Laying close to death.
Taking your last breath,
eyes closing to shaded black.
Pills in your system, ready to attack.
Rush of sirens all you hear,
all ending in your thirteenth year.
You lay there with a heart rate that is slowing,
you're dying, and your family is knowing.
On the edge of the hospital bed,
where you may as well lay there dead.
Your moms eyes fill with tears, and her heart with guilt,
as she tells you everything, when you're heart wasn't spilt.
You father, your biggest hero never leaves your side.
His ****** expressions blank, but he's crying inside.
The nurse comes in, worry on her face.
Telling you, you need to go to a bigger place.
To far to go by ambluance, so they take you by flight.
By the time you arive, it's deep late at night.
Crew and the nurses talking back and fourth but it's blured.
You know their speaking clearly but their words seem slured.
You wake, and it's finally bright outside.
You look back and forth, see your family never left your side.
The doctor comes in, and explains my condition.
They go over questions, for your admission.
Guilt and remorse is all you can feel,
everything feels like a nightmare, but it's all to real.
Theirs no way to make things right,
you can't even remember what happened last night.
IV's in your arms, you ask the doctor what came about,
the night before, He says attempted suicide without a doubt.
As memories flood back into your head,
you think I really wanted to be dead....
The doctor asks if I remember what happened the night before,
when your dad asked you what happened, not noticing the pill bottle on the floor.
After three long days, the cops come to take you to a crisis center,
handcuffs on wrists, where scars lay from before. Door opened up, you must enter.
Long ride to think of everything, looking behind you you see your parents car.
Tears run down your face, they're so close, yet so far.
As you pull up to where you'll spend your weak.
You try and talk, but the words are meak.
Your get entered into the system, then you're parents must leave.
The tears come again, but you wipe them with your sleave.
You go to your room, and close the door.
Not wanting nothing more, then someone in your arms, you fall to the floor.
After you wake, your parents are there to visit but it's not expected.
Taking you to a different area, your tears are being collected.
After six days you're ready to go home,
new areas that you're ready to roam.
You run as your dad enters the door,
you run to him and jump to give him a hug almost knocking him to the floor.
You collect your things and say good bye to all the kids there,
never wanting to go back, suicide you'd never dare.
When you get home, you've never felt more joy
Talking to your bestfriend, playing with your favorite toy.
It's so nice to finally be home in your own bed,
Now I realize "I really wanted to be dead"
