It begins with my heart and every circle I drew around it
in clouds
so that it would be hidden
yet not unreachable

It begins with my hands and all the water I have wasted
washing and rubbing out of my skin,
all the memories of moments
that should be forgotten,

that are trapped in my mind with all its corruptions
easily baited and quick to
taint thoughts with whispers
spoken in others voices

that began to alter my eyes
and cut along the edges
blinding all sense between my heart
and I

I began to see deformity
in everything I saw
and I could only see me

I began to lose
recognition of my own voice
because I could no longer hear me

I began to smell hatred
and a rotting stench of shame
because rubbing my skin raw was no longer enough

I began to lose
recognition of my own voice
because it got lost with the others

I began to feel
like the voices were god
like the voices were science

It ends with my heart, protected
from everyone but myself.

I watch seven stars dance
but only two dance to the beat
and only one of those two likes to dance

I watch seven stars laugh
but only 4 laugh with a musical quality
and the second one does not find anything funny

I watch seven stars
idle away and never once look down

I watch seven stars
flourish and sing their praises

but their light and dazzle confuses
their perceptions

and out of seven stars
none of them can truly see