A **** is nothing but a plant
in the wrong place

go find a flower bed
that works for you

bloom.

I really shouldn't
get another cat
but they just
keep finding me
and wrapping themselves
around my leaks and holes
and purring until I feel better
and it's probably best for my
mental health
to get at least one more cat so that
my other two aren't bored hanging
out with each other
I mean,
three's a crowd, right?
and the only thing missing
from this fever dream
is a crowd of kittens
all loving and pure.

Strangely enough
I didn't dread today like
all those years before
but that's probably because
today finally has meaning other
than possession and control
than bowing down and worshipping

I mean,
we bought the guy a truck one year
and he complained about how he didn't
like the color of green

but I digress
as father's day finally has some
significance and in the
afterglow of traditional ideals
we went fishing all day
and talked about stuff
as equal men
and a man I only met a couple years back
became my father
and the one who birthed me is
nowhere to be found.

one of the greatest
mysteries of my
life
revolves around
a dozen roses
and a card that read:

"for crying out loud..."

She had eyes
like the Devil's Accountant
always making sure
we were up to some good
and I never thought she'd
find me
while I did some sleeping
in the grass
of an empty lot
in the old neighborhood
and of course the
divine punishment was rich
with irony
and pure and good
as is the case when one
inflicts the best
sort of pain

the kind of pain that
teaches a lesson

"it's probably for the best"
the old woman had whispered
to her
after
she miscarried what could
have been my older sister or brother
and the list of unnamed secrets
grew

We stood in line for twenty minutes behind a family whose baby wouldn’t stop staring at me. Naturally, I waved at the baby and the father sneered at me and moved so that the baby faced the other way. It was probably for the best because I have no idea how to entertain children past making faces and looking like a fool and seeing as I was surrounded by people on all sides, that wouldn’t end well. When we finally paid admission, they stamped the word SMILE on the back of each of our right hands in ink that looked suspiciously like blood. But my brother was ready to get on some rides and so we entered Joyland, a dinky amusement park hidden within the largest actual park in town. Everything was funnel cake and screaming children and entirely different songs being played from each ride giving the air this glossy, almost flexing texture. Joyland has apparently been around since forever and maintenance was likely last done shortly after the park was built. On one of the rides, a security bar popped off and the machine started making a horrible thudding sound when our cart was parallel to the ground but the ride operator was too busy shamelessly checking out the *** of his coworker to notice and I pondered, before what I assumed would be my dramatic and terrible death, how often this had happened before over the years and how silly it would be to die over some pastel colored short-shorts. But that’s how these things happen. “No more noble deaths” we had all agreed on at some point and we put down our swords and took up shovels for the earth and everything was good until someone looked at us wrong and there we were again staring at short-shorts and letting an ancient ride disintegrate with people on it because seeing and hearing two different things at the same time is not something that gets covered during the training days at Joyland.