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"underpants" poems
Whatever you do, keep smiling. Be nice to everyone and stand up for your rights. There are many paths to the top of the mountain but few of them are on the map. Keep running, never give up, and watch out for the seriously weird. Avoid psychopaths, if you can recognize them, be polite to witches and warlocks, eschew cannibals, beware of the hippopotamus in heat, don’t drink the second bottle when dancing the Funky Chicken, and only massage someone without pimples or hairy legs. Never give up and keep smiling. It's a hard life, it's a beautiful world, life's a ***** it's great to be alive, life is nasty, brutish and short, don’t give up and keep smiling. Everyone is a guru but ignorance is everywhere, and don't mix hallucinogens with depressants. If someone tells you that they're honest, treat them with the greatest suspicion. Live to the limits, we're only alive once, and that's just as well, because imagine if people you didn't like were immortal. Keep smiling, never give up, always hawk to windward, and never leave your underpants or ******* behind. Everyone's equal but only the strong survive, especially when they take from the weak because what you seize is what you get. The meek shall inherit the earth, but the earth that they inherit will be of poor quality with no mineral deposits. Party lots, work hard, never give up, and keep smiling. Don't work so hard you don't enjoy yourself, remember that the bird is on the wing, then it falls off its perch and becomes a miserable pile of feathers and feet. The fast lane is the best lane but it's very smooth and slippery and there are no road rules. Watch out for lawyers. Seriously. They put the devil in the details while their hand is in your wallet. Everything comes to you if only you can wait, but this takes too long. Clean your teeth, obey authority, except for arrogant ******** and don't forget that love and pleasure are most important, despite what anybody else says. When you panic, other people will panic, which is good, because in this confusion, you can make your escape. Mike T Minehan
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Oct 31, 2012
Oct 31, 2012 at 9:14 PM UTC
Advice from Others
Whatever you do, keep smiling. Be nice to everyone and stand up for your rights. There are many paths to the top of the mountain but few of them are on the map. Keep running, never give up, and watch out for the seriously weird. Avoid psychopaths, if you can recognize them, be polite to witches and warlocks, eschew cannibals, beware of the hippopotamus in heat, don’t drink the second bottle when dancing the Funky Chicken, and only massage someone without pimples or hairy legs. Never give up and keep smiling. It's a hard life, it's a beautiful world, life's a ***** it's great to be alive, life is nasty, brutish and short, don’t give up and keep smiling. Everyone is a guru but ignorance is everywhere, and don't mix hallucinogens with depressants. If someone tells you that they're honest, treat them with the greatest suspicion. Live to the limits, we're only alive once, and that's just as well, because imagine if people you didn't like were immortal. Keep smiling, never give up, always hawk to windward, and never leave your underpants or ******* behind. Everyone's equal but only the strong survive, especially when they take from the weak because what you seize is what you get. The meek shall inherit the earth, but the earth that they inherit will be of poor quality with no mineral deposits. Party lots, work hard, never give up, and keep smiling. Don't work so hard you don't enjoy yourself, remember that the bird is on the wing, then it falls off its perch and becomes a miserable pile of feathers and feet. The fast lane is the best lane but it's very smooth and slippery and there are no road rules. Watch out for lawyers. Seriously. They put the devil in the details while their hand is in your wallet. Everything comes to you if only you can wait, but this takes too long. Clean your teeth, obey authority, except for arrogant ******** and don't forget that love and pleasure are most important, despite what anybody else says. When you panic, other people will panic, which is good, because in this confusion, you can make your escape. Mike T Minehan
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53
If you're attacked by a Lion Find fresh underpants to try on Lay on the ground quite still Pretend you are very ill Keep like that day after day Perhaps the lion will go away
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10k
The Lion
How can I be myself if you are my vampire? I can never sleep at night. The windows won’t stay closed. You come and go as you please when I am in my pajamas, such as they are A tee shirt and underpants You are always trying to mesmerize me But it is you who is really Always you Who can blame you? It must be complete torture to look at me And feel me But never possess me If you could only eat me. If you were my Siamese twin I would **** you Can you imagine? I would hack you off with no qualms Or saw slowly, it doesn’t much matter Even if I bled out You are a quagmire. An existence always with you You knowing me better than I know myself Listening to my thoughts Stealing everything and thinking it’s yours I am not you And you are not me We are not a we I am not the key to your survival You, a peculiar abscess That faces me and holds a conversation That wants to do this or that The endless talking. The windows closed The heavy curtains drawn Me in my underwear I’d watch you while you slept Thinking about crosses and solutions
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Sep 22, 2018
Sep 22, 2018 at 11:37 PM UTC
Revenge of the Creature
Girls will be girls they’ll sing and dance so boys can’t help but grab girls right in their underpants Girls will be girls they’ll flirt and sass but they never **** ‘cause they aren’t crass Girls will be girls they’ll study hard to ****** the boys who’ll mow the yard Girls will be girls they’ll say no and stop but we won’t believe them: the boys are cops! Girls will be girls they’ll cook and clean and raise the kids but must stay lean Girls will be girls they’ll work all day and take home just part of what boys are paid Girls will be girls they’ll talk and chat but then get hysterical when boys call them fat Girls will be girls they’ll wear nice dresses and never soil them wiping up boys’ messes Girls will be girls they’ll run and vote while boys drink beer and win and gloat Girls will be girls and we know what that means: they must always smile and never scream Girls will be girls so let’s hope and pray that girls are girls enough to save this ****** up world we boys have made.
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Oct 6, 2018
Oct 6, 2018 at 7:05 PM UTC
Girls will be girls
The boy haden't bathed in over a month His **** crack was itching and burning His underpants were soaked in slimy, wet muck And his toes a thick jam were churning His armpits stank worse than a fat pigs raw *** His breath smelled like rancid fish His hair was so oily, matted to his head His own mother wouldn't give him a kiss "Enough!" he cried as a passing fly died When he raised his arm to exclaim. "I must bathe right away! I am long overdue!" "I sure hope the washcloths are brave." "To the bathroom man!" He shouted as he ran And his underpants sloppily squished "I will remove this filth and brush my green teeth" "And my mother I will kiss!" "The closet's ahead!" He said as he sped. And he stopped there to get some stuff. Some soap, some shampoo and a towel or two. But he knew that it wasn't enough. Look though he might, to his horror and fright, Not a single washcloth could he find. Then panic set in 'cause the stink of his skin Was driving him out of his mind. He looked yet again but to his chagrin The washcloth shelf was bare. The washcloths had run off For they would not wash So filthy a boy on a dare "Oh what will I do!" "Boo-hoo, boo-hoo!" The boy cried as flies swarmed his head. "I'd **** myself but I already smell" "Far worse than anything dead!" Then one washcloth came back Holding it's nose and a sack Of bath salts that smelled like dill. It said to the boy "Go pickle yourself!" "And give me a nausea pill!" So the boy rejoiced and filled the tub With water, hot as he could stand. And using the bath salts, he jumped right in And the pickling began. He lathered the washcloth with water and soap And scrubbed with all of his might. Away he washed all of the filth 'Til none was left in sight. He washed his hair and brushed his teeth And dried and dressed himself well. And the washcloth exclaimed as it hung on the tub "Holy crap! that was pure hell!" So the boy now clean ran to be seen By his mother he loved so much. And she gave him a kiss and said "This is pure bliss!" "I can kiss you and keep down my lunch!" The moral I'll tell you and true I will be So no one will say that I lied. Don't wait a whole month to take a bath Or you washcloths may run and hide.
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Aug 1, 2012
Aug 1, 2012 at 7:53 AM UTC
The Stinky Boy
The boy haden't bathed in over a month His **** crack was itching and burning His underpants were soaked in slimy, wet muck And his toes a thick jam were churning His armpits stank worse than a fat pigs raw *** His breath smelled like rancid fish His hair was so oily, matted to his head His own mother wouldn't give him a kiss "Enough!" he cried as a passing fly died When he raised his arm to exclaim. "I must bathe right away! I am long overdue!" "I sure hope the washcloths are brave." "To the bathroom man!" He shouted as he ran And his underpants sloppily squished "I will remove this filth and brush my green teeth" "And my mother I will kiss!" "The closet's ahead!" He said as he sped. And he stopped there to get some stuff. Some soap, some shampoo and a towel or two. But he knew that it wasn't enough. Look though he might, to his horror and fright, Not a single washcloth could he find. Then panic set in 'cause the stink of his skin Was driving him out of his mind. He looked yet again but to his chagrin The washcloth shelf was bare. The washcloths had run off For they would not wash So filthy a boy on a dare "Oh what will I do!" "Boo-hoo, boo-hoo!" The boy cried as flies swarmed his head. "I'd **** myself but I already smell" "Far worse than anything dead!" Then one washcloth came back Holding it's nose and a sack Of bath salts that smelled like dill. It said to the boy "Go pickle yourself!" "And give me a nausea pill!" So the boy rejoiced and filled the tub With water, hot as he could stand. And using the bath salts, he jumped right in And the pickling began. He lathered the washcloth with water and soap And scrubbed with all of his might. Away he washed all of the filth 'Til none was left in sight. He washed his hair and brushed his teeth And dried and dressed himself well. And the washcloth exclaimed as it hung on the tub "Holy crap! that was pure hell!" So the boy now clean ran to be seen By his mother he loved so much. And she gave him a kiss and said "This is pure bliss!" "I can kiss you and keep down my lunch!" The moral I'll tell you and true I will be So no one will say that I lied. Don't wait a whole month to take a bath Or you washcloths may run and hide.
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58
This is not a poem. This is a rant. I will put on my rage face, And paint the town red, And "just go crazy, man" With the company of myself In the comfort of my own home Because I can tear my shirt, Or draw a knife Or shout shakespear off a balcony And I openly scream at the shadows Who answer politely with silence I can behave badly And if I am my only witness I can sleep at night Without the peace and solitude that comes from iron bars And padded cells I can fight with myself and indulge in the guilty pleasures That make me feel sullied and stupid I can argue with a hundred dream girls And when I sleep, They are still there in my dreams There is no loss or losing I can spend three hundred dollars Monthly on alcohol If it saves me three thousand Monthly on sanity I can look in the mirror and see a hundred different faces Each more honest to its emotion than the last I can bite my tongue to spite my face and Laugh that it was my reflection that drove me to do so, You never know what that son of a ***** will say When i am not looking I dont spend the night on the town Because I no longer need to surround myself with people. I no longer need to go out to buy a hat That suits me and makes me look interesting or meaningful When I sit alone at the bar I have no one to impress except myself And myself already knows I am unimpressive. There is no one to disappoint And while this seems like a sad tale, The truth is that it is the free-est I've ever felt. In the sanctity of a space that is mine Surrounded only by people I disagree with My reflections And shadows And to be able to write this while wearing underpants. Bukowski was right God is dead
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Jan 17, 2014
Jan 17, 2014 at 9:37 PM UTC
God Dies at the End
This is not a poem. This is a rant. I will put on my rage face, And paint the town red, And "just go crazy, man" With the company of myself In the comfort of my own home Because I can tear my shirt, Or draw a knife Or shout shakespear off a balcony And I openly scream at the shadows Who answer politely with silence I can behave badly And if I am my only witness I can sleep at night Without the peace and solitude that comes from iron bars And padded cells I can fight with myself and indulge in the guilty pleasures That make me feel sullied and stupid I can argue with a hundred dream girls And when I sleep, They are still there in my dreams There is no loss or losing I can spend three hundred dollars Monthly on alcohol If it saves me three thousand Monthly on sanity I can look in the mirror and see a hundred different faces Each more honest to its emotion than the last I can bite my tongue to spite my face and Laugh that it was my reflection that drove me to do so, You never know what that son of a ***** will say When i am not looking I dont spend the night on the town Because I no longer need to surround myself with people. I no longer need to go out to buy a hat That suits me and makes me look interesting or meaningful When I sit alone at the bar I have no one to impress except myself And myself already knows I am unimpressive. There is no one to disappoint And while this seems like a sad tale, The truth is that it is the free-est I've ever felt. In the sanctity of a space that is mine Surrounded only by people I disagree with My reflections And shadows And to be able to write this while wearing underpants. Bukowski was right God is dead
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50
Put on a clean shirt before you die, some Russian said. Nothing with drool, please, no egg spots, no blood, no sweat, no ***** You want me clean, God, so I'll try to comply. The hat I was married in, will it do? White, broad, fake flowers in a tiny array. It's old-fashioned, as stylish as a bedbug, but is suits to die in something nostalgic. And I'll take my painting shirt washed over and over of course spotted with every yellow kitchen I've painted. God, you don't mind if I bring all my kitchens? They hold the family laughter and the soup. For a bra (need we mention it?), the padded black one that my lover demeaned when I took it off. He said, "Where'd it all go?" And I'll take the maternity skirt of my ninth month, a window for the love-belly that let each baby pop out like and apple, the water breaking in the restaurant, making a noisy house I'd like to die in. For underpants I'll pick white cotton, the briefs of my childhood, for it was my mother's dictum that nice girls wore only white cotton. If my mother had lived to see it she would have put a WANTED sign up in the post office for the black, the red, the blue I've worn. Still, it would be perfectly fine with me to die like a nice girl smelling of Clorox and Duz. Being sixteen-in-the-pants I would die full of questions.
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2.9k
Clothes
Words are a fickle thing. They claim those faint of heart, Destroying those heathenish men, Who dare try to control the world Through the power of words. Those who try are instantly conquered By the omniscient dictionary, Destroyed by their constant use of a thesaurus, And taken over by attempting mimicking another man’s voice, Instead of trying to find their own. They fail because they write for the wrong reasons. They fail because of their selfishness. They fail because they want fame. They fail because their words are… Lifeless…. Hopeless... Stubborn… Their words refuse to conform to their ideas. Their words punish their minds with sleepless nights, Over their horrid word choice. Crush their dreams with metaphor upon metaphor. Win over their imaginations by continuous simile stacking. Imagine if you would, Attempting to perform heart surgery, With a sledge hammer, While a hungry lion is in the room, And you’re in your underpants. That is the challenge that these miserly men face When they sit at their desks, with their pens twirling, And their minds racing, asking why their characters Are like puppets with no puppeteer. Why their poems have no reason. Why their words truly have no power. When you write, think not about what you want to accomplish. Don’t think about what will make people stir. Think about what you feel. Feel your heart pound and your soul quake. When your words make you want to dance, That’s when you know that you wrote something worthwhile. Because it made sense to you, someone else will feel it. Someone else will know exactly what you mean. Always remember that your first draft comes from the heart.
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Sep 20, 2012
Sep 20, 2012 at 4:19 PM UTC
Words are Fickle
Words are a fickle thing. They claim those faint of heart, Destroying those heathenish men, Who dare try to control the world Through the power of words. Those who try are instantly conquered By the omniscient dictionary, Destroyed by their constant use of a thesaurus, And taken over by attempting mimicking another man’s voice, Instead of trying to find their own. They fail because they write for the wrong reasons. They fail because of their selfishness. They fail because they want fame. They fail because their words are… Lifeless…. Hopeless... Stubborn… Their words refuse to conform to their ideas. Their words punish their minds with sleepless nights, Over their horrid word choice. Crush their dreams with metaphor upon metaphor. Win over their imaginations by continuous simile stacking. Imagine if you would, Attempting to perform heart surgery, With a sledge hammer, While a hungry lion is in the room, And you’re in your underpants. That is the challenge that these miserly men face When they sit at their desks, with their pens twirling, And their minds racing, asking why their characters Are like puppets with no puppeteer. Why their poems have no reason. Why their words truly have no power. When you write, think not about what you want to accomplish. Don’t think about what will make people stir. Think about what you feel. Feel your heart pound and your soul quake. When your words make you want to dance, That’s when you know that you wrote something worthwhile. Because it made sense to you, someone else will feel it. Someone else will know exactly what you mean. Always remember that your first draft comes from the heart.
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42
*In their blind bid To become westernized, They lost touch with reality Created shadows of themselves Despised their own intrinsic values Embraced a twisted dress sense Of fallen pants and revealed underpants Idolized everything they're not The good, the bad, the ugly They birthed dual personalities Picked up foreign accents On ****** home-based passports The American Dream, they call it, As they wear winter jackets In scorching African sun All in the name of fashion Trading our simple hues For complex shades unknown Bleaching skin and hair Trading natural black for artificial white Unaware the very gods they adore Are tanning theirs to look darker Insecurity drives them mad Inferiority complex overtakes them As they ban mother tongues in offsprings Placing exotic tongues on pedestals At the expense of our cultural future. This is not an attempt at poetry This is wake up call to Africa Be bold, be proud, be black! You are BEAUTIFUL!! You are AFRICAN!!!* © Raphael Uzor
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Sep 11, 2014
Sep 11, 2014 at 5:43 PM UTC
Identity
It’s always Monday here with the hustle and bustle of the boisterous marketplace, Negotiations carried out over loudspeakers and hailers, It’s never without a fight. It’s always Monday here with the cries of half-dead swans and suffocating dolphins, Collateral damage is a word used loosely, Now that the main guy is here. Last night was a good night, befitting a Sunday’s catch, Rest is only for the lost and lonely on a lovely Sunday night. They brought them in, lined up in rows of ten, Nothing on but a white singlet and pretty underpants. They cowered in fright and tried to huddle, The whips flew as freely as the flies that came to meddle. It was not long till your turn came Pretty as a rosebud One man claimed Smooth as a rose’s petal Another one gleamed. It was all too real for you and you fell dead, in silence It’s always Monday here, someone said, She was so pretty... As they carried you on their back to dump you in the truck to throw away the body just outside the city. It’s always Monday here, said the man shaking his head, as he went to the playground to fish for another haul of fresh blood and good meat! It’s always Monday here... Someone said...
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Apr 21, 2014
Apr 21, 2014 at 7:53 AM UTC
Always Monday
I want something to calm me down at bedtime it is the only way to be Everyone should be calm at bedtime oh yeah we should It is good to be calm and it is Good to be cool But being calm at bedtime oh yes indeed Dreaming of going to space to play around with the dead Like my uncle Stan and ray And my good old dad It is really good to be calm At bedtime And think about the parties You will have and don’t forget to say as you are planning to go to bed it is a happy thing to be Welcome to Australia Britain Or France i turned to the party In my underpants just my underpants nothing more If you plan a good birthday party Plan it after bed Because you will get really tired Oh yeah my Aunty said You see plan your life never turn back yeah mate yeah it is fine It is good to be calm at bedtime Dreaming of silly things as well as smart Getting drunk in methane smoothies and you feel very cool You will always break the golden golden rule Being calm at bedtime is cool Don’t you think Welcome to Australia Britain or France I turned up to my party in my underpants just my underpants nothing more Nothing more nothing less It puts me to the test You see being cool at bedtime Oh yeah that sounds fine
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Sep 5, 2018
Sep 5, 2018 at 7:19 AM UTC
bed time dreaming, (underpants)
I                                                                             I've never hit my children. My own father spanked me perhaps ten times: for riding my bike on a busy street, for "acting up" in church. I have no nostalgia for these beatings (as in: "Sure glad Pa whupped some sense inta me as a young'n—    don't know where I'd be if he hadn't.")    He would make me pull down my pants and underpants enough to expose my buttocks, position me between his legs so he could hold my own legs still, bend me over his left leg with his left arm, and hit me with his bare right hand. What I remember as much as the pain is his angry expression: Was he angry at me? Or at something else? I believe it was mostly an unpleasant duty; usually done because my mother had asked him. They were afraid we'd become juvenile delinquents.    I suppose his own father had spanked him-- and that he, in turn, had been spanked by his father-- a family tradition. . . .    There've been times with my own children-- God knows they're far from perfect-- where I've almost given in to anger. Somehow I've always caught myself, always remembered that unseemliness. . . .             II Our house is kind of ugly from the front, a split-level with the whole left side facing the street being a solid brick wall. Our picture window faces the grass and trees of the back yard. Each morning, no matter how much of a hurry I'm in, I open the curtains to this window-- that my children might see not just the man-made objects of our living room but some hint of the grace and beauty of the whole, great, natural world.
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Jul 30, 2017
Jul 30, 2017 at 3:54 PM UTC
Spankings
I                                                                             I've never hit my children. My own father spanked me perhaps ten times: for riding my bike on a busy street, for "acting up" in church. I have no nostalgia for these beatings (as in: "Sure glad Pa whupped some sense inta me as a young'n—    don't know where I'd be if he hadn't.")    He would make me pull down my pants and underpants enough to expose my buttocks, position me between his legs so he could hold my own legs still, bend me over his left leg with his left arm, and hit me with his bare right hand. What I remember as much as the pain is his angry expression: Was he angry at me? Or at something else? I believe it was mostly an unpleasant duty; usually done because my mother had asked him. They were afraid we'd become juvenile delinquents.    I suppose his own father had spanked him-- and that he, in turn, had been spanked by his father-- a family tradition. . . .    There've been times with my own children-- God knows they're far from perfect-- where I've almost given in to anger. Somehow I've always caught myself, always remembered that unseemliness. . . .             II Our house is kind of ugly from the front, a split-level with the whole left side facing the street being a solid brick wall. Our picture window faces the grass and trees of the back yard. Each morning, no matter how much of a hurry I'm in, I open the curtains to this window-- that my children might see not just the man-made objects of our living room but some hint of the grace and beauty of the whole, great, natural world.
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35
I knocked my knee on the rod under the table. I put a runner in my tights. I licked my finger to wash the wound clean. It stung for only a second. Then it was as if it never happened. The ditsy waitress with the blonde bun and bubblegum was annoying me with the way she wouldn't pick up her feet. She had a stupid Chinese tattoo on her wrist, and like most of the world she thought she could use a band aid as a cover up, but nothing that obvious stays hidden that long without being noticed. And to top it all off, they burnt my tuna melt. I got weird looks from people who passed, catching the 50 Shades of Grey title on my book, disgusted and pondering why I would ever hold it up in a family restaurant. The black man was eyeing me up in the corner. The lady with the pink lipstick in her teeth thought I was erratic and disturbed. The businessman thought it was merely for attention, Well jokes on them, I did it just to **** them off. That's when I looked over at you, You were eating breakfast and a ****** cup of coffee. It was 4 in the afternoon. I could see your Captain America underpants creeping out of your jeans without a belt. I could see your eyes judging the newspaper headlines. You seemed almost as unhappy as me. So I went over and asked if you dropped the pen I found in my pocket, and when you didn't even look up at me to respond I told you it was just a poor excuse to talk to you. "I respect that," you said between bites of your omelet. You glanced up at me for only a moment, blue eyes, **** chin probably expecting me to leave after the prolonged silence, but I sat there unchanged, I don't really pick up on social cues. "You're pretty hot." I guess neither do you. I smiled something creepy, because I don't do it that often, You didn't seem to mind. Within two minutes you had me laughing, saying stuff too loud, and it was the first time that I think I actually saw myself, and I don't really even know you but somehow, insanely it feels like I already do.
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Feb 7, 2013
Feb 7, 2013 at 6:39 PM UTC
Captain America (50 Shades of Tuna)
I knocked my knee on the rod under the table. I put a runner in my tights. I licked my finger to wash the wound clean. It stung for only a second. Then it was as if it never happened. The ditsy waitress with the blonde bun and bubblegum was annoying me with the way she wouldn't pick up her feet. She had a stupid Chinese tattoo on her wrist, and like most of the world she thought she could use a band aid as a cover up, but nothing that obvious stays hidden that long without being noticed. And to top it all off, they burnt my tuna melt. I got weird looks from people who passed, catching the 50 Shades of Grey title on my book, disgusted and pondering why I would ever hold it up in a family restaurant. The black man was eyeing me up in the corner. The lady with the pink lipstick in her teeth thought I was erratic and disturbed. The businessman thought it was merely for attention, Well jokes on them, I did it just to **** them off. That's when I looked over at you, You were eating breakfast and a ****** cup of coffee. It was 4 in the afternoon. I could see your Captain America underpants creeping out of your jeans without a belt. I could see your eyes judging the newspaper headlines. You seemed almost as unhappy as me. So I went over and asked if you dropped the pen I found in my pocket, and when you didn't even look up at me to respond I told you it was just a poor excuse to talk to you. "I respect that," you said between bites of your omelet. You glanced up at me for only a moment, blue eyes, **** chin probably expecting me to leave after the prolonged silence, but I sat there unchanged, I don't really pick up on social cues. "You're pretty hot." I guess neither do you. I smiled something creepy, because I don't do it that often, You didn't seem to mind. Within two minutes you had me laughing, saying stuff too loud, and it was the first time that I think I actually saw myself, and I don't really even know you but somehow, insanely it feels like I already do.
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52
When a barroom filled with laughter can't lift your head, even momentarily, from your sad, soggy plate of nachos-for-one... When passing girls in narrow hallways flash the fires of passion from their eyes into yours simply to be smothered under a heavy, wet blanket stare; a cumbersome quilt of all your yesterdays' shame... When the supernal opportunity to live for another 24 hrs is met with all the ambition and grace of a house cat forced into a cold bath... You are used up to this world. You are lost to your purpose of being. You are dropped to the dirt like a flower whose spiked stem pricked the caressing fingers of it's holder. Hold no expectation of a familiar, loving hand to reach down, relieved to pick you up and reunite you with what you wish to be; or to place you where you belong. Look around, The ground is littered with us unwanted things. We've all seen that ***** pair of disregarded underwear, miserably caked in rainwater mud, laying on the side of a road or under a bridge somewhere. Whose hand is reaching down for that? But, I won't compare myself to a bum's forgotten underpants and neither should you. I'm sure the universe views us differently than that. It will soon pick us up, wash us of all those grimy wrongs and wear us out anew. Yes, that has to be true.
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Jun 16, 2013
Jun 16, 2013 at 6:44 PM UTC
The Unwanted Things
*Fingers frolic beneath the confines of soaking wet underpants Tasting yourself..... Forcefully jamming every inch of finger down your passion filled throat....*
0
Jun 24, 2016
Jun 24, 2016 at 9:29 PM UTC
Passion #49
Attention Wal-Mart Shoppers.. You know them You've seen them I hope you aren't one of them... I don't drink Not anymore For my entertainment I go to the store I go out after dinner That's when the show will start I go and watch the people Who shop at Wal-Mart Cowboy boots, a tutu, and yoga pants with *** with a muscle shirt and top hat worn by a man named REX a pair of pants just hanging a pair of crocs and leather vest with "she loves me for my money" emblazoned on the chest These are the people Yes, you know the people We've all seen the people In their finest shopping clothes These are the people Yes, you know the people We've all seen the people At Wal-Mart, so it goes I don't go clubbing There's no fun in that Late night trips to Wal-Mart That, is where it's at A woman dressed in plastic a man all painted blue and how many people have you seen that look like escapees from the zoo These are the people Yes, you know the people We've all seen the people In their finest shopping clothes These are the people Yes, you know the people We've all seen the people At Wal-Mart, so it goes Underpants, and stockings garters and blue jeans size 50 denim jumpers Stretched like skinny jeans Men wearing high heels Women wearing...well Use your imaginations From a distance you can't tell These are the people Yes, you know the people We've all seen the people In their finest shopping clothes These are the people Yes, you know the people We've all seen the people At Wal-Mart, so it goes Body parts free to see ******* and legs and butts And people with their little dogs The ugly, squeaky mutts We know them and we watch them Take their photos Yes....we do. dress right when you go shopping Or we may take one of you!!!
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Aug 24, 2013
Aug 24, 2013 at 5:43 PM UTC
Attention...Walmart Shoppers
Attention Wal-Mart Shoppers.. You know them You've seen them I hope you aren't one of them... I don't drink Not anymore For my entertainment I go to the store I go out after dinner That's when the show will start I go and watch the people Who shop at Wal-Mart Cowboy boots, a tutu, and yoga pants with *** with a muscle shirt and top hat worn by a man named REX a pair of pants just hanging a pair of crocs and leather vest with "she loves me for my money" emblazoned on the chest These are the people Yes, you know the people We've all seen the people In their finest shopping clothes These are the people Yes, you know the people We've all seen the people At Wal-Mart, so it goes I don't go clubbing There's no fun in that Late night trips to Wal-Mart That, is where it's at A woman dressed in plastic a man all painted blue and how many people have you seen that look like escapees from the zoo These are the people Yes, you know the people We've all seen the people In their finest shopping clothes These are the people Yes, you know the people We've all seen the people At Wal-Mart, so it goes Underpants, and stockings garters and blue jeans size 50 denim jumpers Stretched like skinny jeans Men wearing high heels Women wearing...well Use your imaginations From a distance you can't tell These are the people Yes, you know the people We've all seen the people In their finest shopping clothes These are the people Yes, you know the people We've all seen the people At Wal-Mart, so it goes Body parts free to see ******* and legs and butts And people with their little dogs The ugly, squeaky mutts We know them and we watch them Take their photos Yes....we do. dress right when you go shopping Or we may take one of you!!!
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…i have learned my lesson / One should not give the impression / of being too happy / as you don’t do happy / you and angry / are comfortable / misery / your longtime friend / but with happy / you are unacquainted / and / too much joviality / for too long a period / puts the proverbial underpants in a bunch / too much free-range fondling / and unnecessary emotion / is a commotion / that puts the Neanderthal in you / into uncharted territory / off the clear and obvious path / with a virtual stick / banging the bushes of my spirit / waiting to see what emerges / and surprisingly / you are surprised / that what emerges is / seldom what you expect / but what do you expect? / That i will continually ride this / histrionic rollercoaster? / apprehensively peaking hills? / uncertainly braving valleys? / stop the maniacal ups and downs i think i want to get off / on you / and with you / but that just wont do / cuz you / fail to realize / that I am / percolating and oozing / straight inundated with / sweetness / and to get the full overflow / of said sweetness / is a privilege… / and not a right… / therefore / to the benefit of no one / and as a consequence of your / vacillation and inconstancy / i have made the determination / to Cap this most fundamental Well / sadly / i have learned my lesson…
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Jan 29, 2012
Jan 29, 2012 at 7:21 AM UTC
Wake Up Call
I must confess that a while ago, I wanted to be a superhero, you know, to blaze like a thousand suns and shout hello, I’m here. Yes, you're right, it was a bit pathetic, really, but you see,  I was afraid of being just another speck in the swarm of time, swallowed up and insignificant. So now I’ve changed, and I just want to say hello,  I love you. Love is incredibly more incandescent, iridescent and resplendent than all that hero stuff and blind ambition and all that exhibitionism. Maybe my spandex suit was too tight in the crotch, or whatever, but so what, I now don't feel the need to be a superhero at all. Yeah, so all of those old galaxies can spin around and glow in the dark and wheel through time as much as they like, because I’m doing just fine now, simply being me, right here. And anyway, love is much more fun because love is when you don't have to wear your underpants on the outside, like all those superheroes. Actually, and this is very logical, because when you're a lover, you don't have to wear any underpants at all. Mike T Minehan
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Oct 30, 2012
Oct 30, 2012 at 9:49 PM UTC
I Must Confess
You deserve a poem, at the very least, you really ought to have a feast, with all the people that, see you, for you, you deserve to have sounds from stars, playing to delight, till your day has become your night, you took a chance, on a broken, tired rhymed poet, it's your birthday, and this is the best I can do, you deserve a band, and people to recognize you across the land, to wish you a special day, because you have that way, to make people feel, like it's their day, depression and nutella, socks and underpants, dances with no end, you deserve the better, and never just something, people feel like that they lend, coffee with cats, castles with open mic nights, you deserve more, a year ago I would have killed to write this, a year ago you were just a kid, behind bars, or across oceans, you deserve more, a year from meow, I know that you will be even better, because, **** girl, like a meteor, you'll make another big impact, you deserve more than a poem, but it's what I can give at the very least, and all that's left to write, is, Happy Birthday.
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Dec 16, 2017
Dec 16, 2017 at 4:03 PM UTC
Oh, Mysterious.
I don't know what it is I like about you. I like your mannerisms, your politeness and your willingness to chat to my mother with a smile on your face that says you aren't scared of the world, and welcoming arms that embrace the unknown and death. I like your warmth, how you complain that I'm always cold but my house is too boiling hot and that you strip down to your underpants as soon as you walk in. But there is no half dressed for you. It's nakedness or done up to the boots. You'll even lie in bed with your boots on, smoking, and I hate when you do because I know you're texting. Waiting on a lift. And that's it for a month or more. I like how you're so unpredictable, how irritating you are. I like your stupidity but I hate you and I don't know what I like about you.
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Nov 8, 2013
Nov 8, 2013 at 6:00 PM UTC
Fool
If, Mother washed her pinny And father never swore, If, Jimmy went to the loo Instead of on the floor, If, Our Sammy didn't turn up In his underpants for tea, If, Our granddad would keep his flies done up Phoo, that's an awful sight to see, If, Gran's teeth refused to fall out When she dropped off to sleep, If, My sister didn't steal my razor This beard I wouldn't keep, If, That copper had only looked the other way Our Robbie wouldn't be spending time in jail today, If, Our Lucy had bothered to learn the facts of life Eight kids wouldn't be here now causing so much strife, If, We all stopped smoking **** And swilling beer till we were sick This family would be smart, very elegant and slick Heather P Wilson..........http://www.heatherpwilsonpoems.com/
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Feb 8, 2013
Feb 8, 2013 at 5:44 PM UTC
If Our Family
I don't want a Hollywood love. I don't want a hot pink, blazing hot love. I want my love to be cotton briefs. I want my love to cradle that which I hold dear. I want my love to be gentle and soft, But only I can feel it. You don't share your underpants As such I don't share my love. It is only mine. I want my love to make others feel uncomfortable when I talk about it. Because the more I rant on, the more they realize that while sometimes it sounds constricting, it keeps you all together when you need to move. I want my love to be marked with my last name. To have and to hold forever. Because I know that my love will be with me Through all the **** all the ******* and every last bit of life. Even if my love rides up every once in a while I know that it's just trying it's best. And I love my love for that.
0
Mar 23, 2015
Mar 23, 2015 at 10:50 PM UTC
Love like Underpants
Shortly after the school systems began defecating on the dreams of my generation, We found different outlets Through which we could bring our loathing to a head. My generation now writes poetry and Finds solace in video games we can beat In lives we can't seem to live the right way. It's funny to me that The Legend of Zelda, When completed, Tells you that "You are great!" While your teacher berates you for being sub-par Though you tried your damnedest To please them through drafts and drafts And drafts of work Spat out at 4am because There are more important things to deal with In regular waking hours, In regular waking life. They tell us that we have failed Because we ****** up in one class, A single credit, A single number on a sheet of paper That tries to measure us When we can't even attempt to do the same. They tell us we have failed Because we do not look good on file And apparently we do not look good Walking down the street With ****** eyes and baggy sweaters, The only clean clothes we own Because the system has ****** us clean of time To do much else than Study, study, STUDY our **** lives away. This is atrocious. When a young boy feels more accomplished Beating Pokemon Than he does when he writes a stellar paper, The best he can pen Only to be told he has a lot more work to do And that the paper "Is good... But it needs work." The culture of my generation does not discriminate. It does not tell us that we have more work to do. Instead, it tells us that "we are great" and It gives us a restart screen when we **** up beyond repair. It does not tell us we have failed, Instead offers us a kind "Try again?" It is sad When the voice over of a video game Offers more kindness Than our instructors and parents Combined. School should not send us home, wanting to **** ourselves. The system should not make a pen cap, A pair of underpants, a simple metal bookmark A weapon In the hands of the human entity of depression. We will not be marked suicide risks. As long as we keep getting our restart screens and Compliments from bits, We will triumph. We will be the heroes of our generation As long as we keep getting the chance. One day, when all the suffering is over And we have escaped this war-torn soul of "The Caring Community," Maybe those words will extend from an NES and find their way Into the mouth of a boyfriend, girlfriend, Wife, husband, friend, professor... Someday, we will hear the words and we will truly believe them. "You are great!" Maybe not today... But someday. Soon.
0
Dec 13, 2013
Dec 13, 2013 at 10:16 AM UTC
You are Great
Shortly after the school systems began defecating on the dreams of my generation, We found different outlets Through which we could bring our loathing to a head. My generation now writes poetry and Finds solace in video games we can beat In lives we can't seem to live the right way. It's funny to me that The Legend of Zelda, When completed, Tells you that "You are great!" While your teacher berates you for being sub-par Though you tried your damnedest To please them through drafts and drafts And drafts of work Spat out at 4am because There are more important things to deal with In regular waking hours, In regular waking life. They tell us that we have failed Because we ****** up in one class, A single credit, A single number on a sheet of paper That tries to measure us When we can't even attempt to do the same. They tell us we have failed Because we do not look good on file And apparently we do not look good Walking down the street With ****** eyes and baggy sweaters, The only clean clothes we own Because the system has ****** us clean of time To do much else than Study, study, STUDY our **** lives away. This is atrocious. When a young boy feels more accomplished Beating Pokemon Than he does when he writes a stellar paper, The best he can pen Only to be told he has a lot more work to do And that the paper "Is good... But it needs work." The culture of my generation does not discriminate. It does not tell us that we have more work to do. Instead, it tells us that "we are great" and It gives us a restart screen when we **** up beyond repair. It does not tell us we have failed, Instead offers us a kind "Try again?" It is sad When the voice over of a video game Offers more kindness Than our instructors and parents Combined. School should not send us home, wanting to **** ourselves. The system should not make a pen cap, A pair of underpants, a simple metal bookmark A weapon In the hands of the human entity of depression. We will not be marked suicide risks. As long as we keep getting our restart screens and Compliments from bits, We will triumph. We will be the heroes of our generation As long as we keep getting the chance. One day, when all the suffering is over And we have escaped this war-torn soul of "The Caring Community," Maybe those words will extend from an NES and find their way Into the mouth of a boyfriend, girlfriend, Wife, husband, friend, professor... Someday, we will hear the words and we will truly believe them. "You are great!" Maybe not today... But someday. Soon.
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74
Like Winston Smith, I think it’s time to start a diary. Follow me now:  it’s April in Oceania, The cruelest month, The silly season, printemps, A regular I see London, I see France. I see Winston’s Underpants. If you catch my drift? La Primavera: Vivaldi’s rocking the Juke box and the vote, Botticelli’s painting, A mural on Jerusalem's wailing wall. My diary will be hard evidence of thought crime. Thought crime: one of the more severe varieties of Religious experience & the most psychotic form of mental illness, In a category known as antisocial personality disorders. Thought crime means never getting into any serious trouble, Until you’re caught, can we at least agree on that? So, we'd better add the DSM to our stack of essential literary classics. The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Published by the American Psychiatric Association, Providing a common language, A shrink’s Esperanto. DSM-IV codes classify mental disorders. The DSM: a Frommer’s travel guide & User’s manual for life on planet Earth. So, like Orwell's Winston, I start a diary of my own; but Unlike Mr. Smith, I address my message to the here & What’s happening now, not the future, not the past but N-a-zayer, N-a-zither NOW. That's right, I write for the present: “If thought was ever free, it is not free now." If truth exists it is a closely guarded secret, Although McLuhan’s observations hide in plain sight: *“The new electronic interdependence, recreates The world in the image of a global village.”* Which makes us all global village idiots. We are no longer different from one another; The age of groupthink is here. I write to you from an age of security & surveillance, Warrantless search and predator drones, An age where no man is ever truly alone. From an age of standardization, replaceable parts, Whirling dervishes, dabblers in spin control, Newspeak and doublespeak, Atlas shrugged, drugged and fugged, The new world order: All but the faint of heart need apply, … "I send greetings.”
0
May 14, 2016
May 14, 2016 at 3:56 PM UTC
"My New Diary"
Like Winston Smith, I think it’s time to start a diary. Follow me now:  it’s April in Oceania, The cruelest month, The silly season, printemps, A regular I see London, I see France. I see Winston’s Underpants. If you catch my drift? La Primavera: Vivaldi’s rocking the Juke box and the vote, Botticelli’s painting, A mural on Jerusalem's wailing wall. My diary will be hard evidence of thought crime. Thought crime: one of the more severe varieties of Religious experience & the most psychotic form of mental illness, In a category known as antisocial personality disorders. Thought crime means never getting into any serious trouble, Until you’re caught, can we at least agree on that? So, we'd better add the DSM to our stack of essential literary classics. The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Published by the American Psychiatric Association, Providing a common language, A shrink’s Esperanto. DSM-IV codes classify mental disorders. The DSM: a Frommer’s travel guide & User’s manual for life on planet Earth. So, like Orwell's Winston, I start a diary of my own; but Unlike Mr. Smith, I address my message to the here & What’s happening now, not the future, not the past but N-a-zayer, N-a-zither NOW. That's right, I write for the present: “If thought was ever free, it is not free now." If truth exists it is a closely guarded secret, Although McLuhan’s observations hide in plain sight: *“The new electronic interdependence, recreates The world in the image of a global village.”* Which makes us all global village idiots. We are no longer different from one another; The age of groupthink is here. I write to you from an age of security & surveillance, Warrantless search and predator drones, An age where no man is ever truly alone. From an age of standardization, replaceable parts, Whirling dervishes, dabblers in spin control, Newspeak and doublespeak, Atlas shrugged, drugged and fugged, The new world order: All but the faint of heart need apply, … "I send greetings.”
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