I am hurt and confused but I shouldn’t say a word

I hurt you more, I hurt you first

I wasn’t aware, oh but you were

Yet I hurt you more, I hurt you worst

I gave her a face, pretty poise and graced,

I see it some nights, with yours in the way

But have the perfect retort for that, wouldn’t you say?

“How many times was I haunted by your mistake?!”

It’s frustrating when you say this is not what I deserved

When every reaction of yours screams it louder than any words

When every time I trip or fall

I’m reminded you tripped most of all

To forgive you is to forgive me

Can’t have that, can we?

You say I’m changed, yet you can’t say it’s okay

and you should know that’s all I need to hear you say

But that’s not how it works, is it?

It’s only okay when you’re in the right mood to dismiss it

But when I’m desperately clawing for air

and all I’m given is a handful of despair

I forget why I’m staying, it’s useless

Compared to this, death is much less ruthless