I'm pretty. I know I'm not ugly.
I decided that.
Beauty is a choice.
I take care of myself.
I love people.
So I am kind.
I smile for years.
I have empathy in my tears.
I laugh till it's pain.
I hurt and feel good.
I'm honest with them.
I'm honest with myself.
Yet, I still have no clue
how it has felt.
I have loved men.
Or at least I think I have.
I haven't been loved back.
This leaves me to wonder...
is it that...
I'm unlovable?

How can I really articulate myself to you?
I shake and consistently smile.
My cheeks are in pain.
My breath stops.
The brain receives no oxygen.
I can't think.
My heart won't beat.
I guess, in a way I am perfectly articulating myself to you.
You make me loose control.

I don't enjoy liking you.
You take up to much space in my head.
I'm unsure if I consume your heart.
That unknown is scary.
But I'm happy with you.
Can we be true?

If you teach me and I learn, then that will be the best gift you can ever give me.

Dear friend,
You are not supported by many
but I support you.
Yes, it is difficult to stand on a chair with three legs.
But don't look for a fourth one by breaking your own.
Modification for acceptance is suicide.
Don't **** your identity.
Soon they'll have a rebirth
and find themselves.
And then your chair will be more stable.
Because you stayed yourself, they will praise you.

I wonder
why it is taking so long.
Is it me?
No.
Remember you.
You are yourself.
That alone is wealth.
Don't worry,
the shine is just brightening up.
Enough may seem like it's enough.
But there is more that you can't even imagine.
Wait.
Patience will be your friend for now.

Don't worry my friend,
bad feelings will pass.
Be thankful for them,
I keenly ask.
Without these sorrows,
there's no appreciation.
You'll feel it more tomorrow,
the happiness acclimation.