymore
never again

it's not time to be the man
you've always been forced to expect
to dream about and desire
because i will be who i want to be
i am not some stereotype
i do not wear what you expect a man to wear
i am not a manly man with a camouflaged hat but a human being like you
in complete and utter love with you
but i just need
you to see and think and dream
outside the box

because a door broken through with a hammer is beautiful
            dreams shattered by what you know
words are only words until they're laid out like a puzzle
            meant for only the robbed to find

and if the sun doesn't give you inspiration for your insides
          i have no idea what will drown me out
flush me into reality of feelings and blood and other various wires
        give me your hand i want to become you

let me become you into your mind give me your mind
          (it's been awhile i guess a little too long)
but maybe that's my fault a little maybe just a little bit
           give me peace in my mind just a little

because thinking is not doing thinking is not doing
               (****** my mind)
because thinking is not doing i can not make this better
              (give me your mind)

my mind is dying my mind is dying thinking is not doing
            thinking is different not doing take action
against whatever may come my way there is no wall there is
            no wall i remember it so clearly now yes-

you sent the light up to the darkness of the midnight of the world and e
very
thing was very very peaceful until i was awoke and couldn't fall back asleep to
the so
und of your voice crackling but you were not there you
we
re never there
will
you ever be there when i need you i need you answer me

tumbling over and over again

words
be
tter
soft
   and not sorry
non apologetic
shivers

warm skin hot candles
back t
o
the
good
stuff(like you)
never,
really
ever

would if i could
would you
remember me
if you
could
would you
remember who
i
actually
wanted to
be

never,
really
tumbling towers
toppling over
copying
words  again

and all this to be meaningless
perhaps
i'm a dying art
(put your mind into it)
naturally curious
about me
and my
dying slipping art

nothing ever works

ripping the inevitable skin
unable to find the loss to win
what i crave most is gone away
what's lost has been found but again astray

whatever leaves me in my own desert here
could be lost by a bottle of water by the pier
of a somehow littleknown town
down and around the bend

mine
mine

let me know if this goes too slow
or if you want me to pick it up and go
faster and faster to break the speed of love
a thing not possible a thing not above

what's mine
what's mine

lie to me everything you say is the truth
sometimes honesty rises under and around the gravity oh see
whatever the tooth and whatever (me)
I'm lost in you I'm lost in me I'm lost we

are mine
are mine

unable to let go of the wheel
i control it all the appeal in me is gone however
to you i'm just another sigh in the dark
another walk in the park to know how beautiful and how sad i am that you

are not mine
are not mine

backed up into the home of (the house is bigger on
the inside)
family and grace
to find a wilting rose
and a more than a little morose
girl
crying on the bedroom floor
oblivious

pining away like a sigh in the dark
lighting a match to see the naked
(everything)

when you know
when you go

time was flying when I walked out of the room
under the red balloon
i understood it to a point where it was too much
to handle

and gradually i fell
down the downward spiral
(the house is bigger

i took a bite of the apple of life
your skin was burnt and i wanted to heal you
with my filthy touch

whether i want you to put your lips on mine or put your gun (under your bed) to my head, i don't know

both ways would end the suffering

but you were lying their with no veil on your face
and you will see my mask i put on every single day
i'm a a real disgrace
back in the corner where you glance I'm completely invisible and so far away

take me as i am and i'll calm down
                      on the inside)

i own my atonement through my atrophy

and it seemed the blood dripped from the walls like rain slipping down windows
in the storm
i've called the tempest
war is coming
( and i fell down the downward spiral)
and i'm still going

and through this and during what's going on the poet said:
what's yours?

and back in the room where you laughed with your friends when we
(I) burned with envy
in your beautiful happiness what i will would kinda coulda woulda got

and i wanted to place my hand on your face
blow the day away
but i'm completely invisible and so far away

and you don't see me

the poet says wanna see the day fly away like
a bunch of newspapers from the 1800's
the poet says i need to feel like i'm completely different
to feel like i'm exactly the same
the poet says forget the shame and play the game
burning with envy
the poet says everyone take sit all swimming in ****
he told me that everything's a ******* game
and it's all in my ******* head
and my ******* world within  a world
is decaying

you don't know how long i've waited
and for what
i'd get rid of every feeling
but then again
the only thing keeping the day interesting
is the feeling

(the poet says take it all away and decay to pine away like a sigh in the dark in the back of the classroom i would have know the beauty and the dreams of a bunch of condos and a pool mixed with the nectar of the gods and everyone was will may have been there and you too in the background but i'm in the background every other day completely invisible and so far away

you're magnificently beautiful,
inspiring,
but
I'm not saying
a word

I
love is all that can destroy hate
back and forth among turbulent waters
she doesn't see me like I see her
(but it's okay)
i can wait

i've only waited years and years
and every other little thing(this and that)
is gone and has vanished out of my sight

if i had one wish to do with these words
just a little more (just a little much more please)
if i had just one wish for i to gain the confidence
not in phone calls face-to-face
among this disgrace (violent voice shaking)

because every time I think of you i sweat
sitting in immense heat and panic attacks of power
nothing really ever matters (love is the only thing that can destroy hate)

but I know what you need is to calm down
and let me out of my box
because we are both going to sit
in anger and regret

and i know this is the last year
the last year anything can happen
I don't want to leave in a bend
but everything must have an end

just as before, just as before
the smile
don't tear me apart
please this is my heart

our heart
is not
anyone
else's
please
don't
leave me
at the end

II
the last thing i ever wanted was for an end to come into a beautiful supernova
but maybe I'll forget it all in a few years
meet someone else
someone else'll come in
(but that's why you need to tell me)

maybe you feel the same exact way
afraid because of restrictions
but dear, there's no such thing as private property
a sign placed to keep people out
he demands you to stay away
they demand you to leave

i will
never
ever
let this go

as long as you can
tell me

there's no such thing as private property when you look at it
no censoring no treason
just pure old good old real exactly real love

love no one understands
a love with no fights
a love not for the basic American dream
a love for those who want to write
a love for those who wish to dream
the real love that's been forgotten in time

and you can teach me
and I can teach you
in a peaceful garden
with little work
because everything's perfect
(when you're around)

III
there's about four steps into the wonder
to do so i must cross the line and you too
so we can meet in the middle
and lights in the sky will sing falsetto

and i will cross the line
to take what i know is mine
and you will cross
and take the toss
of Love

ev
er
yt
hi
ng
wi
ll
be
pe
rf
ec
ti
kn
ow
it

(cross the line to take what's mine and cross the border to take what's yours.)
There's no such thing as private property

IV
In Love
In Peace
In Understanding

In Hope
In Joy
In Heartbreak
In Tears

In Kids
In Choices

In Dreams
In Fears

In Hair
In Kisses

In ***
In Matrimony

In Nothing
In Voids
In Time
In Lines
In Who?
In What?

In Signs
In Mine
In Yours

In Property
In Towns
In Sleep
In Day
In Cities
In Decay

In Books
In Movies
In Lies
In Truth

In Houses
In Apartments
In Substance
In Death
In Life

In You
(yes)
In Me
(yes)
In Bliss
(yes)
In Nothing
(forever)
In Everything

the arms are slit and the legs are cracked
the mouth's ripped and the time is ripped
being along the line of the whacked
and all the others tipped and whipped

i long for a single moment of bliss
one where i don't have to expect will end
but my face is dripping and my eyes are a kiss
of complete ****** death and my legs bend

the pressure of my stomach reminds me of myself
decaying in a slow single way along the slide
of my childhood and right now i want to tell you you're well off
loved not ignored so don't complain to me if i'm by your side

i'm lucky enough to be unlucky to be me
this life's like a bleeding cheek
a kiss with a knife in my face, see?
here's where you are and you're meek

so along the shore lines of a couch
in someone else's beautiful house
enough to tell me where you are and take from your pouch
purse whatever you give me give me a douse
of orange
and purple

everyone's here reminding me
how there's faith and assurance inside of crosses
but whatever you want me to be
i will but that doesn't mean my life's not full of losses

so let me be or let me in with you
i long for your beautiful long red hair
so just give me a free time before the bloodshot's due
if you love me like i love you i think you may want to care

i                                                                                                                                                                           (s
                                                                                                                                                                            l
i
p)
                                      your      
                                                                     fin
                                                                    ge
                      rs                        
w
a
n
t
y
o
u                                                                                                                                                                                
t
o
s
l
o
w
l
y
                                ^
                               |
                                |


                          do
wn





                                                                                 my
                                     spine

red cold love(r)
trying to vanish into focus
little black spot on the scope can't see me

anywhere anytime anyplace
you can be my pretty little piece of grace
chopped off by the stars cutting the night sky
i can fall
i already have fallen

easy to look up when i continually fall
whether this choice is a good choice i just need to sit and wait
for the right time and the right place
to come into whatever this hole needs

yes a need
my hole is growing hollow
fill it up but you're connected in a dispute of fire
you're getting burned and i'm getting burned
i know it the way you're a little disconnected
not so with me not so i see it

do my eyes sparkle and are the see-through like a clean lake
can you see the bottom of me
because i don't think there is a bottom
i'll just keep falling,
and falling,
and falling
(no bottom)
and right as i hit that impossible sidewalk-

You can take me back up again like I know You will

sometimes on starry nights i flick
a blade and stab a star
just to feel the relief of nothing yet something
always everything

time flies bye bye birdie fly away
like Time did where have i gone
where did i go besides right here
sweating blood crying icicles
freezing fire burning ice

(hey that's nice)

back a forward up a track and send it back to the farm
back to tell you exactly where i was and where I am
time will tell you time is true
what I'm exactly something supposed to (do)

where i was now dum diddie do doo
remember the chants of lum dribbie so loo
so bang the drum or hit it softly
time is not supposed to melt slowly
a gradual process they say seven steps
like the seven rings of Hell
somethinglikethat

look
i get
it
it all
makes
sense

**** me to hell and i'll laugh
maybe i'll see you too (two)
to be or not to be
Hamlet
yes
Hamlet
you
don't get
it

do you
you need to tell me stop burning the tree
of life
like you keep
building a wall
and i can retreat from the wall and go
somewhere
else
but
really you just need to smack me in the face
and put your wet lips on mine as you push me down
(welcome to Town)
don't back down
this
is your moment
how'mi
gonna tell you
when you don't let me see you
barely respond
I'm
the only one

I'm the only one I'm the only one i'm the only one i'm always going to be look at all i gave you go to sleep go to sleep rest your eyes rest your pretty blue (green?) eyes as you look to the sky and smile tell me about the stars i murdered one once how nice how suffice nt it is it is so nice isn't it so fine you're so fine kiss me kiss me i'm drowning in here the real world
hell

only
this is an
allusion

so **** it all the ******* phone like always **** the ******* ****
complete and utter nonsense
[complete
and
completion
of beauty]

love me

tangle up as One inside the darkness of the mind
break bad the love of mind and put it back together  (******* swine)

i think to know that this is this
and all everything else is a Wish
inside the holy temple of our Mind

since this is Us and let me be someone to be someone we are Someone
i knew the danger before it even worked, and let me be...alone...

I
try to be
fine
along the line
to take what's mine
i knew it the moment I saw you the Real time
the real moment I held you close when you cried
and all that i tried
and all that i did
will be

good

I am yours and I wish you could be mine

one
beautiful
baptismal
spectacular

day
(I am yours)

coming through the ice
igniting the fire with thousands of laboring logs
to burn through the ice
coming through the ice

falling down the 20th story balcony
down the the sidewalk where it's all going to happen
falling through cracking the sidewalk
coming through the ice

it's nice and the rolling of the dice
coming through the ice
reborn:2:1:0 yes here
time is fantastical time is nice

brings
guitars
rifts
i'm here coming through

the ice is cracking as i fall
falling up towards the sky going up toward heaven almost there rightasiputupmyhand
(coming through)
i think i know this is it stars suns

stars coming falling down now up
over and over turning
reborn i'm reborn smile a little bit reincarnation is nice
coming through the ice

Re(call)
hills likewhiteelephants
or(f

u
some[c]thing
li[k]e that)

away
away
tornado
away
pine
away
disappear
thin
thin
thinn­er
forever and always
y
o
u
know i think
you know
blown away
Hemingway
i'm blown(like you)
away

back when i could remember something fake
i think deep down inside i could understand and dream
and dream i do today but i've waited for my take
so one day i'll run down the dirt from the woods into the stream

that was who i was sitting desks apart little child
little child look at me it's me it's really me
look up at the sun the weather's a tad mild
(for my taste) i look at You and do you see it do you see

i think now you do and the waiting's worth it
and wait i did and wait and wait and wait and i waited for you
deep down knowing you really did (a little bit)
i just hope it's the same obsession you have like i too

time and time again (i will spend my eternity with you)
you told me people were meant to be with each other like the stars align in the sky
i agree oh god i agree (just love me) i want to
i want to feel your heart and my hand through your hair and sigh

i think this is the world dream you resemble it with perfection
you can take everything because you deserve it all
don't let me go don't let me be some kind of correction
or something and on and on i'm a little (tall

er) than you but no matter no matter so many differences yet the same
our hearts and souls match and it makes me smile
and you too I notice it You notice me
you see me you see me you see me i know you see me I feel you see me you see-
(for all it's worth it'll be worth the while)

lay

down                                                 right nex
t
       o

there       sleep                                                                      well

and sleeep tightttttttt
dream soft
dream
brig
                    ht

words ****                             words bite                        

time flies
time hurts

your Hair
your per
fect
face
like  a            sun
shining
some
where

wor
ds
am
i am
i know
to seed the
farm
and let the bodies
let them go
and let me go
i'll be right                there
to see it through and throw my hands right through your hair andc cry out yes and hold you close and put your lips right on my mouth
and eject
...
hold
me
close
...
and
go
away
i
now

i'm
lonely
on
vicarious
envy
you­
only

you only you only you only you only  you only  you only  you only  you only  you only  
love me
...

i ju
st w
ant
you
to t
ell
me y
ou l
ove
me s
i ca
n re
lax
whe
n i s
ee y
our
fac
e(s)

with a knife dipped in crimson fire
i murdered the red sky

(the doors of platinum)
twas god twas saul twas garden blue

what to be like a semi
i x actl y know what i knew

the blue waters of the earth could not
cleanse the pitch-black night

the riders of paul saw
saul dancing in the moonlight

and chirst he was a beautiful man
more beautiful than the secret diamonds of the universe

to take it into account of beauty of peace
its lie a thousand times over roll over the kids

whatta joke he tells me
with a blue glass blink to his eye

green three times two times five over a million
brings me here

you're humble i know
pray for me

saul or whoever cracks his knuckles and waits
thomas has to forgive again

mary was a symbol and judas hung
for it all

we all hang once in a while
over and over

to be through the bleeding doors the cracks
of the doors of platinum

step inside
and you'll never return

don't look back
or everything will disappear

but by chirst jesus the lord almighty god (jesus christ)
*it already has

t
          ire
                    swi  
                                ngs
                                      and s    i    d     e    w    a    l   k    s      
                                                etc.
up
||
fill


my
mind
through-------------------mytime

you're so
precious
so beautiful
like diamonds only
m  o r  e    s  o

as the sun shines

d
o
w
n

n
o
p
u

the ro
cks

death and destr/ction
may devour my mind
but no one can take my time
and etc etc tire swings and sidewalks fill my mind
beauty and your lips on mine

and beautiful I think we're doing just fine

the smile’s of thousands of lucky winners
please my trying and my doing
to be someone     unlike the rest
to win everything above the rest
to lose and get right back up again

it was always you
running and running i trip
but your hand
is right there
as usual
to pick me right back up
and send me back right to where i started
this is not a game this is the olympics this is murderball
it’s everything wrong that’s right
this is now this is to survive the survival of millions of natural selections
i’m the survivor i shall not die in vain
name on the paper sign here
-Survivor-

you are the definition of beauty and peace
of my hope my smile i can not frown when you're around
you look you smile as well and one day
our lips will meet as One

soforth the idea my love
your smile your face your laugh
my muse o muse descend as the angel
where are you i feel my heart

*there

there was a simile and a metaphor wrapped inside the finest golden linen inside a box and in the box was a dream and in that dream was a choice and in that choice was a life and in the seconds of bright light a time no one can possibly remember i was chosen i was born as i flew out somehow through the tides of the ocean and the rippling waters in a pond in the backyard was my hope and my peace and my gift wrapped inside wrapped around a little finger
                     and to cut the womb and let it flow out what is this why and how and nolonger must i suffer every single word of gratitude and fulfillment feels like a knife stuck in ice and now in my heart as a rainbow emerges from the rain an i bet you were happy i knew you were happy
                  thanks for sharing your great time while i sat and drowned in my own tears and my own sweat thanks for telling me what now was i am i just tell him because every breakdown every moment has led up to this to this and i wish to God i was older to get away from this to cut the womb the be reborn to cut the womb to cut the womb to cut the womb upside down down upside right left
to the circle to the circle never ending is what they said
thanks
for
telling me
about
your gr
eat
time
makes me
feel a whole lot better
easy to feel passed over in a time likethis
and you help i know you just want to help but this is getting so
getting so perfectly annihilating so perfectly exhausting so perfectly pure so perfectly wrapped like the bow ties of the gentleman around and i know i'm not that I know it and i cry myself to sleep and drown in my tears and my years i can't help but think that without you by my side all the time i'm

downwardspiraling towards a perfect circle in sync i can no longer wait and be the most patient man in the universe four long years can not turn to five and if so i selfdestruct i will nolonger yes no

we burn the sun
to the sound
of war drums

over two hundred to three is the ratio to the sun
the 1.618 is evident i am spiraling through 1 1 2 3 5 8 13
and back again to here but her smile her aura is always
worth it always Yes worth a Yes wink a Yes embrace this i love this Yes
over everysinglething

the flowers are calling and the grass is growing
the sun is shining and people are singing
playing the piano putting their bow on their strings
calling to anti-poison waking from slumber
arms in the sky raised high worshiping something
reading a book in the humid air breathing in non polluted oxygen
no one's invisible on this Saturday this memory this new past
as time flies by and the clock strikes two where's the rewind button again

shops are opening early this Saturday
my heart is opening later today i Faithfully know
out into the wilderness there we go
everyone's outside or worshiping
Saturday

if my heart's broken i just need a new one
(on Saturday)
people are calling movie's are playing
chairs are placed baseball is played
time is breathed in time is breathed out
everyone relaxes meditation is typical and beautiful
everyone's sitting and laughing somewhere this grand time
this special event only happens once a week so praise and worship
Saturday

check your center is this where i am where am i flee flee time is time is what time does and time is wasting light like a winter's day
and to wish that everyday would end faster and faster will just shorten the life to vibration and guitar strings

there was once a time when everyone was kind; no, there was never such a thing
but yes that doesn't matter and yes we can go one yes i will go on
beating on like Caraway into the past no yes the sky is cracking remember that one
film that one that so specific film no? no. i can't remember either i hope she loves me still
some way the gleam in her eye seems to be a little uh and little em
pty like that glass You have right in your hand give me a sip please

everyone's busy complaining about their own dreams but when they come up suddenly it's not enough, and that's your fault i think not minepleasestopthis please you're sitting there with that look on your face like ha-ha you're sad lock me up then

she loved me tell me she loved me please you destroy worlds right come on and tell me if you can let me know then there's the door and here i go
oh now you want me to stay because i'm enough right tell me i'm good
wait
hold on
i'll let you check your ****** notes one more time you haven't rehearsed this moment much have you
oh but you know everything and protect everyone
FREE WILL written on the wall there i see
wonderful and original, as everyone else is through lava rivers and the fire soaks me dry

is this it is this tell me she loves me his hand over her shoulder why do i even care still i said i quit so i quit
i don't think anyone can be ashamed to quit because we're living in a time where we think everyone deserves to please another with their accomplishments whether the mental or the physical
(oh great congratulations on your marriage)
well no one deserves to see my love if everyone expects it pay me just pay me
look at you you're disgusting ha-i'm sorry i meant i'm disgusting
we're all disgusting you and me
we're both one of kind so thanks for listening i guess (just look at you)
i know i know you love me and want the best for me
FREEWILL
words get closer every  time i look every time ilook everytimeilook-

time's a wasting through the seams an'
three's to gleam the sun beam dan
ce the trees of tilling through farming into a blackedout dream as of yesterday
as of yesterday and today why not anyway not not now
destroy and feast on the gardens expensive flowers grown soil
grow me up seed me down this town's going down
fire on the trees fire on the salt the fields salt the fields and push down and explode like
there's still a hope to look forward how dost you go
words inspiring ha to the yes through the Dance of the Swan rose queen and it disturbs me
a little
this feeds this dance this crow's dance goes a little like this.

i never ever said a word about you to hurt you
i gave you gifts and love and my Time
through a hardship i was right by your side

but hell
and now you turn your back
you think it's clever kinda funny to mess with my heart like this
(running away)
you ripped out my heart and tore it apart and left me for cold
the blue eyed round headed stranger once
a
gain

every time i get the chance for four years i have waited in the dust
and through the closing of the eyes i come to realize why
i feel like a flame about to burst
a time bomb about to blow
i can not ever go
this will not ever end another way
this will not end another way
find time to cry much later to(day) come on and tell me Dear
you couldn't even say it to my face
come on am i just such a disgrace to take it in
and let it flow
i choose to live
i choose to know
the hollow is a place that feeds my needs i choose to live
in thoughts of pure and thoughts of rage i will just sleep
and turn into the next
page
slowly
fall asleep
please
in the
morning let
me
choose to live
a little longer
a little stronger
please just carry me
this will end no
please just take me home my mouth was burning with passion and desire
but it's gone
(call an optimist call a doctor)
so take me home i choose to
live
this will end no other
way.

'Doctor' I called after he left
on the heel of his foot he turned, sort of old and grey, not whimsical nor lyrical not left
the wrong life the wrong dream
what, he says, angered i respond with haste
'There's no such thing as too much poetry'

abletosaygood bye one more time say
heyla ha-ha heyla ha-ha-ha hey
time's a ticking time bomb
anne why home anna time gone
no one's ever gonna hold me like a tomb me me down
throughout the ground no one's coming no one's arriving
meet you half way shove it all down

heyla ha-ha
i'm right here
sink in the black sea

right    so   where were       we?

Love I believe knows no bounds
no walls no rivers that are impossible to cross no mountains can ever separate those who Love
in Friendship and in the love between two souls such passion
i think everyone's got a little bit of goodness in their hearts
and through needles and knives and heartbreak there is some sort of glitter of Hope

somewhere and somehow this is life and without anyone so many heroes and the people
can be taken for granted until i realize this is it and love knows no bounds
nor earth nor the universe nor heaven nor hell can stop it
between me and my Life and me and the deepest friends, some I've never seen with my own two eyes
there are no bounds i wish for all a life of greatness and peace
if i had one wish it would be that that not just I to be happy but for All
that's the one prayer that i can still pray

and today there is that bright white shining light
that star that we can all go out and reach
my Life, my love, my fire my peace I hold my drink up to it all through differences So?

my hero my unseen Love my shapes
that's what I have to thank
i do I do Love all of you there's no way I couldn't
tears of joy are the greatest so that's what I shed
Love knows no bounds so I love everyone I can.

Adieu

what does never
(pull away pull away)

I'm capable of pulling a Plath or two
no I Really don't want to have dinner for one
i'll take seats for two please regardless of if anyone ever if ever shows up if shows up i ever as I ever was
lonely very very lonely right
here

yes please waitress I'll take a beer no wait a Coke please
while i wait here like an Echo waiting to be repeated who is this
why are you here (dance on and on to whatever song beautiful truly beautiful)

i'll be 20-something before time catches up to realize my words
the publication of dreams may become a reality and suddenly like a flash of thunder i become a white light
help me spread some sunshine because god knows that is why i sit here lonely
very very lonely

last night i had a dream about a truck and a gun
and i saw your beautiful face from far away and I wanted to rub it and hold you and love you forever and ever(i could never see you withanyoneelse)
i controlled batteries with my mind and charged the moon in the night
and I didn't ever want to die and there was a whisper and a shadow and a gun who killed the driver
and mine didn't work so i took the wheel sealed the deal and crashed it
due to the whisper
through that i was bathed into immortality reincarnation of flames

then i woke up lying next to you on a sunny day in the grass and Nature smiled
you were smiling and i was smiling 'ahhhhhh i have been reborn' i screamed in joy
and i drowned in her kiss and i was alive when i awoke i was all alive

but the day was the Ruin and all i wanted to do was see her
all day i could not find time to talk to engage
(lonely very very-
wandering around i felt nothing not nothing but something is nothing and nothing is something

at the holy water at the end of the day i saw her wanting to approach her
but i could not turning around like a spiraling out Fibbonaci
very lonely

i think i'm five years from now
sitting here table for one wishing for two
dearest Catullus you must have missed your brother so much
I'll pull a Plath if I have to

Vanish-ing into
air
come and let me touch your
hair.

re la la lin quish
forsewallthenon
the non
the anon and non and soon

deceived monster triumphs
over all there's a mist there's a ****** airy feeling
arise

believe your eyes
open up write it down and see
new words new earth new universe
I have arrived
open your eyes
breathe and
look