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Dec 2016 · 308
Petals
Arcanum Dec 2016
Asking weather he does or he doesn't
You will rip yourself apart
Every layer every tug will come at a cost
It wont hurt for you seek answers
For you are foolishly blind
Trying to feel as you tear up inch by inch of your heart
To the warmth of the sun you woke up with such hopes
Sharing your color with the rest of the world
And the smell of your petals is what lured such dark shade
As you did not pick him but he picked you instead
You felt touched and desired but a display you became
Sadly but true you started to fade
Soft and then lifeless your body expressed
Nothing more than a moment that's been taken away
You realized a pain that is no longer there
You've been return to the grounds from where you once came
12/31/16
Dec 2016 · 252
Oceans Heart
Arcanum Dec 2016
I keep trying to breathe underwater
To find the treasure that's never been seen
As I think I get closer, my soul begins to leave
For I can't hold it any longer it's like faith is avoiding me
A desire of having a slightest glimpse is over killing me
The cold of its depth is crippling, as I try to break free
But even in that moment I can only feel peace
For I've witness my true power for loving what I've never seen
12/31/16 To the year of Winter freezing my heart
Feb 2015 · 410
Indefiniteness
Arcanum Feb 2015
I feel so lost and confused in the graveyard of my dreams
Like a crystal circus ball where the timeline's infinite
Although I am young and full to my capacities
I am shackled to a sorrow that has no destiny
For so it's been told at least it's been making me believe
Of someone that I know nothing of nor ever even seen
Just a comment just a thought
Maybe the ignorance of fools that just might be
That lurked into the deepest part of me
Where I've been used as a tool
To be the one where they have unburden their own self pity
As here I am now in the remainder of their ashes
There is filth there is darkness
An uncertainty that scares all calmness
There is more than only madness
There, I lay there in the obscureness of my answers
Of the person that I might be or never ever see
Feb 2015 · 394
Shut Open
Arcanum Feb 2015
How hard do I have to shut my eyes for the tears not to come out?
Is that not the solution?
For the pain drowning me inside

Why does it hurt if it's only water I drop?
Why do I cry if I have my eyes shut?

Maybe I screamed, maybe I said what I did not mean,
But I gave you something from me

Why, did you not want it?
What was it that you didn't like?

But, you know what?
I will try not to care
I will let it all out

I will open my eyes
And shower the ground
I will not drown for what you answered back

Clear crystal water drops so bitter and dry
to the taste of the my mouth

A gift from my heart
The gift of a life
And you, you ignored it gave it your back

It's great, you've only injured me hard
And don't worry about me
Shall I not worry about this

I will comfort my ego
And forget that my eyes could've ever shed a tear
Feb 2015 · 986
Emptiness
Arcanum Feb 2015
It burns when the tears come out, with a runny nose
And the sadness taking over my pale face

It's that feeling of emptiness
That dries my soul, leaves it weak with no colors of joy

The tinggleing around my body a fear thinking of tomorrow
and not seeing the daylight once more

Killing the family circle and wondering if it really broke
Imagine me not here at least not anymore
Here comes that feeling of emptiness making me feel that I dont belong

For how can it burn?

The feeling is too strong
As my eyes turn red and my tears are warm

They're too salty I think
But again they're washing the bitter away

It's that feeling of emptiness I can't make go away
I don't see it healing, for I imagine me not here

At least not anymore

So see, it does burn and leaves nothing to solve
but ashes of memories that will fade away

As that feeling of emptiness was here to stay
Feb 2015 · 393
Unpertained
Arcanum Feb 2015
I have known your secrets all along
But I don't dare to follow doubt
For shall I fall into mysteries
I could lose what this has come to be

Nothing perfect nothing bad
But just enough to catch my eyes
Where did you come from?
Where did you go?
Those are the questions I don't behold
Nor shall I dig deeper
Nor shall I loose sight
Because somehow I've become attached

Missing moments
Missing lives
Atrocious clusters in my mind
Desired emotions wasted on count

Countless necessities on strangers behalf
Giving a deal, making a bond
Becoming closer in others eyes

Nothing perfect nothing bad
But just enough to grasp my eyes
Where did you come from?
Where did you go?
Those are the questions I yet don't behold

As I want to let go
Of something that never belonged
Feb 2015 · 384
In the blue
Arcanum Feb 2015
Even in the darkest colors I yet see our faith
Of many promises that now have faded away
When hope is what glimmered throughout
The glance of our eyes
Lies of the unspoken shattered the hearts
It seemed pitch black just before every sunrise
Where it felt so lonely and cold to each touch
The fragrance grasped in a memory still lost
But yet remembered in the last of thoughts
As the darkness lit into the lightest skies
All I could do was zone out in the blue
For every morning I still think of you
Feb 2015 · 377
Rising Falls
Arcanum Feb 2015
As darkness falls
The fear rises
From tombs of stones
Carved from the anger
Where you’ve been put
None the less
It’s well deserved
Yet a doubtful smirk
Praying for survival
Sins emerged of broken words
Of how it once was meaningful told
Tales and myths
Shall travel further
Upon earth’s core
Where it no longer matters
As darkness rises
The fear falls
Into tombs of stones
Carved from the anger
Where you’ve been laid
Into earth’s core
Where you no longer matter
Feb 2015 · 482
Obmutescence
Arcanum Feb 2015
Sometimes we hurt in silence

Because we think that’s all we have

It’s a secret place

That only one can hack  

Where no one sees your shame

And everything seems safe

Such a silent enemy

Relentlessly awaiting in place

Things aren’t always said nor done in purpose ways

Some peculiar feelings just can’t be kept held

As tears begin to shed

Hoping someone could only understand

But silence is just there

In every step of the way

Withdrawing all positives

Pushing people away

As silence pursues at its best

But doesn’t account for the rest

When there’s people that care

And keep you standing straight

Of how they hold some faith

As you let it linger in vain

Sometimes we hurt in silence

Because we think that’s all we have

But we are our own enemy

That’s simply a way of life
Feb 2015 · 395
Abiding Solitude
Arcanum Feb 2015
Without question I chose for you

Without answers I thought I knew

For so I've joined a lie within

A signature that holds no ink

Games that have no winners treat

All just a race for who ends sick

A lullaby of crying winds

And flying sorrows crossed in-between

Performing like spears that sink

Deeper than touch ever will

Taking more than just one hit

Crawling into the arms of my enemy

Warmth that cures and soothes thy wounds

Like a shelter safely held onto

To where he won't have an escape

Becoming the hunter not the pray

Unsatisfied hunger vanishing away

Easily gone like it was yesterday

No more to ask

Expectations fled by

As I had chosen thinking I knew

Believed a lie I fed and grew

Deluding my heart sickening the mind

Where I could hear my eyes tear out

To a point where it shouldn’t matter

I shall let go of this disaster
Feb 2015 · 454
Bygone
Arcanum Feb 2015
Nothing seems more challenging

Than to speak of the truth

But sometimes no matter how hard

Things might break through

There’s paths that may never be crossed

For those who choose not to go on

Paths that shall never be seen

By those who cherish their lies

Moments of wisdom are carried in silence

Seldom moments of love acted upon

Worshiping circumstances of shame

Breaking forcefully ones inner faith

None the less one can still feel

Constant bearing of what now is real

Presuming others actions

Regretting owns petitions

None the less we witness paths of pain

Becoming a chain reviving bygones of hate

Repeating stories, stories that last

Challenging the truth

Remember no matter how hard

Things might just break through

— The End —