people look at me like i have a happy life
but they don't know about the ****** part
it may be **** but it is like a war head
without the sweet part
bout a father who did not try
bout a kid who did not cry
despite the kind of pain
that rain down inside
tore open the world
made him open his eyes
now he understands
what needs to happen  
to betray his own father

being left alone with the darkness you left me
I am still waiting for your forgiveness
sorry a thousand times filled with pain
but you left me in the darkness
if I could make it better would you forgive me
would you forgive the pain or leave me in the dark
with the darkness that consumes me
sorry for filling your eyes with unspoken tears
just for not saying sorry and not being there

i thought fittin in would help
i realized its like jumpin off the cliff
no one gives a crap
people trying to get laid
but end up getting the maid paid
people tryin seduction
but it gives them the reduction
why not go jumpin off
when everybody else is complainin
maybe lets see what im gettin into

as the car leaves
i wonder how far
before they come back
still waiting for only
for jack to come back
to reveal my fate
that they left the state

it came back the gunshots the bombs everywhere
now i can't move parallelized by the choke in my throat
my heart trying to escape with its life on the line in my chest
i try to move but something not letting me
i relive the day of the unspeakable
bodies everywhere
shivering with the same feeling
i wander when i am getting out
of the mind of hell

hey what are you doing
i'm doing this
but nobody going to like you
oh sorry
just listen to me
okay
(week later)
maybe i will try a drink

trying to feel better but keeps coming back
the image of a crash everyday
keeps invading my dreams becoming nightmares
everytime I be in that car I relive that day
the pain on my right arm to the my throat getting choked by fear
everytime i be in that car i see the coffee flying from that crash
maybe i will not freak out again if i go in that car