if you ever buy me a coffee mug
know that it will become my favorite,
and that i will use it faithfully every day.

but understand, if you ever decide to leave,
i will tell you through gritted teeth
that i never liked it anyway.

i will tell you out of spite that i shattered it,
but that coffee mug will remain in tact,
and collect dust in a corner until you come back.

if you never do, i won't ever use that mug again,
instead i'll fill it with paper clips & pens
and try not to remember that you gave it to me.

- m.f.

I try to write a poem,
but poems are too hard
Rhyming is for losers
and airy-fairy bards

To put a pen to paper
and write about your life
I've had enough of all of those,
they only cause me strife

Free-verse script is awful,
for fools without a beat
Repetition's far too simple
just repeat, repeat, REPEAT

Those lovey-dovey ode-things,
that wishy-washy crap
And poems about hatred,
you all deserve a slap

Spare me all your ramblings,
I don't care how you feel
Your self-expression surely stinks
of mouldy day-old eel

To tell a tale of wonder
never ceases too be trite
To sing of magic wonders
is nothing but pure *

Your metaphors are useless,
your imagery is vile
Your sense of diction makes me gag,
I cannot stand your "style"

So save me your quotations,
please spare me all your rhyme
Shove that poem up your rear
and cease to waste my time

I look at what I've written,
this jumble of clichés
Looks like I wrote a ****** poem
so I'm the one to blame!

like fools, we dove into the shallow end.
head first. blind to the danger.
the jump itself was bliss.

fingers interlocked, laughter pouring from our mouths,
eyes bewitched and sparkling naively.
we were childlike. godlike. untouchable.

however our euphoria ended abruptly
at the reality of the encroaching cement bottom -
awaiting our skulls

but by the time we realized what was happening
it was too late.
you cannot stop gravity.

the smiles faded from our mouths.
and we went down,
down, down.

no hope for air.
no flailing limbs.
no final breath.

not a chance at revival.

we were dead on impact.

we never got to swim.