Seeing and smiling, I calmly explode,
Typically unpredictiable, I am
Shaking sorrow from my coat,
Drowning in rage.

Living and lost in oblivion,
I'm breathing but still not here.
An outsite in my own life, I
Rely on broken cruise control.

Episode

I'm scared of waiting for time,
Scared of the steel bars that may surround me,
Scared of the wall that will separate me from the outsite world
Scared of not making it thru
Scared of the consequernce of being a foolish *boy*

I regret being someones scarecrow
Wishing that I should have just stayed home
And behaved