"vibrated" poems
The bullet flew so quickly from the pistol it felt like the blood in my veins stopped for a moment
As if quantum physics were just a mere myth
Of random laws and physicists
Each individual cell and atom in my body stopped and rushed to abyss
Thump, thump.
As the bullet reached the end of your skull, I swore I died instead of you
But instead of dying and leaving the realm of the living I enter bliss and happiness
Flowers scattered over bright green grass for miles,
Soft and whispering wind rushed past my freckled skin
The trees swayed with the wind
It brought an epitome of perfection, only your carcass brought death and decay
Snapping back to reality, your eyes rolled back, and your jaw opened wide
I wanted to tear it open, to give you a somewhat permanent evil smile
Your body hit the ground so hard, the sound vibrated across my body, giving my heart the ability to beat normally again
You looked so peaceful for a mere moment
I swore I could have kissed you even though I despise your very being
Your skin quickly went colorless, and you laid there so still
I burst into panicked laughter, and covered my filthy mouth
It was definitely rude to laugh at someone's death
My stomach growls, and my hands shake with satisfaction
I've finally done it. I killed my insecurities
After a short moment of freedom and what seemed to be like genuine tears of joy...
Your eyes roll back to normal, and they focus me closely
Rising from the ground, you flick your hair back as if the wind blew it out of place
You fix your shirt, as if the blood stains weren't there
"It's so silly to think you could get rid of me so easily," you say.
I'm never going to feel alive ever again
Mar 22, 2014
Mar 22, 2014 at 7:53 AM UTC
The world is my canvas,
I am the rainbow that illuminates it.
My colors fill the open spaces surrounding me.
I see beauty with my eyes closed,
I speak my wisest words without a strain in my vocal cords,
I lead an army with no weapons.
I speak when I am not spoken to.
I create Unity and destroy resentment.
A man I once bought dinner for
had a body filled with darkness ,
I met his lurking shadow before I was introduced to his warm soul.
"I can't make it another day"
"this is no longer a game that I can play"
"I want to break away from my fate"
"3 big macs and a bottle of ***** that will help me think straight"
"I have this hole in my heart but its feeling more like a never ending weight"
his overused cardboard sign hung off of the side of his garbage filled shopping cart.
his fingertips froze against my palm
we talked about his life
his brother and mom
their drug addictions
and how he has survived so long,
he was 32
with no home.
he understood life in only one tone.
i feed,
I listen,
I speak influential truth.
what I said to him,
through my guitar callused hands,
saved his delicate life.
Purple vibrated through his toxic chest.
Purple.
the color of
wealth
power
creativity,
independence
dignity and wisdom.
purple filled His veins.
My weaponless army will proceed to expand.
and my soul will always be available for helping hands,
my guidance will forever lurk in the dangerous shadows,
I will speak when I am not spoken to because
speaking out of turn
saves souls.
and one day, everyone's soul will drown in purple.
Nov 13, 2014
Nov 13, 2014 at 11:01 AM UTC
When I look into the mirror
And stare at my own reflection
I see a stranger sneering at me
I see the patch of dark around my eyes
I see my hair going grey
I see the blotchy skin and wrinkles on my face
It all makes me think
How rapid is the flight of youth
Once I was a bubbly girl
Full of charm with dreamy eyes
The golden vistas cheered my heart
In my dreams I scaled to touch the skies
Love vibrated every nerve
But now a sad change has come over
It all makes me think
How rapid is the flight of time
Once I thought how bright and sweet was life
Agile were my movements, could walk miles
Fatigue I never knew, supple limbs never ached
Life was a roller coaster ride
Today when I look at the young
With wind in their skirts and sunbeams in their eyes
I see the stark change that years have brought
And wonder how rapid the onset of old age is
Though my beauty has burnt away
And my bones have a brittle grate
Still I would like to hold on stubbornly
Looking at each day for what next day brings
As I still have a hopeful heart
And wish to embrace life as it comes
To make it a sweet labor of love
So I ‘rage, rage against the dying of light’!
May 4, 2016
May 4, 2016 at 10:23 PM UTC
Earlier today, painting was the activity that we had planned
I have a support teacher who would always lend a hand
She had left the class to get the paint all mixed
While I stayed behind to get the toys and props all fixed
She came back and bore bowls of red, white and blue
Made me think of...well, made me think of you.
Lunchtime I visited a store and neatly displayed on low shelves
Arranged so immaculately as if magically done by elves
Were cases upon cases stitched together with only zips
They almost instantly bent a smile to my lips
Their colours shone brilliant red, white and blue
Made me think of...well, made me think of you.
Passed by a shop selling accessories and apparel
Merchandise dangled on wall hooks and some in a jumble
On the adjacent wall something caught my eye
Carried all the neat little tote bags one could ever buy
One peeking from a corner was red, white and blue
Made me think of...well, made me think of you.
Walked by a building, so modern-looking and new
Down on one side almost obscured from view
Were these horizontal rows of dancing neon lights
Stopped for a minute just to soak in the sights
Then I realised that they flickered red, white and blue
Made me think of...well, made me think of you.
Waited for the bus to get home at my usual bus stop
Whilst waiting, I shifted and from my bag something did drop
Bent over and picked my coin pouch that had fallen out
Looked up only to see another commuter lingering about
On his pack was a sticker which boasted red, white and blue
Made me think of...well, made me think of you.
Bus was packed, found a seat in the back row
Sat myself down, I peered briefly out the window
Engine under me, I scanned around to those who were seated
Observed the floor beneath my shoes as it vibrated
My pair of Adidas, oh my, they're red, white and blue
Made me think of...well, made me think of you.
Got home, put my bag down and sank into the sofa
Switched on the telly, on was the Food Network's "Barefoot Contessa"
Surfed through the channels, caught a real estate commercial
Promoting prime land in a country not anywhere regional
Splashed on the screen, a flag - red, white and blue
Made me think of...well, made me think of you.
End of the day, it is best that I hit the sack
Allow some rest for my poor aggravated back
But not till I complete the words you're currently reading
I'm thinking, dreaming and furiously typing
How do I end this? Hmm...red, white and blue?
I'm thinking and dreaming...and wishing I'm with you.
Aug 8, 2014
Aug 8, 2014 at 9:08 PM UTC
It happened to be a Frontier of deception
cowards in fear with no visual perception
Tender feet blister from the miles they run
Enlightenment was needed, we lost the meaning of fun
Struggle was a word that become a wish in our heads
For what We were going through ripped our courage to shreds
A weeping song vibrated at night
To carry my brother to the never ending light
Forsaken children taken from the ones that they loved
Family's driven through madness, here his life had been shoved
Down a drain where one should take there last breath
So there for Inception was the misconception before my best friends unmeaningful death
Feb 21, 2014
Feb 21, 2014 at 1:18 AM UTC
I spent all my cash
on a stripper named Gypsy,
but we vibrated
and now
beams of light
shine from my chest
Jan 15, 2014
Jan 15, 2014 at 7:08 PM UTC
She pulled up her shawl and left the house
Gone to get more tea
And all the people passing by
And all the noises eating at her ear
Could not grasp her attention
Attending only to herself
Brilliant and Boisterous her thoughts
A majestic melody of their own
So how could she not be secure?
In her soul’s symphony
The strings vibrated her vessel
The horns heckled her heart
The drums beat down her darkness
And wisdom conducted alongside grace
Matching one another’s pace
Astute in one another’s ache
At conducting timelessly, never being late
It was almost as if their union was fate
Almost being key for it surely did take
Tireless effort, and sacrifices to make
The two into each other’s esteemed mate
Aug 25, 2018
Aug 25, 2018 at 9:46 AM UTC
How intimate this is
to bath with another
the wetness of me
surrounding you
with the wetness from the shower head
I brought you up
as you lifted me out
wanting this upon the floor
I whispered no with my fingers down your back
and you leaned me against the wall
The glass in the room
seemed to echo my moans
the acoustics so gentle
as our bodies beated out the rhythm
of an escalating in and out
We were building up a sweat
from the steam and our heat
and in heat we were
for I came as you were in me
and you kissed me then
My fingers through your hair
and my walls vibrated
as you came into me hard and spent
I felt it all in me
How intimate this is
Nov 5, 2012
Nov 5, 2012 at 2:43 AM UTC
I walked into a sunset that did not belong to me,
Its vivid colours burning across the Mediterranean Sea.
In a fragile, elusive moment of composure
I gazed at the choppy sea moving closer
To the rugged, pebbly, rocky shore
Where I stood alone against the Rock.
The Rock of Gibraltar watched with a smile
As the turbulent Med pulsating with life
Scattered its waves against the strand,
And the sapphire waters kissed the ancient land.
The stormy sea embraced the coast
With fierceness intangible as a ghost.
The air vibrated with a taste of freedom,
With barely audible words of wisdom
That travelled across the centuries
To fill the tangy air with memories.
The voices from the past enveloped the Rock
In an alluringly mythical, protective cloak.
I gathered the strength I drew from the Rock;
Fears discarded, the resolve growing strong,
I walked the Med Steps to the very top
Against a dazzlingly splendid backdrop
Of the breathtaking views of the bay,
Basking in the aura of fears thrown away.
Intoxicated by the beauty, hungry for more,
I was feeling elated to the very core.
The fear of heights temporarily conquered,
The contentment felt almost awkward.
Suddenly, the world seemed a different place:
Offering the nature's graceful embrace.
As the starry night slowly descended,
In my solitude, I felt protected
By the mighty Rock standing tall and grand
Guarding the ancient, immemorial land.
Copyright: Nara Hodge 2018
Jul 23, 2018
Jul 23, 2018 at 1:31 PM UTC
Love saved my life
It wasn’t long ago
when I received the call
I remember it like yesterday
It was bed time
ready to crashed when the
township called
expressing my brother had expired
someone had took his life
shot him in the head
At that very moment
my entire life shattered
into a million pieces
nowhere to be found
Quickly I rushed to
the hospital in the
hope maybe he was
still breathing, still moving
but the outcome
was everything but that
Few days after
we’ve put him to rest
in his last resting place
he was only nineteen
Felt like a dream
refused to believed
i prayed to God
to not allowed it be true
when I awake
day dreaming
But sooner and later
you always always
have to wake up
Hatred strengthened
to a point
I was ready for war
with whomever involved
Strapped ready to fight
when I realized because
of my faith this wasn’t
the way for I’ll rot in hell
Not long after
depression kicked in
started hearing voices
all through my head
Voices
I didn’t recognized
whispering to me
It was time to joined him
meaning
my brother to a better place
I remember
I sat in my car
with my glock clacked back
against my temple
ready to pulled
the trigger
when my phone
vibrated and said
It was from love
I decided to answered
and told her my story
had no more desire
to live This was
my good bye
Then I started crying
and she cried along with me
and prayed with me
tell me to come home
she’ll make this better
she didn’t want to lose me
in a word
she was carrying my son
which I’ve heard
for the first time ever
It was at that moment
when my life started over
a clean slate at a new life
and still today
our love has
grown stronger
she showed me the
love I always needed
this woman is the
reason I did not drown
In my depression
In my sorrow
In my anger
Everyday she came
looking for me
I knew how blessed
I am to have her
in my life today
This is my reason
I care for those
Who haven’t find
love and have no one
to call their own
Because truly I truly
don’t know what
would I do today
without my wife
in my life for
She is my treasure
and the reason
this is my reason
I’ll always choose
Love
Jun 26, 2018
Jun 26, 2018 at 9:57 AM UTC
he used me everyday
his favorite electric soul
power he did know
distance I did go...
abuse always did follow
one day he found me
drained, rusted,
& out of juice
our magnetic force
had finally come loose
he cried frantically
desperately fixing me up
with man made tools
It was simply to late
a dead lover was his fate
lucky he
able to revive me
with little life left
I vibrated with long pauses
I had to return with proper causes
told my boy, I'm no toy
now kiss my achy breaky heart
only then will I begin again,
only then will our love restart!
Jun 6, 2014
Jun 6, 2014 at 11:04 PM UTC
I came out of the north-west
Staggering from the storm
The surgeons had repaired my body
And my mind hung by one hinge
So I headed for the coast of Wales
To assume the healing rhythm of the sea
And breathe the briny air
Where no-one knew me
Nor called my worn out name
Sweet freedom in isolation
And so, in smiling solitude
I walked and smoked too much
Staring at the moody ocean
As we all inevitably do
As though it holds answers
And indeed it does
The answer is "being"
One hot but breezy day
I followed the coast from north to south
Not too far but far enough
Until I came upon a harbour
Tiny and insignificant
But a harbour nonetheless
With a clutch of small boats
Bobbing and swaying lazily
On the backwater slack water tide
And somewhere close by
A nautical bell tolled the rhythm
Of an endless heedless movement
And an oddly comfortable melancholy
Rocked me in it's arms
Lost and found
Beginning and end
In as much as everything matters
Though nothing matters much
This place was nothing to me
No more than countless others
But that harbour bell
So patient and so constant
Touched something deeper than knowledge
Perhaps it was the state of my health
Or the glowing heat of the day
But some vulnerable receptor
Vibrated to that gentle toll
I've been in many places in my life
And seen wondrous famous sights
All seared into my minds eye
But their memories will last no longer
Than the haunting harbour bell
By Phil Roberts
Mar 29, 2016
Mar 29, 2016 at 5:36 AM UTC
You are my dragon
You are my imaginary friend
You are my love-light
You are my heart beats end
You are the window to my soul
When my smile wants to
Descend
You lift me up
You shower light
From above me and below
Your dragon fire of love
Ignites my soul
Again
You are my unicorn
You are my buried treasure
You are the thing
Everyone says that
Does not exist
I feel you in my veins
I feel your tender bliss
I know your magic kiss
Never solicitous
Even when they say
You don't exist
We are stars
Communicating with each other
You are my sister
You are my brother
My Sacred father
Our Divine Mother
When I am asked
How do you know
Prove your higher power lives
I wonder how, I wonder if
People truly know what
Love is
I have never had to prove
The love that I feel
The way that your light
Can heal
Your touch
The chills that rush
Around my everything
My temple heart
My body's Internet
As I connect with
Lightworkers here on earth
We reach out to understand our birth
Together we experience
Your unforgettable worth
For without this light
I could not fight
My warrior heart would
Fall apart
And
Die
You are my strength from within
That is why
You are my dragon
You are my imaginary friend
You are my love-light
You are my heart beats end
You are the window to my soul
When my smile wants to
Descend
You lift me up
You shower light
From above me and below
Your dragon fire of love
Ignites my soul
Again
And
Again
I don't have to win
I could never lose
I want to share your love
But we all have to choose
To see it on our own
To feel it in our blood
To make in you
A home
My Phoenix rising
When I think of what you created
The connections that we have
The starlight between us
The way that you guide us
The way that you lead us
I know we are only as far
Away from one another
As the next star
I sat on the beach
Trying to reach you
Earnest in my heart
Was my prayer
To feel you there
To stare
I looked to the heavens
My eyes married the sky
I watched as electricity
Vibrated and waved
Between each starlight
Stars, your creation
Just as we are
Your worldwide
Love destination
The stars shine together well
Let this be our magic
Let this be our spell
When we look into the night
Let this be a mirror for living
A way for us to understand
That we too can be giving
To each other
Shining light all around
One another
My neighbor
My sister
My landlord
My brother
Animals
Our Fathers
And our
Mothers
You make me proud
To be a star for you
With you
I am also a tree
I'm a bird
We are free
I am the song in your hands
Your favorite love letter
Your favorite note
Every word that you spoke
I am written on
The universe in your
Temple heart
And you are
By far
My earth
My wind
My water
You are
My fire
You are
My eternal breath of life
My dragon
You are my imaginary friend
You are my love-light
You are my heart beats end
You are the window to my soul
When my smile wants to
Descend
You lift me up
You shower light
From above me and below
Your dragon fire of love
Ignites my soul
Again
And
Again
And
Again
I believe
tHE tERRY tREE
Nov 2, 2014
Nov 2, 2014 at 5:29 PM UTC
I walked past my pantry
Late one Friday night
To the sounds of what appeared to be
The goings on of a party inside
I grabbed a hold the latches
Swung wide open the door
With absolutely no earthly idea
Of what was soon in store
Colorful lights were flashing
Somewhere in the back
I moved aside the ketchup and mayo
To see where it was at
I took out the pickles and saltine's
So I could better see
What all the commotion was inside
Of my food pantry
That's when I saw the flashing lights
Inside the jar of Nutella
I picked it up right away
Me being a some what curious fella
As I held it at eye level
It vibrated in my hands
In what felt like a driving rhythm
From a 70's Disco band
Can't say I wasn't nervous
As I loosened up the lid
No telling what was going on inside
What dangers lay ahead
With both hands slightly shaking
I removed the rounded top
There was a party in the making
And it was going on non stop
The Nutella had it's boogie on
Or if you prefer, it's groove
Whatever you wish to call it
A party was the mood
There was a strobe light and confetti
Even a tiny Disco ball
As I gazed over the edge of the jar
I saw banners wall to wall
I guess you could say Nutella
Is quite the party treat
That may cost you at the grocery store
But once home the cover charge is free
Jul 4, 2014
Jul 4, 2014 at 8:22 AM UTC
We were sitting in a restaurant
Table set for two
One of those single couple booths
Perfect for me and you
We spoke of money and
I refused to let you pay for me
Maybe I have too much pride
But I’m not who your ex used to be
The overhead lights reflected perfectly and
I was sure that you were not a mistake
Your ocean eyes vibrated my soul
And then I spilled my milkshake
Blood rushed to my face
And I looked away in shame
But then I heard you laughing
And something in my heart changed
Somehow you weren’t embarrassed
Or uncomfortable with my lack of grace
But instead that heart-shattering smile
Was plastered across your gorgeous face
And then you surprised me yet again
As you opened up your soul out of the blue
And though you spoke nonchalantly
I knew those thoughts were haunting you
I painted versions of your stories
Across the walls of my mind as you spoke
Memorizing the imagery and your feelings
About your insufficient social support
And while I know I can’t be everything for you
I can try to be better than the last
So you have somewhere safe to run
When you need to escape your broken past
Because although the table spanned miles between us
And we were connected only by our fingertips
I could feel our souls grazing one another
As they tangled together in electric riffs
At that very moment
Staring into your eyes, gold and blue
I felt the first real chance
That I might truly love you
Aug 21, 2017
Aug 21, 2017 at 3:42 PM UTC
I was playing, jumping up and
Down, I was cartwheeling
Right side up
To
Upside down,
I heard a noise, I heard a grumble
Was it thunder
The sky Is blue??
Where did that noise come from
Was it you.
I walked along, and heard it again
I looked under my jumper
There it goes again.
Are you
Shouting,
Rumbling,
Talking
To me, what do want, speak up
"Gruummmbbblle"
"Raaaaarrrrrr"
I don't speak belly?
I do feel hungry though,
"Grumbleeeeee"
Is it that what you want,
Is that which you need.
"Ok"
Home we go, moving fast,
Still talking each louder than the last.
"I need you MUMMY"
"I need you DADDY"
My belly has been talking
Its telling me its hungry,
Like thunder a rumbling rolls
Around my empty tum,
"Goodness me"
"Goodness you"
I'll make you both a sandwich
Make both you happy.
"Thanks mummy"
"Tummy said thanks too"
Grumble went my tum
As both of us were filled with
Peanut,
Jelly,
Toast
It was good tasting,
And filled my taste buds as
Well as a friend that
Grumbled,
Rumbled,
Talked
Of his need to be filled up too.
"Each chew"
"Each swallow"
"Quieter than the last"
I had eaten my sandwich
Crusts and all. My belly vibrated, I think
It was a sleep, I felt much better now I had something
To eat. Empty plate that's good to see,
How are you both?
"Mummy we are very happy"
With a grin I rubbed my tummy,
"MMmm"
My belly just spoke
My belly has a need
"What is that little man"
Grinning ear to ear,
"CHOCLATE MUMMY"
Is that you talking or tummy rumbling again,
My belly just likes to be full for me to eat.
Feb 7, 2015
Feb 7, 2015 at 11:17 AM UTC
I came out of the north-west
Staggering from the storm
The surgeons had repaired my body
And my mind hung by one hinge
So I headed for the coast of Wales
To assume the healing rhythm of the sea
And breathe the briny air
Where no-one knew me
Nor called my worn out name
Sweet freedom in isolation
And so, in smiling solitude
I walked and smoked too much
Staring at the moody ocean
As we all inevitably do
As though it holds answers
And indeed it does
The answer is "being"
One hot but breezy day
I followed the coast from north to south
Not too far but far enough
Until I came upon a harbour
Tiny and insignificant
But a harbour nonetheless
With a clutch of small boats
Bobbing and swaying lazily
On the backwater slack water tide
And somewhere close by
A nautical bell tolled the rhythm
Of an endless heedless movement
And an oddly comfortable melancholy
Rocked me in it's arms
Lost and found
Beginning and end
In as much as everything matters
Though nothing matters much
This place was nothing to me
No more than countless others
But that harbour bell
So patient and so constant
Touched something deeper than knowledge
Perhaps it was the state of my health
Or the glowing heat of the day
But some vulnerable receptor
Vibrated to that gentle toll
I've been in many places in my life
And seen wondrous famous sights
All seared into my minds eye
But their memories will last no longer
Than the haunting harbour bell
By Phil Roberts
Jul 2, 2017
Jul 2, 2017 at 11:06 AM UTC
set in with uncertainty
we watch the sun go down
scarlet beams from the sky illuminate your pity
remember the night you looked stunning
the sky hit your skin
our bodies vibrated in the warm tides
it was wonderful right
Aug 4, 2021
Aug 4, 2021 at 2:09 PM UTC
Warming up like an electric orchestra,
the sound of your dad’s band practice seeped
through the vents from the basement.
Drums vibrated from the floor into my feet,
And we tapped our toes together,
thump thump thump.
Drowning out the 80’s punk, your mom
plays polka in the kitchen, making pasta. I stand
over the sauce stained stove watching the *** of water
sizzle to accordion cries and the idea of clogs. We sway
from side to side. Your hands hang off my hips.
Retreating, back to your blue room, we wait
for the wafting smells of garlic, grilled onions and
peppers to call us for dinner. You pull out your
keyboard, a pen, a pad. Pressing buttons, I hear
synthesizers and song samples through your
headphones. We smile, bobbing our heads in sync,
Bump, bump, bump.
~
Finding myself in a foreign living room,
I am alone. The TV is on mute and a “motivational”
speech muffles through his speakers. There are no
basement bands. No pasta, no polka, or clogs and cries.
Only sounds of silence. I press my feet against the floor.
I can’t hear the bumps, I can’t feel the thumps
Mar 2, 2017
Mar 2, 2017 at 2:18 PM UTC
we met only every midnight
by the dark sea in moonlight
where the driftwood pile
of our common heart ache
was put on top of the other
to burn it down
and mourn for a little
we had too much whisky
with a decaying *****
pressing our nicotine lungs
staring at the hopeless fire
and stepping on the dark sand
we belonged to no one
and no where
the earthquake vibrated
our empty soul
leaving the driftwood pile
with the thin air
the warmth of fire
and the sentimental shore
that night we planned
our tender demise
Jan 3, 2017
Jan 3, 2017 at 1:31 PM UTC
I remember climbing out my window,
skulking off into a violent blizzard.
Lost in teenage anguish,
my feet carried me forward through the storm.
Two a.m. and a mile I out I realize,
I'm walking towards her house
Panic slammed my body like a tidal wave,
my nerves vibrated,
shaking the bitter cold.
I carried on determined.
No plan of action,
just full of **** and vigor and something...
Something I hadn't yet known.
The walk up her street is done with tremendous effort,
like swimming in jello.
Standing outside her house,
I'm suddenly aware of another obstacle.
I don't have a cell-phone.
Which window is her room?
Assuming it's upstairs, this is fifty - fifty you sonofabitch.
Take the risk.
I throw a small stone but hear it explode like a firecracker on the window.
Silence.
I reach for another when a soft voice calls my name.
We stand in the street and talk for a while,
holding one another.
I'm sorry, I can't stay, they probably know I'm gone.
I just... I just wanted to say goodbye
I walked backwards the whole way down the street.
Streetlights and snowfall created an amber aura around her.
That,
was the first time I knew what love was.
Sometimes I think it was the last time, too.
Apr 24, 2015
Apr 24, 2015 at 10:59 PM UTC
Oh sharp diamond, my mother!
I could not count the cost
of all your faces, your moods--
that present that I lost.
Sweet girl, my deathbed,
my jewel-fingered lady,
your portrait flickered all night
by the bulbs of the tree.
Your face as calm as the moon
over a mannered sea,
presided at the family reunion,
the twelve grandchildren
you used to wear on your wrist,
a three-months-old baby,
a fat check you never wrote,
the red-haired toddler who danced the twist,
your aging daughters, each one a wife,
each one talking to the family cook,
each one avoiding your portrait,
each one aping your life.
Later, after the party,
after the house went to bed,
I sat up drinking the Christmas brandy,
watching your picture,
letting the tree move in and out of focus.
The bulbs vibrated.
They were a halo over your forehead.
Then they were a beehive,
blue, yellow, green, red;
each with its own juice, each hot and alive
stinging your face. But you did not move.
I continued to watch, forcing myself,
waiting, inexhaustible, thirty-five.
I wanted your eyes, like the shadows
of two small birds, to change.
But they did not age.
The smile that gathered me in, all wit,
all charm, was invincible.
Hour after hour I looked at your face
but I could not pull the roots out of it.
Then I watched how the sun hit your red sweater, your withered neck,
your badly painted flesh-pink skin.
You who led me by the nose, I saw you as you were.
Then I thought of your body
as one thinks of ******
Then I said Mary--
Mary, Mary, forgive me
and then I touched a present for the child,
the last I bred before your death;
and then I touched my breast
and then I touched the floor
and then my breast again as if,
somehow, it were one of yours.
1.6k
He only lost her when
the music stopped
inner light faded from her face
her narrow arms, restless eels
winding through her shirt
snapping at the rising buzz
of voices, increasingly unbearable.
The teacher swooped in, miming
arms held close, contained; too late
for the pianist, armed with her name
and a captive audience, he accented
her frailty with two sharp syllables
and she was gone from there
to some mysterious world
away from the crowd frozen
in the silent beat after
the reprimand.
It was only a moment
before the music resumed
opening notes vibrated up
through her toes, lovely arms
unraveled and rose overhead
her radiant smile
unfurled like forgiveness.
Dec 15, 2015
Dec 15, 2015 at 12:01 PM UTC
You met Judith
in the woods
at the back
of the cottage
you had the mutt with you
taking it for a walk
on the lead
in case it ran off
she was by
the small pond
in her summer dress
her hair tied back
by a dark blue ribbon
why did you bring your dog?
she asked
the parents said
she needed
to stretch her legs
you replied
looking beyond her
at the small pond
where you used to sit
trying to fish
but caught nothing
where shall we go?
she asked
let’s go sit
by the small lake
(as you called
the large pond)
and we can sit and talk
what about your dog?
oh she’ll be ok
I can tie her lead
to the nearest tree
she’ll have room
to move around
and sniff and root out
insects if she likes
you said
I bet you say that
to all the girls
Judith said
and laughed
and you smiled
and took in
her laughter
and the way
she laughed
her eyes
brightening up
her lips parting
like a breaking dawn
and taking
your spare hand
she walked you through
the woods stepping over
brambles and fallen branches
to get to the outer fence
which she climbed over
but you climbed through
and the mutt walked under
and as you walked
across the field
to the lake
she said
I hope no one saw us
the other day
when we did those things
why
what makes you think they did?
you asked
holding the mutt in check
as it tried to run off
just something
my mother said
before I came out
this morning
when I said
I was meeting you
oh
you said
was she on the war path?
no
but it was the way she said it
as if she knew something
about us or me and you
and that day
and where we were
a rook flew overhead
a black flap of wings
a loud call
shouldn’t think
so you said
watching the rook
fly off
the mutt barking
maybe
she was just trying
to dig out something
or maybe she just thinks
the worst of me
you said
maybe
Judith said
and became silent
as you both moved
towards the large pond
( the lake as you called it)
and sat down
after tying the mutt
to the nearest tree
where it sat staring
at you both
with its dark eyes
as Judith laid her head
on your shoulder
staring out
at the skin of water
on the pond
and the slight shimmer
where dragonflies
came and went
on the surface
and whispered
I love you
which vibrated
along your shoulder
and into your heart
and you couldn’t see a time
you’d not be together
or ever
this side of death
be apart.
Jan 18, 2013
Jan 18, 2013 at 3:15 AM UTC